Donut question
Author
Discussion

BliarOut

Original Poster:

72,863 posts

261 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
I know at first this might look like a General Gassing question, but rumour has it, the BiB are donut experts, so it's in here.

I bought a selection of Safeway's finest cream donuts tonight. They were to be the grand finale of a night of passion.

The eclair was stupendous, the custardy one was equally nice

Come the glorious donut moment I was horrified to discover the nicest looking super high cholestorol one had apple secreted underneath the lashings of cream.

FFS, I don't like apple. If I wanted fruit, I would have bought it. I was on a mission to ingest artery hardening amounts of cholestorol in the most compact form possible.

On the back it does mention one has apple in ... in itsy bitsy teeny writing

Devastated I was. Do you think I should complain?

What is the BiB perspective on this heinous donut offence? Indeed, do I have grounds for prosecution for malicious apple concealment?

WMHV70

13,252 posts

262 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
Probably. My personal favourite is the "Dunkin' Donuts" Boston Kreme. Regular doughnut, no hole, middle filled with that yummy vanilla custard instead. Trouble is, there's not a DD within 50 miles of here! I usually have to wait till I go to the States!

(Which I appreciate is more than 50 miles, but it's better than Manchester!)

BliarOut

Original Poster:

72,863 posts

261 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
WMHV70 said:
Probably. My personal favourite is the "Dunkin' Donuts" Boston Kreme. Regular doughnut, no hole, middle filled with that yummy vanilla custard instead. Trouble is, there's not a DD within 50 miles of here! I usually have to wait till I go to the States!

(Which I appreciate is more than 50 miles, but it's better than Manchester!)


Shame you didn't get any donuts on shift today.... You could have had the offending item and had it "forensically examined" or whatever it is you Bib do with them

It's caramel donuts for me... Oh the sugar rush

Mr Friendly

67 posts

262 months

Friday 28th May 2004
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Call me old fashoined but I prefer a plain old raspberry jam filled doughnut

streaky

19,311 posts

271 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
Apple "doughnuts" should be long and straight, not round ... that's how you tell the difference.

And they should be filled with stewed apple with chunks in (like Mother used to make), not some puree injected through a syringe.

Raspberry doughnuts should have raspberry conserve (with small pieces of raspberry and real seeds) in them, and the raspberry should liberally coat the inside of the doughnut, not be a guey mass in one spot.

And the raspberry should NOT squirt out of the hole when you bite into the other side ... unless you want that to happen!

IMHO IE,
Streaky

Don

28,378 posts

306 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
And when I clicked on this thread I thought I was going to read something about getting full lock on, switching off the traction control, three quarters revs and dumping the clutch...

puggit

49,425 posts

270 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
Apple is for turnover, like jam/custard is for donught.

It's not hard, get it right please.

This was a party donught broadcast on behalf of PistonHeads

DJFish

6,008 posts

285 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
WARNING!

You should NEVER re-heat donuts in a microwave, otherwise super-heated red hot jam erupts from the centre and causes semi permanent facial scarring......

Alledgedly....

puggit

49,425 posts

270 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
DJFish said:
WARNING!

You should NEVER re-heat donuts in a microwave, otherwise super-heated red hot jam erupts from the centre and causes semi permanent facial scarring......

Alledgedly....
Just ask Gorbechov

DustyC

12,820 posts

276 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
What a thread!

I thought this was going to be about the legality of turn smoking type donuts but it turned out to be far more useful!

pdV6

16,442 posts

283 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
See here

mcflurry

9,184 posts

275 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
streaky said:
Apple "doughnuts" should be long and straight, not round ... that's how you tell the difference.

And they should be filled with stewed apple with chunks in (like Mother used to make), not some puree injected through a syringe.

Raspberry doughnuts should have raspberry conserve (with small pieces of raspberry and real seeds) in them, and the raspberry should liberally coat the inside of the doughnut, not be a guey mass in one spot.

And the raspberry should NOT squirt out of the hole when you bite into the other side ... unless you want that to happen!

IMHO IE,
Streaky





(got caught out with an apple one too - not happy, so had to have a Pie for my dinner to make myself feel better )

Mr2Mike

20,143 posts

277 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
DJFish said:
WARNING!

You should NEVER re-heat donuts in a microwave, otherwise super-heated red hot jam erupts from the centre and causes semi permanent facial scarring......

Alledgedly....


Not to mention turning them into something that has the consistency of a tyre

slinksport

15,704 posts

271 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
Legend has it, the Krispy Kreme (sp??) is THE donut..

Only available in harrods as far as I know, but each one has the same fat content as TWO big macs..

pdV6

16,442 posts

283 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
slinksport said:
Legend has it, the Krispy Kreme (sp??) is THE donut..

Only available in harrods as far as I know, but each one has the same fat content as TWO big macs..


As I just said:

pdV6 said:

See here

BliarOut

Original Poster:

72,863 posts

261 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
mmmmmmmmmmmm That is pure donut porn!!!

Now I definitely think I have grounds to prosecute for malicious apple concealment After seeing those honeys, I suddenly feel very insignificant

Wacky Racer

40,516 posts

269 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
You wouldn't buy donuts if you knew how they put the holes in them!!!.......

BliarOut

Original Poster:

72,863 posts

261 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
Wacky Racer said:
You wouldn't buy donuts if you knew how they put the holes in them!!!.......


That was the whole purpose of buying them for last night's erotic extravaganza

streaky

19,311 posts

271 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
In the late '80s, I was briefly on board a pipe-laying barge (DON'T ASK, OK?), I remember a man-mountain (6'8" whichever way you measured him) with a broom-handle threaded through a pile of chocolate-coated doughnuts (you couldn't see the broom handle). In his other hand he held a mug of tea the size of a "guzunder" ... and that was just "elevenses" for him! - Streaky

streaky

19,311 posts

271 months

Friday 28th May 2004
quotequote all
puggit said:
Apple is for turnover, like jam/custard is for donught.

It's not hard, get it right please.
NOT TRUE! The custard at school WAS hard! - Streaky