Thieving weasels
Discussion
So there I am, happily asleep last Thursday night/Friday morning, when suddenly, I'm awakened by 'sounds of disturbance' and the sudden clamour of the wind chimes located behind our front door.
Before I realise what I'm doing, I've shout 'What the F***', and leapt out of bed. As I'm making my way down the stairs, I can hear commotion in the hallway. When I get there, everything looks ok, so, assuming someone has been in and left, closing the door behind them, I try to open the door. It's locked.
Confused, more than half asleep, I look around the hallway, and everything is fine. Pat arrives on the scene within seconds, and says I must have been dreaming: she heard nothing.
I begin to doubt myself. I could have sworn I was within a second, two at the most, of coming face to face with an intruder. I could hear their clothes rustling in the dark. But everything is fine.
Wait a minute, check the keys (hanging behind the door, of couse). No keys for the wedge. Must be in my trousers. Nope. Coat? Nope. Shirt pocket? Nope. They must be somewhere, because no one has been in.
What's this thing on the floor, says Pat. Ah. It's the window latch from the hall window. It should be screwed to the window frame.
B*st*rd. He's forced the window, and climbed in. Probably knocked his head on the windchimes on his way in, the angle he'd have to come in at would suggest so. He's heard me coming, grabbed the keys and back out.
Recon I must have missed him by no more than two seconds.
Now, the Wedge is kept in a locked garage, with the Yaris parked right up against the door. Next door has a Z4 on the open driveway, and next door the other way has some kind of BMW rep-mobile, so I'm pretty sure that they came in looking to burglarize, and grabbed the keys as a bit of opportunism. Often burglars look for keys fisrt thing anyway, to get themselves a quick escape.
But of course, it still means I have to change all the keys, get a new window frame, and sit up a few nights with suitable weaponry at the ready, just in case.
Before I realise what I'm doing, I've shout 'What the F***', and leapt out of bed. As I'm making my way down the stairs, I can hear commotion in the hallway. When I get there, everything looks ok, so, assuming someone has been in and left, closing the door behind them, I try to open the door. It's locked.
Confused, more than half asleep, I look around the hallway, and everything is fine. Pat arrives on the scene within seconds, and says I must have been dreaming: she heard nothing.
I begin to doubt myself. I could have sworn I was within a second, two at the most, of coming face to face with an intruder. I could hear their clothes rustling in the dark. But everything is fine.
Wait a minute, check the keys (hanging behind the door, of couse). No keys for the wedge. Must be in my trousers. Nope. Coat? Nope. Shirt pocket? Nope. They must be somewhere, because no one has been in.
What's this thing on the floor, says Pat. Ah. It's the window latch from the hall window. It should be screwed to the window frame.
B*st*rd. He's forced the window, and climbed in. Probably knocked his head on the windchimes on his way in, the angle he'd have to come in at would suggest so. He's heard me coming, grabbed the keys and back out.
Recon I must have missed him by no more than two seconds.
Now, the Wedge is kept in a locked garage, with the Yaris parked right up against the door. Next door has a Z4 on the open driveway, and next door the other way has some kind of BMW rep-mobile, so I'm pretty sure that they came in looking to burglarize, and grabbed the keys as a bit of opportunism. Often burglars look for keys fisrt thing anyway, to get themselves a quick escape.
But of course, it still means I have to change all the keys, get a new window frame, and sit up a few nights with suitable weaponry at the ready, just in case.
Awful experience Phil.
Still, you can content yourself with the knowledge that you have NOT been the victim of a real crime - at least thats what our beloved government says.
I know, I know, it FEELS like your house has been violated, and you now have to spend your hard earned money fixing windows and changing locks etc, but this is only imaginary. No crime committed here, crime figures are down.
You asked for it anyway, having a nice car like that.... (thats what the social worker representing the little scrote who nicked my car told me)
Buy a dog and take up baseball matey.......
Andy
Still, you can content yourself with the knowledge that you have NOT been the victim of a real crime - at least thats what our beloved government says.
I know, I know, it FEELS like your house has been violated, and you now have to spend your hard earned money fixing windows and changing locks etc, but this is only imaginary. No crime committed here, crime figures are down.
You asked for it anyway, having a nice car like that.... (thats what the social worker representing the little scrote who nicked my car told me)
Buy a dog and take up baseball matey.......
Andy
I got a bigggggg an a mean biggg Alsation, if he wer a wedge he wud be the biggest sooped up SEAC you could imagine, but sum little scrote, or shud I say a gang of 4, broke in my place while ai was at the pub, the dog was in the garage looking after my BUSA, they took a meat cleaver from the kitchen, this is were they came in, to sort him out with if he was in the house an took the keys for the Impreza WRX.
