Cautious Porsche owner upsets driver
Discussion
Looks like this careful driver caused a bit of forecourt rage!!
www.hmallett.co.uk/blog/blog/why-i-hate-porsches.html
www.hmallett.co.uk/blog/blog/why-i-hate-porsches.html
the blog writer apparently drives a fiat panda. He effervesces about its ability to do 69.1 mpg, and if you need further clues as to his character let me just re-iterate he writes a blog, the weapon of choice for anyone who can be described as "angsty".
judging by his prose id say 1) he is to literary talent what Pauline Fowler is to cheerful optimism, and 2) if that was me at the pumps filling the porker id probably have been too busy pissing myself laughing at the sad little man jumping up and down beside the fiat panda, to fill my tank up with petrol - which was probably what caused the delay in this case.
R.
ps - Sorry, i had a bit of porsche envy from someone this weekend so im still annoyed by this sort of thing. Just let me be grumpy and pretend im on my beeriod.
judging by his prose id say 1) he is to literary talent what Pauline Fowler is to cheerful optimism, and 2) if that was me at the pumps filling the porker id probably have been too busy pissing myself laughing at the sad little man jumping up and down beside the fiat panda, to fill my tank up with petrol - which was probably what caused the delay in this case.
R.
ps - Sorry, i had a bit of porsche envy from someone this weekend so im still annoyed by this sort of thing. Just let me be grumpy and pretend im on my beeriod.
Edited by M@verick on Monday 16th October 20:59
Hang on, if you're a in rush to get to the supermarket and all the pumps are busy then surely you'd go straight to the supermarket and fill up on our way out?
Have you guys read his "car stuff"? Waxing lyrical about how many miles he scraped out of his diesel panda - how does he manage paragraph after paragraph for EVERY SINGLE TANKFUL of diesel?!?!?
Have you guys read his "car stuff"? Waxing lyrical about how many miles he scraped out of his diesel panda - how does he manage paragraph after paragraph for EVERY SINGLE TANKFUL of diesel?!?!?
Hilarious 
I love people like him and take great pleasure in winding them up as much as possible whenever I cross paths with them 
If they really want to say something they'll come over and say it to your face if not they sure scare easy when you walk over to them and they have nowhere to go as the queue behind them has blocked them in
Yex
I love people like him and take great pleasure in winding them up as much as possible whenever I cross paths with them If they really want to say something they'll come over and say it to your face if not they sure scare easy when you walk over to them and they have nowhere to go as the queue behind them has blocked them in
Yex
PMSL!!!!!
If this was beverley it could well have been me he was shouting at.
Have a look at his car section, as well as the getting all excited about getting 500 miles to a tankful (which made him run out of diesel - really bright idea) he drones on about not having cleaned the wheels yet, moans about £60 for a replacement foglight, its a fiat panda man!
If this was beverley it could well have been me he was shouting at.
Have a look at his car section, as well as the getting all excited about getting 500 miles to a tankful (which made him run out of diesel - really bright idea) he drones on about not having cleaned the wheels yet, moans about £60 for a replacement foglight, its a fiat panda man!
Oh my god just read this part of his blog, the first bit makes you think he may be a normal man after all enjoying his "lay"
Laid in four hours
Saturday, 19 August 2006
I got a warm sense of satisfaction from my latest lay. And it only took four hours.
Previous layings of laminate floors, in the study and the spare bedroom, have taken two days and a full day respectively. It's not that the flooring (Ikea Tundra in Maple) is particularly hard to lay, it's just that I'm not the most skilled DIY person. The two rooms that had been done so far are both rectangular rooms, with no alcoves, cupboards or radiators, all of which make fitting more complicated. The main bedroom is about twice the size of the other rooms, and features all of those. So I felt quite pleased with myself when I had it all finished in four hours. Except when I say finished, I mean the floor is laid, but the beading and the under-door strip haven't been fitted yet. I'm sure I'll have them done before the end of September
Laid in four hours
Saturday, 19 August 2006
I got a warm sense of satisfaction from my latest lay. And it only took four hours.
Previous layings of laminate floors, in the study and the spare bedroom, have taken two days and a full day respectively. It's not that the flooring (Ikea Tundra in Maple) is particularly hard to lay, it's just that I'm not the most skilled DIY person. The two rooms that had been done so far are both rectangular rooms, with no alcoves, cupboards or radiators, all of which make fitting more complicated. The main bedroom is about twice the size of the other rooms, and features all of those. So I felt quite pleased with myself when I had it all finished in four hours. Except when I say finished, I mean the floor is laid, but the beading and the under-door strip haven't been fitted yet. I'm sure I'll have them done before the end of September
This brightened my morning! My question back to him based on the following
Tuesday, 18 April 2006
Over 500 miles out of a tankful! Admittedly I did run out of fuel in the process, but 33.51 litre yielded 509.2 miles, which gives us 69.1 mpg. The car now has 6028 miles on it, which is half way to the first service. The trip computer said 69.2 mpg, so this is the first time is has over-estimated the mpg.
