I need to divorce my wife quickly and cheaply
I need to divorce my wife quickly and cheaply
Author
Discussion

Sym7

Original Poster:

401 posts

256 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Well, it's time for me to finally accept my marriage is over and I want to do divorce as quickly and as painlessly as possible with minimal expense. I want to avoid solicitors and my wife and I have agreed custody terms for the kids and financial terms so I need to now do the following:

1. Legally divorce
2. Gain a court order to establish legal documented evidence of our financial settlement
3. Legally establish the joint custody terms for our children.

The reason for posting this here is I'm looking for advice / experience of quicky divorces...Looking to do this online. Has anyone here done this? My wife and I have agreed I will divorce her and cite adultery as the reason. Appraently we can make this happen quickly then. I want to avoid solicitor costs and simply legally divorce - it won't be contested.

Advice welcome....thanks.

MrAdaam

1,094 posts

195 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Sounds like the most straightforward divorce to hit PistonHeads in a long time. No advice, but glad (in a strange way?) that it'll work out easier for you than most.

markmullen

15,877 posts

263 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
I know you say you don't want to involve solicitors but as such a lot is at stake, and during divorces things rarely go as smoothly as expected, I'd really recommend getting one involved, the short term expense will be more than worth it long term.

N Dentressangle

3,453 posts

251 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
You can do this in around 6 months then.

Here you go:

https://www.gov.uk/divorce/file-for-divorce

Personally I would have a deed of separation and ancillary relief arrangements (or whatever it's called) for children drawn up by a solicitor.

Edited by N Dentressangle on Monday 21st October 15:52

Sym7

Original Poster:

401 posts

256 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
markmullen said:
I know you say you don't want to involve solicitors but as such a lot is at stake, and during divorces things rarely go as smoothly as expected, I'd really recommend getting one involved, the short term expense will be more than worth it long term.
The court order will take care of the financials - we've already agreed what it's going to be. Just need to get the paperwork concluded and submitted for the actual divorce. I've had 7 months of sh*t that I now need to put to bed without involving someone else who will take my money...or, have my wife involve a solicitor, and unravel everything we've mutually agreed. She's getting a good deal and, more importantly, my kids will do okay from it. I don't also want to line the pockets of a solicitor.

Engineer1

10,486 posts

238 months

Monday 21st October 2013
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Don't forget her mates will start looking at your car, your house, your hobbies, the holidays you had etc and decide there must be more money available. Get it sorted before the circling vultures arrive.

UrbanLegend

15,169 posts

263 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
I went through the same process except we had no kids and it cost me £380 smile

My mate who is a solicitor did it all at cost or thereabouts.

PurpleMoonlight

22,362 posts

186 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Sym7 said:
1. Legally divorce
2. Gain a court order to establish legal documented evidence of our financial settlement
3. Legally establish the joint custody terms for our children.
1. The dissolution of the marriage. You can easily do this yourself but it takes a long at it takes and you can't really rush it.

2. The division of marital assets is seperate to the dissolution of the marriage, it's called Ancillary Relief. You can start the ball rolling yourself but you will likley need a solicitor to draw up the agreement, called aConsent Order, for the Judge to ratify.

3. Residency of the children is again a different court process, but one with which you can do yourself. The problem is that the only legally binding agreement is a Joint Residence Order but the Court system has the principle not to make an Order where there is mutual agreement. So you can only achieve something legal if there is a dispute!

RSoovy4

35,829 posts

300 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Sym7 said:
I don't also want to line the pockets of a solicitor.
The irony is that this phrase has probably done more to put solicitors' kids through private school than any other.


Steffan

10,362 posts

257 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Good to see a number of very constructive replies. I have been divorced a number of times all by resonable agreement. However I have seen the results of seriously acrimonious divorces which can take a long time to resolve if bitterness creeps in. To my mind where children are involved these must be the primary concern of both parties. As children they rely upon their parents. The parents have to be the reasonable and responsible individual in the manner of the divorce. I do wish you well.

Fotic

719 posts

158 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
RSoovy4 said:
The irony is that this phrase has probably done more to put solicitors' kids through private school than any other.
Why are you the only legal on here who is constantly either talking about their earnings or alluding to earnings of the profession? For what is seen by many as a noble profession you don't half cheapen it! From your numerous comments on your own tax it's not even as if you're earning a significant amount either.

