Aaaargh - I want the stealth option not 4 tailpipes

[numtumfutunch]

Why oh why oh why do most of the otherwise subtle cars I like the look of have 4 bazookas sticking out of their arses giving the game away?

Just what is the point anyway of 4 tailpipes other than for cosmetic bragging?

M cars, Audi RS's and my new object of desire (OK OK indulge me) the Golf R all have multiple pipes betraying their desirability to crims, scumbags and non specific low life

If only Id been born 10-20y earlier I could have debadged my E28 or E34 M5 and pretended I was in a 518i with no worries of it being keyed or stolen

The Golf R actually appeals but with all of the current stories of fast VW's and Audis being nicked Id rather it didnt shout its credentials quite so loudly, if I removed the R badges it would be perfect other than that ridiculous exhaust array

Thanks for your patience

[Axionknight]

So the quad tailpipes do it for the crims, but no the uber alloys, body kit and engine/model designation badges slapped everywhere?

Times change, if you don't like it, buy an old car, or a Caterham or something simple that'll go just/at least as fast.

[Leins]

I think you'll find that most of Audi's RS models only have dual pipes, and it's the S models that have the quad set-up

I agree with your point though, it's not good for Q-appeal at all

[TheLordJohn]

E36 M3 - twin tailpipes
Looks like a nice 3 series BMW to most folk.

[Jim909]

Agree - Thing is i didnt really notice it before, now it annoys the pish out of me

[p1tse]

Stick a 1.1 badge on it then its just a 1.1 with a body kit

[GTIR]

Oh look at me everyone I've got an expensive petrol head car etc, etc.

Blah bloody blah.

I don't think you've got any of those cars or the finances to even put a deposit down. In fact you don't even have a driving licence. Do you?

Ha!

[LaurasOtherHalf]

So let me get this straight, just so I know. If your car has any of the following you need to hand in your PH card & leave immediately?

Front wheel drive

Flappy paddle gearbox

Four cylinder engine

Over £25k new

Turbo charged

Has an official time at the nürburgring

& now if it has 4 tail pipes?

[MC Bodge]

Just buy one of the slightly 'lesser' models and upgrade some of the chassis parts, if necessary. It'll be less harsh riding, so long as you don't get one with over-firm suspension and massive wheels, just as fast in most situations and cost far less.

[Silverbullet767]

MC Bodge said:

Just buy one of the slightly 'lesser' models and upgrade some of the chassis parts, if necessary. It'll be less harsh riding, so long as you don't get one with over-firm suspension and massive wheels, just as fast in most situations and cost far less.

debadged 335i here, with JB4 stage 3 remap. Not had a dyno yet, but estimate 370bhp+

[s m]

numtumfutunch said:

If only Id been born 10-20y earlier I could have debadged my E28 or E34 M5 and pretended I was in a 518i with no worries of it being keyed or stolen

I think even back then the twin pipes would have betrayed you - 518i only had a single

[s4tronic]

you can buy milltek exhaust that's two oval pipes in place of most 4 pipe setup's.

[Tickle]

You could reverse park up to a wall, if the thief cant see the tail pipes or badges they will be confused and disorientated leaving the car alone, undamaged and un-nicked.

[E30Addict]

TheLordJohn said:

E36 M3 - twin tailpipes
Looks like a nice 3 series BMW to most folk.

The more I look at mine the more I prefer the twin exhaust to the later quad pipes - much more subtle.

[bqf]

I loved the quad pipes on my E55 AMG, and of course their purpose is to help the two banks of cylinders breath nice and easy. Of course, they also make a great noise.

Why would you want to change that?

[jamieduff1981]

Could always divert some of the funds to move to a nicer part of the country where nice cars don't get vandalised as a matter of course?

[jimbop1]

4 tailpipes appeals to criminals and low life's?!! Oh deary me!

There are many other cars available without 4 pipes.. Just buy one of them if you want subtle.

Edited by jimbop1 on Friday 7th March 11:10

[pcvdriver]

Tickle said:

You could reverse park up to a wall, if the thief cant see the tail pipes or badges they will be confused and disorientated leaving the car alone, undamaged and un-nicked.

I was under the impression that most modern cars were nearly impossible to steal without the keys.....

[AndyBrew]

crying out loud what a load of nonsense!

[Matt UK]

OP, 100% agree. I don't object to the bling models at all, but just give me a choice.

A Merc E63 in 'airport pick-up' spec would be superb!

We seem to be able to spec ordinary cars that look fast, but not fast cars that look ordinary!