Sex clinic visit (lol)
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Discussion

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

284 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
The doctors don't/won't do the coil. Or something.
She calls this place the clap clinic, it's usually filled with chavs. Apparently.

I'm pretending to walk with elephantitus of the testicles.
This is funny. She says it is not.

Who is right?
I'd post or say more, but can't say more for the tears...

Shaw Tarse

31,885 posts

232 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
She has taken you to be "checked"
And...

The Nur

9,168 posts

214 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
Shaw Tarse said:
shudder

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

284 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
Shaw Tarse said:
She has taken you to be "checked"
And...
Well...
Rightly or wrongly, I will walk out of here with elephantitus of the testicles! hehe

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

284 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
Shaw Tarse said:
She has taken you to be "checked"
And...
I'm extreemly wise, and hundreds of years old (in dog years) ... It's amusing, to my small mind irked

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

284 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
Why do women who live nearby walk through the clap clinic car park short cut, to shave mere seconds off their walk, and raise their eyebrows at the innocent occupiers of various cars, like myself!?

rich1231

17,340 posts

289 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
Mobsta said:
Why do women who live nearby walk through the clap clinic car park short cut, to shave mere seconds off their walk, and raise their eyebrows at the innocent occupiers of various cars, like myself!?
Probably they are surprised at seeing the huge cock sitting at the wheel of a car?

David87

7,017 posts

241 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
I watched Embarrassing Bodies last week and the tiny umbrella up the willy hole thing is wrong. It's more of a cotton bud up the willy hole. Enjoy.thumbup

Ki3r

8,830 posts

188 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
David87 said:
I watched Embarrassing Bodies last week and the tiny umbrella up the willy hole thing is wrong. It's more of a cotton bud up the willy hole. Enjoy.thumbup
He still didn't enjoy it!

Ultuous

2,291 posts

220 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
David87 said:
the tiny umbrella up the willy hole thing is wrong. It's more of a cotton bud up the willy hole. Enjoy.thumbup
yes... Pulled out at an angle using some slight sideways force just to amuse the medical professional with the resulting loud pop - after all, they have to have something to brighten up their day - some of the sights are enough to be put off rhubarb crumble for life! wink

SC7

1,882 posts

210 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
David87 said:
I watched Embarrassing Bodies last week and the tiny umbrella up the willy hole thing is wrong. It's more of a cotton bud up the willy hole. Enjoy.thumbup
yes

Since I had a check years ago, I've heard the umbrella reference loads of times and assumed I just got lucky with the small bud thing.

mat13

1,977 posts

210 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
SC7 said:
yes

Since I had a check years ago, I've heard the umbrella reference loads of times and assumed I just got lucky with the small bud thing.
Still sounds bloody painfull!

jackthelad1984

845 posts

210 months

Monday 26th September 2011
quotequote all
mat13 said:
SC7 said:
yes

Since I had a check years ago, I've heard the umbrella reference loads of times and assumed I just got lucky with the small bud thing.
Still sounds bloody painfull!
not painful as such, just the most uncomfortable feeling ever!!

Blown2CV

31,597 posts

232 months

Tuesday 27th September 2011
quotequote all
jackthelad1984 said:
mat13 said:
SC7 said:
yes

Since I had a check years ago, I've heard the umbrella reference loads of times and assumed I just got lucky with the small bud thing.
Still sounds bloody painfull!
not painful as such, just the most uncomfortable feeling ever!!
i imagine the amount that it hurts depends on what condition it is in!

williamp

20,378 posts

302 months

Tuesday 27th September 2011
quotequote all
(serious for a moment)

I cant help but feel the myth about the Umberella has done a lot of damage: how many men are in fear of this and not gone for a check up, with potentially life changing or fatal consequences due to them not checking anything sooner...

There is no stigma about women checking themselves, yet there still is about men

Stevenj214

4,941 posts

257 months

Wednesday 28th September 2011
quotequote all
williamp said:
(serious for a moment)

I cant help but feel the myth about the Umberella has done a lot of damage: how many men are in fear of this and not gone for a check up, with potentially life changing or fatal consequences due to them not checking anything sooner...

There is no stigma about women checking themselves, yet there still is about men
On my latest visit, they did all the tests through blood and urine only.

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

284 months

Thursday 29th September 2011
quotequote all
rich1231 said:
Mobsta said:
Why do women who live nearby walk through the clap clinic car park short cut, to shave mere seconds off their walk, and raise their eyebrows at the innocent occupiers of various cars, like myself!?
Probably they are surprised at seeing the huge cock sitting at the wheel of a car?
Is that a probably, or are you trying to swing wangers with ph folk again, grunt? smile

YesItsARover

2,726 posts

194 months

Thursday 29th September 2011
quotequote all
Blown2CV said:
i imagine the amount that it hurts depends on what condition it is in!
It is painful.

Blown2CV

31,597 posts

232 months

Thursday 29th September 2011
quotequote all
YesItsARover said:
Blown2CV said:
i imagine the amount that it hurts depends on what condition it is in!
It is painful.
I know. If you have a STI, it might be worse.

YesItsARover

2,726 posts

194 months

Thursday 29th September 2011
quotequote all
Sorry, was trying to quote all but it didn't work on this phone.

I went to the clinic. The incomprehensible nurse kissed her teeth and asked if it was my first time.
The answer being yes, another teeth-kisser was bought in.

This one was to hold me down. The pulled the old boy's coat back, had a look around, then jammed what can only be described as a scaffold pole down my tube.

I know the waiting room heard me, the other chaps all looked very sheepish when I walked back through to get out of the torture chamber. Never again.