Geneva Show

[loach]

Hi guys - new to this area, though I'm getting a Land Rover Defender later in the year so may be back when it breaks in two and explodes. To keep a long story short, just back from the Geneva show - great time had by me and a few excellent PH compadres. I had asked Land Rover Switzerland for some VIP bits, and they arrived at home after I'd already left for the show.

So - if anyone's thinking of heading to Geneva, I have a pair of tickets to the show, and a VIP pass to Land Rover's snazzy restricted lounge where you can get as much beer/wine/crisps/nuts/soft drinks as tickles your fancy. There's a girl there at the gate - keep an eye out for her. Big face, but very attractive - like a really sexy balloon. Make sure you get to the Alfa stand, too. Woof woof. Though if you're looking for the full-on "I think I'm in there" experience, head over to BMW. Whilst you're there, ask for Lorenz, and if you're nice and a petrol-head, you'll get up to the BMW bar too.

PM me if you are definitely off to Geneva and would like the tickets/passes. I'll post 'em off to you FOC 'cos I'm nice.

Edited by loach on Sunday 11th March 16:35

[nervous]

loach said:

Hi guys - new to this area, though I'm getting a Land Rover Defender later in the year so may be back when it breaks in two and explodes. To keep a long story short, just back from the Geneva show - great time had by me and a few excellent PH compadres. I had asked Land Rover Switzerland for some VIP bits, and they arrived at home after I'd already left for the show.

So - if anyone's thinking of heading to Geneva, I have a pair of tickets to the show, and a VIP pass to Land Rover's snazzy restricted lounge where you can get as much beer/wine/crisps/nuts/soft drinks as tickles your fancy. There's a girl there at the gate - keep an eye out for her. Big face, but very attractive - like a really sexy balloon. Make sure you get to the Alfa stand, too. Woof woof. Though if you're looking for the full-on "I think I'm in there" experience, head over to BMW. Whilst you're there, ask for Lorenz, and if you're nice and a petrol-head, you'll get up to the BMW bar too.

PM me if you are definitely off to Geneva and would like the tickets/passes. I'll post 'em off to you FOC 'cos I'm nice.

Edited by loach on Sunday 11th March 16:35

looks like the gloves are really off now.

[loach]

nervous said:

looks like the gloves are really off now.

Well they're on again now, buddy, and I only had to sulk for about an hour to make it so.



So come on then, anyone on here ready for some comps? I tell you, there are worse things than looking out through the LR waterfall at the anoracked passers-by trying to climb aboard the locked Range Rovers, whilst you sip on a beer, guarded in your VIP cocoon guarded by a lovely Swiss bird with a face bigger than the threat of global warming. Top Tip - the French word for 'Face' is 'Visage', and the German word is 'Gesicht'. Might come in handy.

[magic torch]

That's a glovely gesture.

[nervous]

you can see why were so smitten with him cant you gang?

[wetwipe]

nervous said:

you can see why were so smitten with him cant you gang?

gloves off?

I think he may well have thrown down the gauntlett.......



















if only he knew where he put them

[loach]

wetwipe said:

nervous said:

you can see why were so smitten with him cant you gang?

gloves off?

I think he may well have thrown down the gauntlett.......



















if only he knew where he put them

I know exactly where I put them. No. No...not on that street. Please...just bear with me. Seriously...it's easy. Please. There's only one street in the town anywhere near your shop - that's the one I mean. No....that's a footpath. The other one. The big one without people on it. No - that's just a gutter. What? Well how many streets can you see? Two? What? None? Look out your f**king window you dozy cow. Yes. Yes. There. The one beside you with the traffic. No. Not there. Do you speak english? Well Australian then. What? No. Not sweet... Street. Yes. That one. No. Not that one. The other f**king one. The one with the cars on it. What? No. We have a bad connection....I'm up a mountain. Cars? What do you mean? The shiny effing boxes with the wheels on them.... you must have seen them in pictures.... Yes. On the roof. No. The roof. Yes. R-O-O-F. Of what? Ahh Sweet Jesus. Of the f**king car....What? No it just has one. No. You won't need a ladder.... *goes off to impale self on ski pole*



Edit - poor girl caught me at a bad moment. Never mind - got her a nice bottle of wine for her bother.