Dog fine cat fine window fixed got car back within 10 mins, traker fitted that gives me a bell if it moves when it shouldnt even if the keys are used.
Moral of the story is get a safe for the keys bolted to the wall next to the bed!!!! thats wot I have now!!! 30 kwid or so.
They even tried hi jaking the low loader to nik the car off when it was picked up!!!!!
Little Barsteweds shud have ther hands an feet kut off!!!!!!!!
Dog fine cat fine window fixed got car back within 10 mins, traker fitted that gives me a bell if it moves when it shouldnt even if the keys are used.
Moral of the story is get a safe for the keys bolted to the wall next to the bed!!!! thats wot I have now!!! 30 kwid or so.
They even tried hi jaking the low loader to nik the car off when it was picked up!!!!!
Little Barsteweds shud have ther hands an feet kut off!!!!!!!!
Very nasty - don't envy you at all, when I came home to find 2 scrotes in the house - called the police from a neighbours but they had already been disturbed, they legged it in their stolen car (not mine) and when they did catch them they had an 8" hunting knife - quite glad I didn't try anything really.. but at least I have their names and addresses from the CPS..
It just gets me going things like that!. I would absolutely go nuts if I found some little theiving scum bag in my house, or trying to nick the motor 
It only happened once, my missus and me were trying to change some fuses in our new / old house (100 year old wiring!).
It was completely dark and around 11pm, we were downstairs and she thought she heard a noise outside by the cars.
Having the other torch she wandered off to have a quick look leaving me to carry on with the work.
About three minutes later I heard a shout and a commotion outside I ran round the side to have a look only to see my missus beating the holy shite out of this theiving scrote with the Maglite.
The guy staggered to his feet and bounded (well sort of limped) down the road as fast as his little theiving legs would carry him.
It took me about half an hour to get the bits of this guys hair, blood and skin off the torch
I have absolutely no sympathy for any scumbag who tries to nick anything off us - They will have my missus to contend with!
MikeB
It only happened once, my missus and me were trying to change some fuses in our new / old house (100 year old wiring!).
It was completely dark and around 11pm, we were downstairs and she thought she heard a noise outside by the cars.
Having the other torch she wandered off to have a quick look leaving me to carry on with the work.
About three minutes later I heard a shout and a commotion outside I ran round the side to have a look only to see my missus beating the holy shite out of this theiving scrote with the Maglite.
The guy staggered to his feet and bounded (well sort of limped) down the road as fast as his little theiving legs would carry him.
It took me about half an hour to get the bits of this guys hair, blood and skin off the torch
I have absolutely no sympathy for any scumbag who tries to nick anything off us - They will have my missus to contend with!
MikeB
Glad you are ok,we have a dog,alarm system for the house and garage and CCTV.You shouldn't need it but this country is going down hill fast.
If you do take up baseball make sure the bat and ball have been used to play the game before being used for anything else.
Tip i got off the BIB
If you do take up baseball make sure the bat and ball have been used to play the game before being used for anything else.
Tip i got off the BIB
My excuse is I collect Knives!!!!!!!!
got 3 Samuria on display in the Bedroom only one "proper" one 7 machette down the stairs 1 4ft long 2 3ft long 4 2ft long all proper an all very sharp, screwed to the wall obviously or should I say the sheaths are and a couple of Bowie KNives wi me camping gear
A good one is if you have a dog you kan get a damm heavy thick chain on a sturdy leather handle for less than a fiver. When I ran my own security company I had a big mag lite,club, and one thick dog chain, nuther club, and a chain wi a big bunch of keys for all the builsings attached to the end bowt 2 ft long, club wi spikes none were illeagal but all made the little scrotes bleed, cry, run, limp away
>> Edited by B19 JAE on Tuesday 3rd August 11:38
got 3 Samuria on display in the Bedroom only one "proper" one 7 machette down the stairs 1 4ft long 2 3ft long 4 2ft long all proper an all very sharp
, screwed to the wall obviously or should I say the sheaths are and a couple of Bowie KNives wi me camping gear A good one is if you have a dog you kan get a damm heavy thick chain on a sturdy leather handle for less than a fiver. When I ran my own security company I had a big mag lite,club, and one thick dog chain, nuther club, and a chain wi a big bunch of keys for all the builsings attached to the end bowt 2 ft long, club wi spikes none were illeagal but all made the little scrotes bleed, cry, run, limp away
>> Edited by B19 JAE on Tuesday 3rd August 11:38
Had the same thing happen to me a few years back. Thieves broke in through the back, picked up the keys to our new A Class and walked out through the front door. In some ways I was glad I was sound asleep at the time - unusual as I am a light sleeper, had I woke up someone would have been killed I have no doubts.
