Oh No! Not Another BiB Bash Story!
Oh No! Not Another BiB Bash Story!
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Discussion

WildCat

Original Poster:

8,369 posts

266 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
Perusing the paper last night - came across this gem in "Mail"...

Ben Taylor reports that Bobbies are to be offered extra £200 ... for turning up to work!

Since our BiBs and talivan traitors are so stressed out taking photos of "innocent Joes" and eating bags of doughnuts (hehe: - must be so boring!) - the powers that be in one London borough are offering BiBs and civvies bonus of £50 for not throwing sicky for at least three months. If they manage to keep turning up for further 9 months - they get another £150!

The stats say public sector workers take 17 days sick per year - compared with average of 7 in private sector.

The Met is not first to introduce this - West Mids get gift vouchers to spend at high street shops is they put in 12 months without a sicky.

80% of the sickies thrown are not certified by doctor (but then again - who manages to get past the Rottweiler at GP receptions? )

Police also have their own on-line auction to sell stolen property. Unclaimed items are placed on this auction after three months. (Nice little earner) But - in fairness - they do say that if my Shy cousin recognises her tractor - it will be withdrawn for sale and returned to her

Streetcop

5,907 posts

261 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
Happens all the time in industry....extra days off...Xmas bonuses for good attendance...Bib are not alone..

Having said that, all I got was a memo from the Ch. Supt. saying well done last year..

Street

kenp

654 posts

271 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
An aquaintance of mine is a prison officer. On arriving at his new prison, he was advised to book his summer leave as soon as possible. On producing the desired dates to the chief officer, he was advised 'whilst you are here you may as well book your sick leave'.

madant69

847 posts

270 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
So now we get people with terminal flu turning up at work to earn £50 and wiping out the entire squad with the lurgy!

YES I'm I'm talking about you Ali - go home to bed for gods sake!!

towman

14,938 posts

262 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
Funny how people who are self employed or commission based dont get sick!

Firm I worked for introduced a scheme where you only got SSP for first 7 days(I think). Odd days off sick dropped to zero.

Steve

gh0st

4,693 posts

281 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
Streetcop said:
Happens all the time in industry....extra days off...Xmas bonuses for good attendance...Bib are not alone..

Having said that, all I got was a memo from the Ch. Supt. saying well done last year..

Street


Brownnoser

silverback mike

11,292 posts

276 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
I have never met my Chief Superintendent. Maybe I should ask him for a £200 cheque for every year without sickness....

I must interject slightly here in relation to the soapbox coppers are lazy bastards because they all have 17 days sickness per year......Injuries are counted as time off....Broken nose sir, oh yes, that's a week sickness....

How many broken noses do you get in a call centre...

And for all the lazy sickie throwing bstards. Get back to work you malingering bastards and stop giving us a bad name.

ahhh that's better..

towman

14,938 posts

262 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
silverback mike said:
How many broken noses do you get in a call centre...


At least one if I could find out where the patronising tw@t i spoke to at vodashite today works.

gh0st

4,693 posts

281 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
towman said:

silverback mike said:
How many broken noses do you get in a call centre...



At least one if I could find out where the patronising tw@t i spoke to at vodashite today works.


Probably India

Name wasnt Gardip Banasharawingdingawongawoogapashripesharinaanbread was it?

robocop

489 posts

260 months

Saturday 21st August 2004
quotequote all
silverback mike said:
And for all the lazy sickie throwing bstards. Get back to work you malingering bastards and stop giving us a bad name.
ahhh that's better..


Couldn't agree more

Does that count as a 'back to work interview'

Rgds

towman

14,938 posts

262 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
gh0st said:

towman said:


silverback mike said:
How many broken noses do you get in a call centre...




At least one if I could find out where the patronising tw@t i spoke to at vodashite today works.



Probably India

Name wasnt Gardip Banasharawingdingawongawoogapashripesharinaanbread was it?


Nah - Brian!

Mad Moggie

618 posts

264 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
towman said:

gh0st said:


towman said:



silverback mike said:
How many broken noses do you get in a call centre...





At least one if I could find out where the patronising tw@t i spoke to at vodashite today works.




Probably India

Name wasnt Gardip Banasharawingdingawongawoogapashripesharinaanbread was it?



Nah - Brian!



He's changed his name again! I got Wayne!


Themoss

256 posts

261 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all

I think i read somewhere that people who work shifts take far far more time off work because it completely screws up the bodyclock, metabolism etc. Resistance levels are massively lowered and sickness occurs more often.....

robocop

489 posts

260 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
Shift certainly messes up your body clock themoss!

After 12 years, I should know!

Look at me now!, should be tucked up in bed but am wide awake on the comp.....

Mad Moggie

618 posts

264 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
silverback mike said:
.

....Injuries are counted as time off....Broken nose sir, oh yes, that's a week sickness....




So they are for others.

Warehouseman breaks his foot when stuff falls off shelf onto it...

Clerk injures herself by colliding with filing cabinet...

Nurse strains back assisting in lifting a patient (you tried moving a more or less dead weight...)

Medical staff catch lurgy off patient - well they are ill when we see them .....

A&E staff end up as their own casualties .... happens all the time according to my mate down there ....

Nasty fact of life that injuries - however obtained - whether at work or at play - count as Sick Leave.

Just unfortunate that some professions are more prone than others .... the BiBs in this family are always reminding us of this.

(Wildy has three cousins - UK side of her family - they are brothers based Durham, London and Manchester and I have one cousin in Canada who is Mounty)

Mad Moggie

618 posts

264 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
Themoss said:

I think i read somewhere that people who work shifts take far far more time off work because it completely screws up the bodyclock, metabolism etc. Resistance levels are massively lowered and sickness occurs more often.....



Bodies get used to it. Human body is still a mystery

I was never ill back in the good old days of 125 hour junior doc weeks - the patients were! and once took wildy on a hot date - only I fell face first in a plate of oysters - Wildy did not get a night of furrball passion - and she has made me pay ever since!

towman

14,938 posts

262 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
robocop said:
Shift certainly messes up your body clock themoss!

After 12 years, I should know!

Look at me now!, should be tucked up in bed but am wide awake on the comp.....


You and me both. On shift at 3am to deliver milk to Tescos, but could not sleep. Hate first shift of nights.

Steve

robocop

489 posts

260 months

Sunday 22nd August 2004
quotequote all
Christ Steve, 3 a.m.

Have you got to milk all the flamin' cows on your own too?

I am off to bed, but will be forever grateful in the morning as I make my cuppa.

Have a good run!

Rgds

silverback mike

11,292 posts

276 months

Monday 23rd August 2004
quotequote all
Nights tonight.....arse....

Streetcop

5,907 posts

261 months

Monday 23rd August 2004
quotequote all
silverback mike said:
Nights tonight.....arse....


Arse indeed...I've avoided full nights on my pro-active dept...I've been lucky..

Back to doing nights after 4th Oct..(fingers crossed..bizarrely enough)

Street