My wife's impressive driving
Discussion
Heya Guys,
Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
Superchickenn said:
Heya Guys,
Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
You seem to be taking it quite well. I assume she is a looker. Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
But not when driving.

sneaky schnell said:
Superchickenn said:
Heya Guys,
Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
You seem to be taking it quite well. I assume she is a looker. Sunday the wife came in to say she's had an incident in her car (ka)
Looking sheepish i looked at the car through the window to find scratches and a dent from the door all the way back to the end of the bumper... thought oh dear but accidents happen
When i asked what she had hit she looked even more sheepish as she looked at my bmw :-(
She's taken out the wing and front bumper, she has crashed one car into another ... :-(
Anyone else ever had this problem lol??
But not when driving.

Well its either laugh about it and winge on a website,
or go mental and just cause tension in the house...
i just wish she hit the wall instead of my car lol
My friends dad had a tale about him and his brother.... he is now just the wrong side of 50, and his brother, similar.
his mother and father had nearly new cars at the time, and him and his brother crashed into each other on backroads and wrote both off!! For the record they werent racing, in fact going the opposite way by all accounts!
THAT would have been a tail between legs moment....
"muuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmm...................."
his mother and father had nearly new cars at the time, and him and his brother crashed into each other on backroads and wrote both off!! For the record they werent racing, in fact going the opposite way by all accounts!
THAT would have been a tail between legs moment....
"muuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmm...................."
I had an ex-gf who crashed her mums car.
Openly admitted she didn't stop in time, caused damage to the front light clusters, bumper, grille, bonnet and one wing.
What did she crash into? The fecking garage door and wall!
I remember months afterwards her dad saying it cost him as much to sort the garage as it did the car!
Openly admitted she didn't stop in time, caused damage to the front light clusters, bumper, grille, bonnet and one wing.
What did she crash into? The fecking garage door and wall!
I remember months afterwards her dad saying it cost him as much to sort the garage as it did the car!
Just got my Mk6 GTi back from the repairers after the wife reversed it into my Merc on our drive.
Not a scratch on the Merc but the Golf's rear bumper was knocked out and bent.
Apparently my fault because I came home from work early and did not tell her so she was not expecting my car to be there !
Not a scratch on the Merc but the Golf's rear bumper was knocked out and bent.
Apparently my fault because I came home from work early and did not tell her so she was not expecting my car to be there !
My wife is terrible, smashed mirrors from getting too close, she once put a dent down the side of the car when pulling out of our road, by scraping down the side of the cars bumber parked on the corner.
This was a corsa which she eventually wrote off (more of that later) that had
- bonnet damaged
- front bumper damaged
- front drivers wing damaged
- drivers door damaged
- rear passenger (drivers side) door damaged
- rear quarter damaged (drivers side)
- hatchback damaged
- rear bumper damaged
- drivers wing mirror damaged
- passenger rear quarter - damaged
- rear passender door damaged
- front passenger door damaged
- passenger Mirror - OK
- Passenger wing - OK
- Roof - OK
All of which she did in pretty much single events apart from the passenger front door rear door and rear quarter - in incident mentioned above.
Now for the "piece de resistance" - the story of how the Corsa eventually got written off.
I had a call from her one teatime -
Her - I "think" I've hit something
me - what do you mean think? you either have or you haven't?
her - I think I drove over something coming out of the car park and now its making a funny noise
me - what kind of noise?
her - just a noise
me - ok where are you i'll come and see
I drove to her expecting to see the undertray scrapping on the ground. As I approached I had to do a 360 on a roundabout as she was on the other side of the dual carriageway in a bus stop - halfway round the roundabout starting at the entrance she would have come on at, was a wide trail of oil............leading up to her car. My heart sank.
I looked at the car - half the sump was missing, the enjgine had been ripped from the engine mounts and was resting ofn the cross member, bits of mount were under and inside the engine bay.
As always I find shouting WTF and generally repeating the words 'you THINK you hit something' helps calm a situation down. I went back to the car park to see what the hell she had 'thought' she had hit that could cause such damage.
It was a 4 inch high curbed lane divider on the exit of the car park, a metal pole was sticking out on top by a further 4 inches or so. She had basically driven over the central lane divider and planed the under side of the car.
To this daye how on earth she 'thought' she might have hit something as opposed to being very very sure, is beyond me.
...............I don't mind admitting she is an appalling driver, and ashe frightens the living bejesus out of me.............But she has never had an 'accident' everything she hits is stationary.
Common faults/annoyancies
- poor observation
- stops at every roundabout irrespective of whether its clear
- stops in the middle of a roa to let people out of side roads
- anchors on in the middle of roads when gaps get smaller than a double decker bus
- when driving past parked vehicles she will often be on the other side of the road - probably closer to the ones on the opposite side than those on the passenger side. This is often accompanied by traffic coming towards you swerving to avoid us, or she stops in the ,middle of the road cos the huge gap is 'too small'.
- drives straight across roundabouts cutting up the 'inside' lane
- used to drive way too fast - had 9 points at one stage - none for 6 years now
I'm bored now I could go on for hours - every car she has owned has ended up a wreck - no one 'prang' being worthy of an isurance claim.
One last one - her last car was also written off this time by someone rear ending her. There was no outward obvious visible damage, the bumper had done a magnificent job of absobing the smash and bounced back, but the boot was creased and the hatch back was once opened would not close. Rear end had been stoived in by about 2 inches. She let the guy who rear ended her drive off without swapping details. so we ended up paying for that
This was a corsa which she eventually wrote off (more of that later) that had
- bonnet damaged
- front bumper damaged
- front drivers wing damaged
- drivers door damaged
- rear passenger (drivers side) door damaged
- rear quarter damaged (drivers side)
- hatchback damaged
- rear bumper damaged
- drivers wing mirror damaged
- passenger rear quarter - damaged
- rear passender door damaged
- front passenger door damaged
- passenger Mirror - OK
- Passenger wing - OK
- Roof - OK
All of which she did in pretty much single events apart from the passenger front door rear door and rear quarter - in incident mentioned above.
Now for the "piece de resistance" - the story of how the Corsa eventually got written off.
I had a call from her one teatime -
Her - I "think" I've hit something
me - what do you mean think? you either have or you haven't?
her - I think I drove over something coming out of the car park and now its making a funny noise
me - what kind of noise?
her - just a noise
me - ok where are you i'll come and see
I drove to her expecting to see the undertray scrapping on the ground. As I approached I had to do a 360 on a roundabout as she was on the other side of the dual carriageway in a bus stop - halfway round the roundabout starting at the entrance she would have come on at, was a wide trail of oil............leading up to her car. My heart sank.
I looked at the car - half the sump was missing, the enjgine had been ripped from the engine mounts and was resting ofn the cross member, bits of mount were under and inside the engine bay.
As always I find shouting WTF and generally repeating the words 'you THINK you hit something' helps calm a situation down. I went back to the car park to see what the hell she had 'thought' she had hit that could cause such damage.
It was a 4 inch high curbed lane divider on the exit of the car park, a metal pole was sticking out on top by a further 4 inches or so. She had basically driven over the central lane divider and planed the under side of the car.
To this daye how on earth she 'thought' she might have hit something as opposed to being very very sure, is beyond me.
...............I don't mind admitting she is an appalling driver, and ashe frightens the living bejesus out of me.............But she has never had an 'accident' everything she hits is stationary.
Common faults/annoyancies
- poor observation
- stops at every roundabout irrespective of whether its clear
- stops in the middle of a roa to let people out of side roads
- anchors on in the middle of roads when gaps get smaller than a double decker bus
- when driving past parked vehicles she will often be on the other side of the road - probably closer to the ones on the opposite side than those on the passenger side. This is often accompanied by traffic coming towards you swerving to avoid us, or she stops in the ,middle of the road cos the huge gap is 'too small'.
- drives straight across roundabouts cutting up the 'inside' lane
- used to drive way too fast - had 9 points at one stage - none for 6 years now
I'm bored now I could go on for hours - every car she has owned has ended up a wreck - no one 'prang' being worthy of an isurance claim.
One last one - her last car was also written off this time by someone rear ending her. There was no outward obvious visible damage, the bumper had done a magnificent job of absobing the smash and bounced back, but the boot was creased and the hatch back was once opened would not close. Rear end had been stoived in by about 2 inches. She let the guy who rear ended her drive off without swapping details. so we ended up paying for that
A guy I used to work with always rushed around like his arse is on fire, it was his undoing, he'd bought a brand new focus for the wife, Saturday morning jumps into his range rover stuck it in reverse and down the drive he went, the drive was steep , vision restricted he hit the brand new focus, which was at the bottom of his drive whilst an amused delivery driver knocked on his front door, I don't think his wife was amused, we were though