Turns out the thieves took away 2 other mercs from the same street. My car was found on its way to Jamaica along with the person looking after our theft claim after her car was nicked too.....
Turns out the thieves took away 2 other mercs from the same street. My car was found on its way to Jamaica along with the person looking after our theft claim after her car was nicked too.....
Cor blimey we are all a very nasty bunch ain't we? 
I knew a bloke once that had a bren gun under his bed and had a tank in the garage and I do mean a TANK complete with .50 cal brownings (absolutely true story).
I still reckon I got the guns of Navrone of anti theft deterants though and I love her loads x.
MikeB
>> Edited by mikeb on Tuesday 3rd August 19:36
I knew a bloke once that had a bren gun under his bed and had a tank in the garage and I do mean a TANK complete with .50 cal brownings (absolutely true story).
I still reckon I got the guns of Navrone of anti theft deterants though and I love her loads x.
MikeB
>> Edited by mikeb on Tuesday 3rd August 19:36
Just read this thread; DONT keep keys near the door or kitchen worktops. There is a growing crime mainly on the outskirts of London at the moment, its the car keys they are after, big gang with contacts and containers, they have the car either cut up and/or out the country within days. Not far from me there is about 1 or 2 cars a night,and its in a small area. extra bib patrols no one caught. BE WARNED
mikeb said:Should have reported it as a case of attempted rape/sexual asault - it would have got BiB attention! - Streaky
About three minutes later I heard a shout and a commotion outside I ran round the side to have a look only to see my missus beating the holy shite out of this theiving scrote with the Maglite.
The guy staggered to his feet and bounded (well sort of limped) down the road as fast as his little theiving legs would carry him.
It took me about half an hour to get the bits of this guys hair, blood and skin off the torch.
The BiB will not do anything! The guy who tried nicking my missus car obviously only understands one thing and he certainly will not come around here again
He was quite lucky really as my woman really is a mashing machine when she gets going
usually she only stops bashing when she sees blood coming out of the ears!.
MikeB
He was quite lucky really as my woman really is a mashing machine when she gets going
usually she only stops bashing when she sees blood coming out of the ears!. MikeB
mikeb said:
The BiB will not do anything! The guy who tried nicking my missus car obviously only understands one thing and he certainly will not come around here again
He was quite lucky really as my woman really is a mashing machine when she gets going
MikeB
Do I take it from this you do as you're told in your house?
degz said:
Just read this thread; DONT keep keys near the door or kitchen worktops. There is a growing crime mainly on the outskirts of London at the moment, its the car keys they are after, big gang with contacts and containers, they have the car either cut up and/or out the country within days. Not far from me there is about 1 or 2 cars a night,and its in a small area. extra bib patrols no one caught. BE WARNED
Agreed…. Buy a key cupboard and put it under the stairs or something like that - keep it out of sight.
I've heard it said by the BiB that it's actually better to keep the keys somewhere easily found.
If a gang of pro's come for the keys, then they are not going to leave without them, and the easier it is for them, the easier it is for you.
A guy I know kept his keys for his new M3 upstairs, and one night he woke up with three big guys stood over his bed. All in black, all with balaclavas, and all with various items of weaponry.
Two thers were going through the rooms of his house systematically. They didn't stop beating him till he handed the keys over...
If a gang of pro's come for the keys, then they are not going to leave without them, and the easier it is for them, the easier it is for you.
A guy I know kept his keys for his new M3 upstairs, and one night he woke up with three big guys stood over his bed. All in black, all with balaclavas, and all with various items of weaponry.
Two thers were going through the rooms of his house systematically. They didn't stop beating him till he handed the keys over...
Ey Rev we will av less o that a know its only a pitstop car till it sell bur dunt 4 get I got that BMW cab mate
Keep the keys in a safe majority are sneak theve in an out without yoiu erin em the others will break in while your out n the car is in.
the other choice you have is take your kar keys with you when you go out.
You gota have sumut spesh, must o bin a hell of a BMW to warrant wakin sumwun up for an at the end o the day you kan alus jus give em the keys before they batter you!!!!
I kep mine in a box by the door they turned over a bedroom an front room draws lookin, if they had bi in safe in the garage the car wud never have gone
Keep the keys in a safe majority are sneak theve in an out without yoiu erin em the others will break in while your out n the car is in.
the other choice you have is take your kar keys with you when you go out.
You gota have sumut spesh, must o bin a hell of a BMW to warrant wakin sumwun up for an at the end o the day you kan alus jus give em the keys before they batter you!!!!
I kep mine in a box by the door they turned over a bedroom an front room draws lookin, if they had bi in safe in the garage the car wud never have gone
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