Very odd poster.

RSoovy4

35,829 posts

300 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Fotic said:
RSoovy4 said:
The irony is that this phrase has probably done more to put solicitors' kids through private school than any other.
Why are you the only legal on here who is constantly either talking about their earnings or alluding to earnings of the profession? For what is seen by many as a noble profession you don't half cheapen it! From your numerous comments on your own tax it's not even as if you're earning a significant amount either.

Very odd poster.
Thanks a lot for your opinion.

I am simply making the point that our OP might be better off spending a small amount in order to get the job done right first time, and to have the benefit of negligence insurance if it all goes tits.

"Simple divorces" have a nasty habit of beocming anything but some way down the line. He needs to protect himself.

You had a pop at me on the Clairvoyant thread I seem to recall - one of your seventy odd postings. If you don't like lawyers that's down to you, but to be honest I think that the OP should do this right - whether it's with advice from a solicitor which he pays for, or from a slightly paunchy bald PHer who he won't have to.





Edited by RSoovy4 on Monday 21st October 16:31

valais

59,358 posts

184 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Fotic said:
Very odd poster.
And a very helpful one who gives out far too much of his (good) advice for free... on and off the forum.

Fotic

719 posts

158 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
RSoovy4 said:
Thanks a lot.

I am simply making the point that our OP might be better off spending a small amount in order to get the job done right first time, and to have the benefit of negligence insurance if it all goes tits.

"Simple divorces" have a nasty habit of beocming anything but some way down the line. He needs to protect himself.
That's a much more helpful way of phrasing it IMO than referring to the way the advisor would spend the money.

RSoovy4

35,829 posts

300 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Fotic said:
RSoovy4 said:
Thanks a lot.

I am simply making the point that our OP might be better off spending a small amount in order to get the job done right first time, and to have the benefit of negligence insurance if it all goes tits.

"Simple divorces" have a nasty habit of beocming anything but some way down the line. He needs to protect himself.
That's a much more helpful way of phrasing it IMO than referring to the way the advisor would spend the money.
A fair challenge - but in general terms I have seen a lot of people who have tried to save money on legal fees spending many multiples sorting out the mess they make. You wouldn't try to remove your own appendix, would you? Or perhaps you would if it saves you the price of a cheap holiday!!!




longblackcoat

5,047 posts

212 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Given that a divorce might well be the most expensive financial decision you'll ever make, spending about £500 to ensure that expectation = reality seems like value to me.

Like any form of insurance, it's a pointless expense until you need it.

tbc

3,017 posts

204 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
You might have to search around for a bit to find a solicitor willing to do a quickie

They hate simple agreements. Solicitors would much rather have two arguing parties fighting over every last penny

Your doing the right thing though she might have went for a guy with a bigger cock but you'll be the guy with the big head in the end

ging84

9,548 posts

175 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
Sym7 said:
My wife and I have agreed I will divorce her and cite adultery as the reason. Appraently we can make this happen quickly then. I want to avoid solicitor costs and simply legally divorce - it won't be contested.

Advice welcome....thanks.
Are you hinting that this might not be the actual reason, if so it sounds like a recipe for disaster

Adam B

29,710 posts

283 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
ging84 said:
Are you hinting that this might not be the actual reason, if so it sounds like a recipe for disaster
not if she agrees to it

I used divorceonline.co.uk - from memory they charged about £300 and the whole thing cost £600. Just a question of fitting your arrangements into the boxes. If you really want to do it on the cheap fill the forms out yourself.

NorthernBoy

12,642 posts

286 months

Monday 21st October 2013
quotequote all
longblackcoat said:
Given that a divorce might well be the most expensive financial decision you'll ever make, spending about £500 to ensure that expectation = reality seems like value to me.

Like any form of insurance, it's a pointless expense until you need it.
I'd agree with this. My brother went through a very amicable divorce a few years back, but towards the end, and for some time afterwards, bith sides started wondering if the split that they'd happily agreed to was actually being over-generous to the other half. I know that in theory if it's all done right then there's no comeback, but that "if" might be key.

I'd counsel even the most amicable of couples to have everything at least checked over by a solicitor (each) just to confirm that it's al absolutely correctly done.