Edited by loach on Monday 12th March 00:34

[magic torch]

loach said:

I know exactly where I put them. No. No...not on that street. Please...just bear with me. Seriously...it's easy. Please. There's only one street in the town anywhere near your shop - that's the one I mean. No....that's a footpath. The other one. The big one without people on it. No - that's just a gutter. What? Well how many streets can you see? Two? What? None? Look out your f**king window you dozy cow. Yes. Yes. There. The one beside you with the traffic. No. Not there. Do you speak english? Well Australian then. What? No. Not sweet... Street. Yes. That one. No. Not that one. The other f**king one. The one with the cars on it. What? No. We have a bad connection....I'm up a mountain. Cars? What do you mean? The shiny effing boxes with the wheels on them.... you must have seen them in pictures.... Yes. On the roof. No. The roof. Yes. R-O-O-F. Of what? Ahh Sweet Jesus. Of the f**king car....What? No it just has one. No. You won't need a ladder.... *goes off to impale self on ski pole*



Edit - poor girl caught me at a bad moment. Never mind - got her a nice bottle of wine for her bother.

Edited by loach on Monday 12th March 00:34

Now I've got the dialogue to go with the arm swinging and feet stamping..

[wetwipe]

magic torch said:

loach said:

I know exactly where I put them. No. No...not on that street. Please...just bear with me. Seriously...it's easy. Please. There's only one street in the town anywhere near your shop - that's the one I mean. No....that's a footpath. The other one. The big one without people on it. No - that's just a gutter. What? Well how many streets can you see? Two? What? None? Look out your f**king window you dozy cow. Yes. Yes. There. The one beside you with the traffic. No. Not there. Do you speak english? Well Australian then. What? No. Not sweet... Street. Yes. That one. No. Not that one. The other f**king one. The one with the cars on it. What? No. We have a bad connection....I'm up a mountain. Cars? What do you mean? The shiny effing boxes with the wheels on them.... you must have seen them in pictures.... Yes. On the roof. No. The roof. Yes. R-O-O-F. Of what? Ahh Sweet Jesus. Of the f**king car....What? No it just has one. No. You won't need a ladder.... *goes off to impale self on ski pole*



Edit - poor girl caught me at a bad moment. Never mind - got her a nice bottle of wine for her bother.

Edited by loach on Monday 12th March 00:34

Now I've got the dialogue to go with the arm swinging and feet stamping..

it was a moment of pure comic genius. i thought we were skiing with basil fawlty

[loach]

Everyone's a comedian. This is typical. Absolutely typical. Well let me tell you something - this is exactly how Nazi Germany started. A lot of layabouts with nothing better to do than to cause trouble.

:|

[wetwipe]

loach said:

Everyone's a comedian. This is typical. Absolutely typical. Well let me tell you something - this is exactly how Nazi Germany started. A lot of layabouts with nothing better to do than to cause trouble.

:|

welcome to the firm chum

[sleep envy]

WHORE!

[loach]

sleep envy said:

WHORE!

We didn't even hold hands.


Honest.


And they talked about you the whole time.

[sleep envy]

[magic torch]

loach said:

sleep envy said:

WHORE!

We didn't even hold hands.


Honest.


And they talked about you the whole time.

PERVERT!

[loach]

magic torch said:

PERVERT!

Semantics. That activity is legal in Switzerland. Hell - I think it's compulsory.

[nervous]

loach said:

Switzerland: Hell

tidied that up for you.

ps essex is shit but still not as shit as geneva

[loach]

nervous said:

loach said:

Switzerland: Hell

tidied that up for you.

ps essex is shit but still not as shit as geneva

Thanks for that. The people that live there call it Schweiz. It can't be a coincidence that that rhymes with c*nt.