To our resident BiB

[Deester]

I had a chat with a friend the other day about stupid things people do while driving.

I recall seeing on the news quite a long time ago now, a guy driving on the M25 eating a bowl of melon with a spoon. The bowl was between his legs. Nutter.

Do our BiB have any tales of multi-tasking whilst in command of a vehicle?

[mcflurry]

Deester said:

I recall seeing on the news quite a long time ago now, a guy driving on the M25 eating a bowl of melon with a spoon. The bowl was between his legs. Nutter.

How else are you supposed to eat Melon whilst driving

[t-c]

I had a guy who stopped in lane three of the M4 to have a picnic. He had his picnic table out, the hamper was emptied and he and his wife were tucking into their food on one of the busiest sections of the M4 at that between junctions 8/9 and 7 eastbound!

[streaky]

mcflurry said:

Deester said: I recall seeing on the news quite a long time ago now, a guy driving on the M25 eating a bowl of melon with a spoon. The bowl was between his legs. Nutter. How else are you supposed to eat Melon whilst driving

Stupid mcflurry, you hold the ends of the melon (especially if the water variety) with both hands in front of your face. This has the added advantage that Truvelos cannot identify the driver.

You steer with your knees (that's why you can't put the bowl between your legs!).

Of course, if you are a really clever Dick ...

Streaky

[Dibble]

Deester said:

Do our BiB have any tales of multi-tasking whilst in command of a vehicle?

Giving commentary while ground commander in pursuit, while at the same time having to think where to deploy stinger units because comms room staff are pants in a crisis?

[Deester]

t-c said:

I had a guy who stopped in lane three of the M4 to have a picnic. He had his picnic table out, the hamper was emptied and he and his wife were tucking into their food on one of the busiest sections of the M4 at that between junctions 8/9 and 7 eastbound!

If anyone can top that then I'll be impressed!

What a nutter!!!

[Fat Audi 80]

Deester said:

t-c said: I had a guy who stopped in lane three of the M4 to have a picnic. He had his picnic table out, the hamper was emptied and he and his wife were tucking into their food on one of the busiest sections of the M4 at that between junctions 8/9 and 7 eastbound! If anyone can top that then I'll be impressed! What a nutter!!!

Is THAT for real?????

[BliarOut]

I used to go out with a girl who was a sales rep. She had a full bowl of salad for lunch every day.... While driving on the motorway!!!!

It's ok, this was in the days before it was found out that speed kills

[gone]

One sunny afternoon, whilst sitting at an emergency turn around point on the M25, watching the gently moving traffic jam wafting past at about 10mph, a truck driver stopped an stated to us that the bloke in the blue cavalier about 10 cars back in the middel lane was masturbating whilst driving along with porn mags on the passenger seat.

He was subsequently stopped and indeed, there were several copies of 'mens magazines' on the passenger seat but they were closed up!

My colleague said to the gentleman concerned,
"We have had a report that you were driving along back there whilst masturbating, Is that correct?"

He replied "I cannot deny it!"

Colleague "Well don't, its very dangerous!"

muttering under his breath about "can you believe that fg Wr" as we walked back to the patrol car!!!

I am not quite sure what he was referring to, either the masturbating, the driving whilst masturbating or the M25 itself

[Buffalo]

BliarOut said:

I used to go out with a girl who was a sales rep. She had a full bowl of salad for lunch every day.... While driving on the motorway!!!! It's ok, this was in the days before it was found out that saladkills