Consequences
Author
Discussion

Phil.

Original Poster:

5,538 posts

269 months

Yesterday (14:54)
quotequote all
I wasn’t sure whether to post this but my wife wanted to share her experience.

At 6pm on a Sunday a few weeks ago my wife received a call to say her brother had had a bike accident and she should drive to the hospital straight away as things didn’t look good.

Her brother was an experienced mature rider with several bikes and had ridden most of the UK and abroad. On this Sunday he was driven into at a notoriously dangerous junction by an elderly person. He flipped off the bike and landed on his head/neck.

A passerby performed CPR, the air ambulance attended and he was taken to hospital. I’m not going in to all the details but he snapped his spine at C2/C3 and is paralysed from the neck down. He is unable to breath without a ventilator, eat/drink, swallow etc. Think Christopher Reeve.

He has various other complications (and operations), remains highly unstable and things could go downhill rapidly at any time.
Having said that his personality remains and when conscious he is able to communicate by mouthing words, can joke, and enjoys watching sport on an iPad sometimes.

He was a larger than life person both physically and socially. You knew when he entered a room and he lived life to the fullest. His family was his main focus, as was the family business. He was hands on daily.

The reason for the post is mainly to share the impact on the family and to share some of things he should have done before the accident, which were discussed but were always put off.

He has a long-term partner who runs the business with him. The Monday after the accident, still in shock, she had to fill the gap he left. She lives in his house. Legally nothing is hers. Wills were discussed but nothing was put in place. If he had died (which may still happen) then she has nothing.

My wife and her family are in cycle of never ending grieving. Maybe the CPR shouldn’t have happened. He still doesn’t understand the finality of his predicament, being locked in an unmovable body never being able to eat/drink, move, or work again for the rest of his life.

The message from my wife is please put in place everything you need now to support your family should you have an accident or die. Get those wills in place, get some decent life insurance, and leave instructions for what should happen in any eventuality.

We all think it wont happen to us, but unbelievably in my wife’s case, it just has and the fall out and pain is unimaginable.

Thanks for reading.

Dog Star

17,104 posts

187 months

Yesterday (15:12)
quotequote all
Christ - this is my absolute dread scenario, the poor chap and his family. My heart goes out.

AKjr

618 posts

30 months

Yesterday (15:18)
quotequote all
I'm really sorry to hear this, for him, you and the wider family. frown


Esquire

373 posts

19 months

Yesterday (15:20)
quotequote all
Terrible news as previous poster says heart goes out.

We updated our wills last year and like your wife says its supper important.

I was recently very tempted to get another bike but sadly reading these type stories i've decided enough is enough

STe_rsv4

1,056 posts

117 months

Yesterday (15:42)
quotequote all
One of my worst fears is what has happened to your BIL. The very thought of being paralysed / unable to perform normal daily life makes me shudder.
I'm so sorry to hear what your family is going through, but yes you are absolutely right that plans should be in place should this type of thing happens.
I've probably been a bit selfish myself as I don't have a will or whatnot in place and myself and my wife have discussed this several times over the years but never gotten around to doing it.
Reading your story may have just sparked a bit of urgency on my behalf, so thank you for putting this out there, painful as it may be.

trickywoo

13,288 posts

249 months

Yesterday (15:49)
quotequote all
Can’t say I’m a fan of these negative posts in BB. It’s more relevant to GG or SPL.

Esquire

373 posts

19 months

Yesterday (16:22)
quotequote all
banghead
trickywoo said:
Can t say I m a fan of these negative posts in BB. It s more relevant to GG or SPL.

Inky81

293 posts

115 months

Yesterday (16:33)
quotequote all
trickywoo said:
Can t say I m a fan of these negative posts in BB. It s more relevant to GG or SPL.
Can't say I'm a fan of these inappropriate replies, but there you go.

Best wishes to your family OP. I was considering a Helite airvest. Your post has helped me make that decision.

ujio

406 posts

189 months

Yesterday (16:34)
quotequote all
Truly awful to hear. My deepest sympathies are with you Brother In Law and your family. So sorry to hear this mate.

But your post has hit home (as intended). I am in a similar situationship as your BIL and have been kicking the can down the road on the Will for too long now.... So I will ensure I get this sorted now so my dependents won't be left vulnerable.

