Noisy Cockerel

Author
Discussion

oilydan

Original Poster:

2,030 posts

272 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Bit of a predicament here as none of your traditional measures are available...

A bloody cockerel from our neighbors house across the road is crowing as early as 4am, earsplittingly loud, every 15 seconds.

We are in Dubai so actually talking to them is a no-go. They are very 'local' and will not listen to expats - tried before and the response is "if you don't like it, go home"

No airguns on the market here either.

I have thought of putting a trail of oats from their gate out into the road, but have a funny feeling it would eat them all and run away with a 'meep meep' as I hurtle down the road in my Acme steamroller.

Don't want to lay poison as there are kids who play nearby.

What to do PH?


blindswelledrat

25,257 posts

233 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
If you can't talk to them and you can't kill it then you are pretty fked.
THis thread is akin to saying "Help- I want to run a marathon but I don't have any legs or arms and Ive tried to crawl llike a wounded soldier using my cock but it gets too tired. WHat can I do without cheating?"

frontbum

5,392 posts

160 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
Help- I want to run a marathon but I don't have any legs or arms and Ive tried to crawl llike a wounded soldier using my cock but it gets too tired.
rofl

BMWBen

4,899 posts

202 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
oilydan said:
Bit of a predicament here as none of your traditional measures are available...

A bloody cockerel from our neighbors house across the road is crowing as early as 4am, earsplittingly loud, every 15 seconds.

We are in Dubai so actually talking to them is a no-go. They are very 'local' and will not listen to expats - tried before and the response is "if you don't like it, go home"

No airguns on the market here either.

I have thought of putting a trail of oats from their gate out into the road, but have a funny feeling it would eat them all and run away with a 'meep meep' as I hurtle down the road in my Acme steamroller.

Don't want to lay poison as there are kids who play nearby.

What to do PH?

Oh boo-bloody-hoo, at least you don't get woken by magpies fighting crows...

V8mate

45,899 posts

190 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
BMWBen said:
at least you don't get woken by magpies fighting crows...
Awesome! Film it and post it up.

I love magpies. They keep my garden clear of pigeons and squirrels.

Terisis

131 posts

159 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Buy a hawk

Train hawk to predate on chickens

Get up early, say 3.45am, and show hawk its breakfast

Problem solved

HTH

XJSJohn

15,966 posts

220 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
bird feed and baking soda perhaps ???

blindswelledrat

25,257 posts

233 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Terisis said:
Buy a hawk

Train hawk to predate on chickens

Get up early, say 3.45am, and show hawk its breakfast

Problem solved

HTH
I don't really understand this post.
Either it's supposed to be a joke, which I doubt given it's content or else its supposed to be a genuine suggestion,which I doubt given it's content.
Which leaves me totally bewildered as to what it might be.

oilydan

Original Poster:

2,030 posts

272 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
BMWBen said:
Oh boo-bloody-hoo, at least you don't get woken by magpies fighting crows...
Oh boo-bloody-hoo, at least you can buy an air gun and have fun murdering them. smile

MOTORVATOR

6,993 posts

248 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
Terisis said:
Buy a hawk

Train hawk to predate on chickens

Get up early, say 3.45am, and show hawk its breakfast

Problem solved

HTH
I don't really understand this post.
Either it's supposed to be a joke, which I doubt given it's content or else its supposed to be a genuine suggestion,which I doubt given it's content.
Which leaves me totally bewildered as to what it might be.
I think he was struggling with the rephasing so it didn't come out as "train it to like cock". I can understand, could have got really messy biggrin

oilydan

Original Poster:

2,030 posts

272 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Yeah, you'd be hard pressed to find a local bird here that would openly like to gobble a cock.

Hawks are pretty expensive here too. About GBP200K for a decent one. I'd probably be best trying the steamroller approach TBH.

blindswelledrat

25,257 posts

233 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
oilydan said:
Yeah, you'd be hard pressed to find a local bird here that would openly like to gobble a cock.

Hawks are pretty expensive here too. About GBP200K for a decent one. I'd probably be best trying the steamroller approach TBH.
£200 000 for a bird? Are you sure?
Even if true, how would you even know that?

ChairsWithHairs

23,902 posts

195 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Earplugs, good ones there was a thread here on them

Heathwood

2,538 posts

203 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
Sounds to me like your neighbour has already explained your options.

Alternatively, although a bit extreme, could you move? Do you rent? If so, do you have a landlord you could speak with?

Failing that, earplugs it is.

oilydan

Original Poster:

2,030 posts

272 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
blindswelledrat said:
oilydan said:
Yeah, you'd be hard pressed to find a local bird here that would openly like to gobble a cock.

Hawks are pretty expensive here too. About GBP200K for a decent one. I'd probably be best trying the steamroller approach TBH.
£200 000 for a bird? Are you sure?
Even if true, how would you even know that?
I used to fly model aircraft where they trained them, once had a guy stop by with about a million quisa worth of birds in the car. Big money out here for hunting birds.

BMWBen

4,899 posts

202 months

Monday 9th May 2011
quotequote all
oilydan said:
BMWBen said:
Oh boo-bloody-hoo, at least you don't get woken by magpies fighting crows...
Oh boo-bloody-hoo, at least you can buy an air gun and have fun murdering them. smile
Good point! biggrin