Best Excuse ever for non attendance at work
Discussion
We have a very stunning late 20's girl/woman working here, my phone rang at 9:01 this morning, it was her on the phone saying.
"I'm not sure what time I'm going to get to work today" so I asked her what the problem was "You promise not to tell anyone, well my boyfriend and I were mucking around in bed last night and we're handcuffed to the metal bedhead and the key has broken off in the lock and we are both stuck. I've called a locksmith and he will be here within the hour"
So I asked her to repeat what she had said (while I put it on speakerphone)
Much hilarity at my end, then she capped it with "and I'm dying for a pee"
How can you get angry with an excuse like that
"I'm not sure what time I'm going to get to work today" so I asked her what the problem was "You promise not to tell anyone, well my boyfriend and I were mucking around in bed last night and we're handcuffed to the metal bedhead and the key has broken off in the lock and we are both stuck. I've called a locksmith and he will be here within the hour"
So I asked her to repeat what she had said (while I put it on speakerphone)
Much hilarity at my end, then she capped it with "and I'm dying for a pee"
How can you get angry with an excuse like that
boyse7en said:
How was he going to get into the house to release them?
I've just asked her (I hadn't thought of it) front door wasn't locked, locksmith didn't charge her for releasing them, said the story was worth moreMind you she is the lady we put in charge of our new franking machine, as this was her first responsibility after she had been shown by the engineer how it worked, she very proudly showed me how to operate it by placing a sheet of A4 paper in the franking machine and putting three 1st class "franks" on it.
I told her to stop as it was costing us money, her response "No it can't cost you anything because I haven't posted anything"
Just as well she looks good
For some reason, the franking machine tale reminds me of this old classic joke 
Three women go for a job interview.
The man interviewing them posed all three the same question.
"What would you do if you found an extra £50 in your pay that you shouldn’t have received?"
The first one said, “I’d give it back as it wasn’t mine and I wasn’t entitled to it.”
When he asked the second, she replied, “I’d give it to Charity.”
When he asked the third one, she was more honest and she said, “I’d keep it for myself and go out for a drink.”
Which of the three women got the job?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The one with the biggest tits!

Three women go for a job interview.
The man interviewing them posed all three the same question.
"What would you do if you found an extra £50 in your pay that you shouldn’t have received?"
The first one said, “I’d give it back as it wasn’t mine and I wasn’t entitled to it.”
When he asked the second, she replied, “I’d give it to Charity.”
When he asked the third one, she was more honest and she said, “I’d keep it for myself and go out for a drink.”
Which of the three women got the job?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The one with the biggest tits!
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