Upset my neighbour yesterday, was I wrong?
Discussion
mikeiow said:
Sadly, this makes you the knob.
Sure, he was out of order with his manner…but…..he’s an old man. Cutting him some slack is not you losing, it is you being a gracious human to someone who has lived a long life.
Just do it.
This is all the feedback you need. Read it and ruminate on it. Nobody in their 90’s is playing with a full deck. I deal with the extreme elderly on a daily basis, he’s mobile and is trying his best. Whether he’s right or wrong isn’t the issue. Treat him with respect, say sorry and get on with your life.Sure, he was out of order with his manner…but…..he’s an old man. Cutting him some slack is not you losing, it is you being a gracious human to someone who has lived a long life.
Just do it.
Hammersia said:
Orange block is my drive. Yellow block is his drive. Green block is public highway (cul de sac).
Bin day.
I was having some professional house photos done in the morning so I moved my bins from the blue dots to the orange dots (ie public highway).
Was going to be temporary but photographer was trying to catch the sun when it was out, so the bins were in the highway for an hour or so while we went in and out to do internal photos.
Came back outside after an hour (sun arrived) and my bins had been put back on my drive.
My neighbour, we will call him Cyril, (92 years old), immediately came up to me, very in my face, said "I'm not happy, had to move your bins out of my driveway, you blocked me in".
Eh? I brushed him off relatively brusquely if I'm honest, he is a bit of a whinger at the best of times, but I thought he was being unreasonable.
I believe that his complaint can only be that the temporary bin position, on the corner, made him swing his "small" car out another two feet to get round them. I don't believe the bins were in line with his drive.
Was I in the wrong?
At 92 I would let it slide and even try and show some respect to him as my elder. Obvs he might just be a knob but he’s 92 so it’s just nice to be nice and be the best you can. Bin day.
I was having some professional house photos done in the morning so I moved my bins from the blue dots to the orange dots (ie public highway).
Was going to be temporary but photographer was trying to catch the sun when it was out, so the bins were in the highway for an hour or so while we went in and out to do internal photos.
Came back outside after an hour (sun arrived) and my bins had been put back on my drive.
My neighbour, we will call him Cyril, (92 years old), immediately came up to me, very in my face, said "I'm not happy, had to move your bins out of my driveway, you blocked me in".
Eh? I brushed him off relatively brusquely if I'm honest, he is a bit of a whinger at the best of times, but I thought he was being unreasonable.
I believe that his complaint can only be that the temporary bin position, on the corner, made him swing his "small" car out another two feet to get round them. I don't believe the bins were in line with his drive.
Was I in the wrong?
Hol said:
You don’t believe you blocked him, but on the other hand he had to swerve 2ft to get by the bins.
I’m not convinced that’s a slam dunk.
Swerve a whole 2'? Should the OP have left his bins on the road? No. Has it ruined the oldster's life or prevented him completing his vital mission to buy Werther's Originals and collect his pension? No. He was slightly inconvenienced and felt the need to put the OP's bins back on his drive.I’m not convinced that’s a slam dunk.
I fell out with the local busybody a few years back, he was moaning about parking because I'd parked near his house on a piece of road he's a bit possessive about for some reason. Not blocking him in, not making it difficult for anybody he just doesn't want cars parked in the road because, as he told me within half an hour of us moving in 'we don't have cars parked on the road here'. Anyway I was a bit rude to the old sod and we've barely spoken since which suits me very nicely thank you!
hidetheelephants said:
Hol said:
You don’t believe you blocked him, but on the other hand he had to swerve 2ft to get by the bins.
I’m not convinced that’s a slam dunk.
Swerve a whole 2'? Should the OP have left his bins on the road? No. Has it ruined the oldster's life or prevented him completing his vital mission to buy Werther's Originals and collect his pension? No. He was slightly inconvenienced and felt the need to put the OP's bins back on his drive.I’m not convinced that’s a slam dunk.
My viewpoint remains the same as my first comment. Irrespective of how toxic the neighbour has been over the previous years, IF the OP deliberately provoked him into the conflict, then he is just as small a person.
Nothing about age, or how easy it would be swerve round the bins.
It’s about NOT being a dick.
Hol said:
It’s one thing to criticise a neighbour for constantly moaning about nothing, but if you deliberately blocked him from going out in his car without saying anything before hand then it’s a totally different scenario and I’d be pissed off so well.
Edited by Hol on Saturday 6th April 06:27
Hondashark said:
Just bide your time. Took 9 years for my neighbor to be stuck in a home but we've had 3 peaceful years now while her house sits empty. Age wins.
And then Stony Tony moves in. An alcoholic single man with a small inheritance (hence why he buys it without a mortgage) and mental health issues. Poor old bloke, you wound him up, as others have said, make his day with a tin of biscuits and some tea bags.
When you get old things tend to get blown out of all proportion.
He wont be around much longer, a few years from now and you get some pirrocks moving in you will wish he was still a neighbour.
I have one of those pirrocks, parks their car on my drive and says 'won't be long'.
When you get old things tend to get blown out of all proportion.
He wont be around much longer, a few years from now and you get some pirrocks moving in you will wish he was still a neighbour.
I have one of those pirrocks, parks their car on my drive and says 'won't be long'.
hidetheelephants said:
Swerve a whole 2'? Should the OP have left his bins on the road? No. Has it ruined the oldster's life or prevented him completing his vital mission to buy Werther's Originals and collect his pension? No. He was slightly inconvenienced and felt the need to put the OP's bins back on his drive.
Yeah, I don't think anyone deserves respect when they're being a knob. If he's having troubles diving around bins perhaps his driving should be reassessed.Gassing Station | Homes, Gardens and DIY | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff