Wedge Owners Revamp !
Discussion
Wedge Owners Revamp.
I am really surprised the topic‘ Top Wedge! Top Physique?’ has touched a nerve with so many Wedge owners, that I am beginning to think some of you may indeed need a revamp. Though I can see a few are putting in an effort, the majority are lacking enthusiasm on the fitness front. We all know that the basis of a good Wedge is a sound chassis and I guess the same applies to the owners. It’s the foundations that matter. Completing a nut and bolt rebuild on your Wedge is only half the story. We need the owners 100% fit, and to achieve this here are some recommendations.
1. Join a Gym.
2. Give up the beer. (lifting glasses of beer is not exercise, unless you are lifting the whole barrel)
3. Give up smoking. (you wouldn’t like it if your TVR smoked)!
4. Eat healthy. (preferably only vegetables.)
5. No late nights.
6. Tell the Mrs. you have a head ache and try resting. (bed room department = stress)
7. Start using coffee based shampoo. (stops hair thinning)
8. Dye- based shampoo for those who are greying.
9. Wear modern designer clothes.
10. Listen to modern music. (pretend you enjoy it even if you don’t)
Before long you will be a new man, and those around you will indeed notice the difference. Come next summer, you will be proud to show off your TVR Wedge and your new, healthy, modern look. At the next festival you’ll be coming over to shake my hand and thank me for the inspiration I have given you. Remember high blood pressure is not going to do you any favours on a track day, and god forbid if you were to croak it behind the wheel it would make a right mess of the Wedge. After all, what’s it all for if we are not here to enjoy it. As the King once said ‘It’s Now or Never’.
I am really surprised the topic‘ Top Wedge! Top Physique?’ has touched a nerve with so many Wedge owners, that I am beginning to think some of you may indeed need a revamp. Though I can see a few are putting in an effort, the majority are lacking enthusiasm on the fitness front. We all know that the basis of a good Wedge is a sound chassis and I guess the same applies to the owners. It’s the foundations that matter. Completing a nut and bolt rebuild on your Wedge is only half the story. We need the owners 100% fit, and to achieve this here are some recommendations.
1. Join a Gym.
2. Give up the beer. (lifting glasses of beer is not exercise, unless you are lifting the whole barrel)
3. Give up smoking. (you wouldn’t like it if your TVR smoked)!
4. Eat healthy. (preferably only vegetables.)
5. No late nights.
6. Tell the Mrs. you have a head ache and try resting. (bed room department = stress)
7. Start using coffee based shampoo. (stops hair thinning)
8. Dye- based shampoo for those who are greying.
9. Wear modern designer clothes.
10. Listen to modern music. (pretend you enjoy it even if you don’t)
Before long you will be a new man, and those around you will indeed notice the difference. Come next summer, you will be proud to show off your TVR Wedge and your new, healthy, modern look. At the next festival you’ll be coming over to shake my hand and thank me for the inspiration I have given you. Remember high blood pressure is not going to do you any favours on a track day, and god forbid if you were to croak it behind the wheel it would make a right mess of the Wedge. After all, what’s it all for if we are not here to enjoy it. As the King once said ‘It’s Now or Never’.
Lean Machine said:
8. Dye- based shampoo for those who are greying.
Joking or otherwise, I can't think of many things more vain (or pointless) than a bloke dying his hair. Women tell me mine looks 'distinguished', however what they do not EVER say is 'You look distinguished, fancy a shag?' 
wooly350i said:
Hi Ho,were you the short fat balding chap at bbwf this year that kept trouser trumping then walking away?
..Classic!!Well im not sure if your not having a mid-life crisis?..Has the missus been eyeing up younger men?..Have you had a bit of a scare with the ole ticker?..Lets face it mate getting old sucks especially when your 80+ and have no teeth and unfortunately we are all going to get old and sooner or later snuff it..I have given up smoking after thirty years but have started drinking again..(I blame the rusty)..I try to eat veg with my main meal, Does shoving an apple in a pigs mouth before roasting it count?..I dont have 5 a day,Two poos a day is enough for me..I think dyed grey hair looks like a wig and i cant afford designer clothes as all my money goes on the wedge..Shampoo is for hair..Coffee is for drinking..Although the next time im in london and go for coffee i will ask for a wet chilled latte and tip it over my head to see if it makes a difference..It will probably get me kicked out and barred..
..I already listen to modern music..(Being a musician)..I cant join a gym as i have a ruptured vein in my stomach so any lifting of weights would cause it to burst and me to drown in my own blood..All i can advise is dont accept you are getting old as then it is all down hill..There is no such thing as growing old gracefully..It certainly is no fun when you tell the local pesky kids to naff off and they shout out come on then grandad..
..(Air rifle comes out)..Hopefully i have at least 15 years left of driving the wedge and when the time comes i will drive it off the cliffs of dover listening to vera lynn singing.."There'll be blue birds over the white cliffs of dover" shouting out "Is tea ready mum..cos im on me way home"..Knowing my luck the tide will be in and ill land like a surf board and end up in france...NNNNOOOOO...
Jonny weggie said:
1 - gym, done.
2 - beer, stopped.
3 - smoking, stopped.
4 - eating healthy, try'd it.
5 - bed by 9pm.
6 - headache every night.
7 - stopped coffee, now on water.
8 - hair none to dye.
9 - wearing latex.
10 - still listening to good music.
11 - Funeral, Friday 13th, - The Wife...
2 - beer, stopped.
3 - smoking, stopped.
4 - eating healthy, try'd it.
5 - bed by 9pm.
6 - headache every night.
7 - stopped coffee, now on water.
8 - hair none to dye.
9 - wearing latex.
10 - still listening to good music.
11 - Funeral, Friday 13th, - The Wife...
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