God Bless.

trickywoo

13,288 posts

249 months

Yesterday (16:42)
quotequote all
Inky81 said:
Can't say I'm a fan of these inappropriate replies, but there you go.

Best wishes to your family OP. I was considering a Helite airvest. Your post has helped me make that decision.
How is it inappropriate to say that a competent biker getting knocked off by a geriatric car driver and leaving his affairs in disarray has no place in BB. Op can post what he likes it’s just not appropriate for BB. Put in in SPL.


trickywoo

13,288 posts

249 months

Yesterday (16:43)
quotequote all
Inky81 said:
Can't say I'm a fan of these inappropriate replies, but there you go.

Best wishes to your family OP. I was considering a Helite airvest. Your post has helped me make that decision.
Do you even normally post in BB?

Inky81

293 posts

115 months

Yesterday (16:54)
quotequote all
trickywoo said:
Do you even normally post in BB?
Douglas William Jerrold said:
Quality, not quantity, is my measure.

Biker9090

1,625 posts

56 months

Yesterday (16:54)
quotequote all
Sorry to hear it, my worst nightmare is ending up like that.

I hope they start throwing the book at these drivers who are clearly incapable of safely driving anymore. We effectively took the keys off several family members in the past due to this.

trickywoo

13,288 posts

249 months

Yesterday (16:57)
quotequote all
Inky81 said:
trickywoo said:
Do you even normally post in BB?
Douglas William Jerrold said:
Quality, not quantity, is my measure.
You’ve failed on that spectacularly.

Freakuk

4,212 posts

170 months

Yesterday (17:03)
quotequote all
A very close friend of mine was in the exact same position however he was out cycling in a sportif event and fell on some ice they think and broke his neck, luckily several other riders attended to him before being airlifted.

He was very well regarding within the mountain bike industry and we all raised thousands for his continued care. He was also unmarried but had lived with his partner for over 20 years so everything was complicated. They ended up getting married while he was still in hospital to ensure she was protected and he was bound to a wheelchair and needed 24/7 care at home due to his inability to breathe without ventilation etc.

He fought the system for several years before winning a legal case to allow his ventilation to be switched off and end his life on his terms.

PorkInsider

6,309 posts

160 months

Yesterday (18:14)
quotequote all
I know someone who suffered what sounds like a very similar injury from falling down a flight of concrete stairs.

Personally, it's hard to think I'd want to be 'saved' under those circumstances.

rlg43p

1,497 posts

268 months

Yesterday (18:26)
quotequote all
trickywoo said:
How is it inappropriate to say that a competent biker getting knocked off by a geriatric car driver and leaving his affairs in disarray has no place in BB. Op can post what he likes it s just not appropriate for BB. Put in in SPL.
What the fk does it matter whether it's in BB or SPL? Does any one really give a st?


Phil.

Original Poster:

5,538 posts

269 months

Yesterday (18:44)
quotequote all
rlg43p said:
trickywoo said:
How is it inappropriate to say that a competent biker getting knocked off by a geriatric car driver and leaving his affairs in disarray has no place in BB. Op can post what he likes it s just not appropriate for BB. Put in in SPL.
What the fk does it matter whether it's in BB or SPL? Does any one really give a st?
They are so triggered by my post that they sent me a DM complaining! Given the content of the post I found the DM inappropriate to say the least.

slopes

41,054 posts

206 months

Yesterday (19:03)
quotequote all
Phil. said:
rlg43p said:
trickywoo said:
How is it inappropriate to say that a competent biker getting knocked off by a geriatric car driver and leaving his affairs in disarray has no place in BB. Op can post what he likes it s just not appropriate for BB. Put in in SPL.
What the fk does it matter whether it's in BB or SPL? Does any one really give a st?
They are so triggered by my post that they sent me a DM complaining! Given the content of the post I found the DM inappropriate to say the least.
If something offends you that much, there is always the report function smile

Condolences for your BIL and fingers crossed he manages to survive even though his life is now irreovcably changed.

KurtFlew

500 posts

72 months

Yesterday (19:24)
quotequote all
I get Trickywoo's angle. Like me he's probably bored of being told how dangerous bikes are, and the condescending approach car only motorists use when telling you how dangerous they are 'thats why I'd never have one' blah blah blah.

Not saying the OP's post is one of those but we're all grown ups, make our own choices and don't need telling of the 'consequences'.