Not long after passing my test I impressively reversed my mum's car into my dad's on their drive.
My mum had demolished the driver's side mirror glass a couple of days previously so I was using the passenger side to guide me down the drive. Unforunately I'd completely forgotten about dad's car parked at the bottom until there was a loud crunch & I suddendly stopped rolling back.
I'm still amused now at the moment I sheepishly broke the news to dad...
Me: "I've just crashed mum's car"
Dad: "Into what?"
Me: "Your car"
Naturally I blamed mum for a) breaking the mirror in the first place & b) parking behind me when I was first out in the morning.
Thankfully it didn't cause any damage to dad's car & only a new rear bumper was required for mum's, which I managed to pick up second hand from eBay.
My mum had demolished the driver's side mirror glass a couple of days previously so I was using the passenger side to guide me down the drive. Unforunately I'd completely forgotten about dad's car parked at the bottom until there was a loud crunch & I suddendly stopped rolling back.
I'm still amused now at the moment I sheepishly broke the news to dad...
Me: "I've just crashed mum's car"
Dad: "Into what?"
Me: "Your car"
Naturally I blamed mum for a) breaking the mirror in the first place & b) parking behind me when I was first out in the morning.
Thankfully it didn't cause any damage to dad's car & only a new rear bumper was required for mum's, which I managed to pick up second hand from eBay.
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