997 GT3 - Good News / Bad News
Discussion
please please don't let it be the squeeling excuse for a presenter driving, I doubt she'll even be able to see over the wheel... Mind you all Tiff does is thwack the cars sideways these days, which is pointless as who drives like that on road or track!!
The only reason I still watch this crap is they've still managed to hang on to the BTCC guru
Lets hope he gets the wheel...
The only reason I still watch this crap is they've still managed to hang on to the BTCC guru
Lets hope he gets the wheel... I see it now...
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
fidgits said:
I see it now...
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
You are SO hired.
Vesuvius 996 said:
fidgits said:
I see it now...
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
You are SO hired.
naaa.
I forgot to add...
Before cutting to the pufter who says something like "that looks like a cool car, i'd love one of those" before going back to the competition question.
Porsche is made in which country:
A. Germany
B. Atlantis
C. Mars
Calls only cost 5 quid per millisecond..
Where you can win a radio control 1/20th scale model of the 997GT3 (or maybe just the cheapest car they feature tonight and dont destroy)
before cutting to 6 minutes of adverts.
fidgits said:
.......Before cutting to the pufter who says something like "that looks like a cool car, i'd love one of those" before going back to the competition question.
Porsche is made in which country:
A. Germany
B. Atlantis
C. Mars
I don't think I'm going to be able to keep a straight face when they do the competition bit.
magic torch said:
Nope, they'll go to Ikea in it. Attempt to load a wardrobe into it, with some sort of comedy Laurel and Hardy scenario.
Then they'll try and off-road it, followed by how many lamp posts it can knock down whilst spinning on it's wing mirrors.
Tonight on Fifth Gear, Tiff tries to get his leg over VBH in the new GT3.
Will she feel a bit of a knob, or all of it?
Vesuvius 996 said:
magic torch said:
Nope, they'll go to Ikea in it. Attempt to load a wardrobe into it, with some sort of comedy Laurel and Hardy scenario.
Then they'll try and off-road it, followed by how many lamp posts it can knock down whilst spinning on it's wing mirrors.
Tonight on Fifth Gear, Tiff tries to get his leg over VBH in the new GT3.
Will she feel a bit of a knob, or all of it?
Oh yes, i forgot they were attempting to be 'original' (like taking a 159 to an italian restaraunt)...
And with that theme.. my money is Tiff parking the GT3 outside a comedy club, and they spend the entire thing talking about germans not having a sense of humour while getting glimpses of the car through the window...
fidgits said:
Vesuvius 996 said:
fidgits said:
I see it now...
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
Some overweight giggly bint and pufter they found asking for chance outside the cafe make some unfunny joke about 911's being for middle-aged bald people, and Tiff being middle aged and bald before cutting to said Tiff talking about the new 997 GT3 being focused at the 'driver' rather than city-boy...
Cue 2 minutes of the car powersliding around the same bend, with Tiff spending 20 seconds or so talking about a great turn in, wonderful handling and balance..
Cut to a 'to camera' piece, where he might, just might mention its price, and how its really a track day toy you can use everyday, if you can put up with the stiff suspension, before cutting to him wheelspinning away, and for bonus points, maybe, just maybe, sliding around that corner again.
You are SO hired.
naaa.
I forgot to add...
Before cutting to the pufter who says something like "that looks like a cool car, i'd love one of those" before going back to the competition question.
Porsche is made in which country:
A. Germany
B. Atlantis
C. Mars
Calls only cost 5 quid per millisecond..
Where you can win a radio control 1/20th scale model of the 997GT3 (or maybe just the cheapest car they feature tonight and dont destroy)
before cutting to 6 minutes of adverts.
Although the answers to the question could be improved for clarity. How about
Germany
Breeze Block
Fat boy Slim
It depressing really. How can they take something so simple (a programme about cars) and turn it into something so crappy. Be nice to see Tiff or hopefully Jason giving the GT3 the beans all the same. So I will be watching at 09.00 after I have recorded it so I can fast forward aqnd the filter the VHB dross.
On a final note, did anyone else think VBH going arse of tit and landing on her head whilst watersking was the funnest thing on TV since Norman Wisdon. Made me laugh and laugh and laugh. In fact I am still smiling at the very thought of it.
Andy
meno-porsche said:
On a final note, did anyone else think VBH going arse of tit and landing on her head whilst watersking was the funnest thing on TV since Norman Wisdon. Made me laugh and laugh and laugh. In fact I am still smiling at the very thought of it.
Andy
Considering the depth of the water and the speed she was travelling it it could have been deadly.
meno-porsche said:
On a final note, did anyone else think VBH going arse of tit and landing on her head whilst watersking was the funnest thing on TV since Norman Wisdon. Made me laugh and laugh and laugh. In fact I am still smiling at the very thought of it.
Andy
Oh, was that what it was?
I thought Greenpeace trying to get a beached whale back in the sea was a bit off-topic even for fifth gear...

Not looking good.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
Radio Times said:
Motoring magazine show. Can Jonny Smith set a new World Land Speed Record for a car fuelled by vegetable oil? Vicki Butler-Henderson investigates whether Porsche have found the ideal compromise between track and road cars. Tiff Needell visits Mercedes-Benz World to test their ML 63 AMG 4x4. Tom Ford drives the Mazda MX5 Roadster Coupe. Jason Plato tries to make money on a deal. Tim Lovejoy takes a celebrity banger-racing.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
magic torch said:
Not looking good.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
Radio Times said:
Motoring magazine show. Can Jonny Smith set a new World Land Speed Record for a car fuelled by vegetable oil? Vicki Butler-Henderson investigates whether Porsche have found the ideal compromise between track and road cars. Tiff Needell visits Mercedes-Benz World to test their ML 63 AMG 4x4. Tom Ford drives the Mazda MX5 Roadster Coupe. Jason Plato tries to make money on a deal. Tim Lovejoy bangs a celebrity.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
magic torch said:
Not looking good.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
Radio Times said:
Motoring magazine show. Can Jonny Smith set a new World Land Speed Record for a car fuelled by vegetable oil? Vicki Butler-Henderson investigates whether Porsche have found the ideal compromise between track and road cars. Tiff Needell visits Mercedes-Benz World to test their ML 63 AMG 4x4. Tom Ford drives the Mazda MX5 Roadster Coupe. Jason Plato tries to make money on a deal. Tim Lovejoy takes a celebrity banger-racing.
Told you, compromise means a trip to Ikea.
Looks like Jamie was right!
Mind you, my bet is if its VBH she see's if she can fit her arse and ego in the GT3 at the same time... and fails miserably...
Edited by fidgits on Monday 27th November 12:15
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