For a man aged 29, who is obviously interested in the fine details of car ownership, why did he not factor in aerodynamic effect, tyre temperature / pressure - this may have lessend the gap between the 69.1 MPG and the 69.2 MPG that he experienced. He aslo forgot to mention if he had the air conditioning on - but I doubt he did!!
Tuesday, 18 April 2006
Over 500 miles out of a tankful! Admittedly I did run out of fuel in the process, but 33.51 litre yielded 509.2 miles, which gives us 69.1 mpg. The car now has 6028 miles on it, which is half way to the first service. The trip computer said 69.2 mpg, so this is the first time is has over-estimated the mpg.
For a man aged 29, who is obviously interested in the fine details of car ownership, why did he not factor in aerodynamic effect, tyre temperature / pressure - this may have lessend the gap between the 69.1 MPG and the 69.2 MPG that he experienced. He aslo forgot to mention if he had the air conditioning on - but I doubt he did!!
This means he has burnt 87 gallons of fuel with that car, more I think that I've burnt this summer in my 3.3 turbo. I wonder how he'd feels knowing his car has caused more pollution than a supercar?
People like this can never see the wood for the trees, or do basic math.
Pollution is proportional to fuel burnt:
Fuel burnt = miles travelled / miles per gallon.
You'll find most major polluters are tree huggers, or 'leaders' who tax bigger cars and then cause several oilwell fires. Doh! Next time someone tells you about the environment from their 'sensible' car - ask them how many gallons of fuel they burnt in the last year.
People like this can never see the wood for the trees, or do basic math.
Pollution is proportional to fuel burnt:
Fuel burnt = miles travelled / miles per gallon.
You'll find most major polluters are tree huggers, or 'leaders' who tax bigger cars and then cause several oilwell fires. Doh! Next time someone tells you about the environment from their 'sensible' car - ask them how many gallons of fuel they burnt in the last year.
I think this is one of those natural selection things.
He left it so late to go to the supermarket that he only had 15 minutes until it shut, and allowed his car to run so dry that he had no choice but to fill up on the way. Perhaps decisions like those are why he's driving a Panda not a Porsche!
He left it so late to go to the supermarket that he only had 15 minutes until it shut, and allowed his car to run so dry that he had no choice but to fill up on the way. Perhaps decisions like those are why he's driving a Panda not a Porsche!
im quite ashamed at actually being a member on FiatForum having read that sh*t...
I havent met the bloke but he posts on FF as hmallett (funnily enough) Didnt think he was sad enough to post stuff on a website that is that boring... my god he's a sad tw*t...
www.fiatforum.com/member.php?u=8927
I havent met the bloke but he posts on FF as hmallett (funnily enough) Didnt think he was sad enough to post stuff on a website that is that boring... my god he's a sad tw*t...
www.fiatforum.com/member.php?u=8927
Hmm.
somewhat suspiciously the author of the thread that brought hmallet (from hereon now affectionally know as a "weapons grade cock end" - thanks and royalties to Vesuvius
) to us has posted as "cghobbs" - with one day and one post's history.
Checking the forums section of the WGCE's site, under "not so serious stuff" (Im guessing that mpg and lino flooring are discussed at length on other parts of the forum) It seems that cghobbs manages the "Friday Fun" thread therein, and seems to be in regular contact with the WGCE.
So i have to ask - cghobbs, do you *know* this hmallet person?. Come on man, unmask the legend.
R.
somewhat suspiciously the author of the thread that brought hmallet (from hereon now affectionally know as a "weapons grade cock end" - thanks and royalties to Vesuvius
) to us has posted as "cghobbs" - with one day and one post's history. Checking the forums section of the WGCE's site, under "not so serious stuff" (Im guessing that mpg and lino flooring are discussed at length on other parts of the forum) It seems that cghobbs manages the "Friday Fun" thread therein, and seems to be in regular contact with the WGCE.
So i have to ask - cghobbs, do you *know* this hmallet person?. Come on man, unmask the legend.
R.
Edited by M@verick on Tuesday 17th October 14:03
M@verick you super sleuth. I have been "lurking" on the Pistonheads forums for a while keeping up with the latest goings on. I found the site after a trip to Le Mans a few years back when I ended up camping next to the TVR guys from Pistonheads.
I feel like I have thrown a tennis ball into a hornets nest.
I have to admit I do know hmallett and have done for a number of years. WGCE (a quality new term I'm sure I will be using in the future) is a little harsh but has plenty of comedy value. I haven't seen the guy for a few years but check his blog from time to time. I thought the petrol station story would interest others so posted it here. I used to take similar care of my TVR and am sure I pissed off a number of people in a similar way. I just thought it was amusing to actually read about it from the 'pissed offs' point of view.
I feel like I have thrown a tennis ball into a hornets nest.
I have to admit I do know hmallett and have done for a number of years. WGCE (a quality new term I'm sure I will be using in the future) is a little harsh but has plenty of comedy value. I haven't seen the guy for a few years but check his blog from time to time. I thought the petrol station story would interest others so posted it here. I used to take similar care of my TVR and am sure I pissed off a number of people in a similar way. I just thought it was amusing to actually read about it from the 'pissed offs' point of view.
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