Does your missus turn the light on if you're in bed?
Does your missus turn the light on if you're in bed?
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Discussion

CoolHands

Original Poster:

23,543 posts

225 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
Yes I'm sure I'm going to receive a good kicking for this but anyway...

If I've gone to bed my missus will just come into the bedroom later, and turn her bedside lamp on and do whatever she wants to get ready for bed etc regardless of whether I was either trying to, or actually, asleep. Eg she might hang some clothes up, brush her hair, write some text messages, go in the bathroom etc etc. This can go on for quite some time eg 10-20 minutes. The lamp is a normal bedside lamp ie quite bright - you would use it if reading in bed etc.

Now I would never do that - if she's in bed I would always creep around in the dark etc and get into bed quietly. To me that would be 'normal' behaviour.

Maybe I'm losing the plot (through lack of sleep mad) but we've had plenty of arguments in the past about this - I like it quiet and dark to go to sleep. She reckons I'm mad and it's perfectly normal to put on the bedside lamp 'that's what it's for' etc type argument. I don't bother saying anything now as it's just another argument.

So, breaking with best British tradition - what goes on behind your closed doors? Am I a moaning git? Is she taking liberties? Or is WW3 occurring nightly across the bedrooms of england?

Emeye

9,781 posts

253 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
Tell her that when she turns the light on you take that as an indication that she's up for a serious session of hide the sausage - she'll soon be creeping about in the dark letting you get your shut-eye......

TheGroover

1,044 posts

305 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
Yes she does, and it pisses me right off.

The_Burg

4,853 posts

244 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
Congratulations, you are married.

Same here. Fine for her to turn the light etc, if you do the same.... There be dragons...

Shoes... heels on, clump down the stairs, clank across the floor. Me, slippers on, shoes just by the door.


mike-r

1,539 posts

221 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
What's her problem about not doing it if you've raised the point with her? Seems terribly selfish. If someone told me to be a bit more considerate I would be, or try to be, not start an argument about it.

Leave her.

Edit: but for the record, no because our bed time is the same. She gets up earlier than me and does her makeup and hair dryer-ing in another room, though.

CoolHands

Original Poster:

23,543 posts

225 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
The_Burg said:
Congratulations, you are married
yeah. I don't remember this in our courtship...

Anyway from the answers so far at least it's not just me that suffers!

Mastodon2

14,333 posts

195 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
I don't generally go to bed at the mrs, she gets up before me for work on week days so she is in bed earlier, and on weekends I prefer to play on my Xbox late into the night and get up earlier than her anyway. I do the whole stumbling about in the dark thing, though usually I just creep in, stick my phone on the charger, set the alarm and go to sleep. I'm more concerned about waking the cat up, once he is awake he creeps around, bumping into things, climbing things he shouldn't be on and making a racket until he gets put back to bed.

theshrew

6,008 posts

214 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
Mine is usually in bed before me. I creep in lights off make the least possible noise and try and go to sleep.

Her - every fecking morning Bang bang bang bang hairdryer going etc. FECK RIGHT OFF I don't do mornings

ooo000ooo

2,647 posts

224 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
My wife complains that I breathe too loud but apparently it's acceptable for her to wake me up in the middle of the night to tell me that she can't sleep?
Wimmen wobble

perdu

4,885 posts

229 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
I suspect the annswer is "they all do that"

DOESN'T WORRY ME


much


frown

I may wake in the early hours to find the light on, her reading

"Sorry, couldn't sleep. You dont mind do you..."

As I value what's left of my manhood, "No babe, carry on...zzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

Disco You

3,749 posts

210 months

Tuesday 17th June 2014
quotequote all
The way I see it, you have three options:

1. Sleep in separate bedrooms.
2. Divorce.
3. Kill her.

Make sure she has life insurance before 3, though.

Yazar

1,476 posts

150 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
Mine doesn't- took time to train though biggrin

Change the bulb in the lamp? Or change the lamp to a downlighting/spot type one so least disturbance.

DUMBO100

1,878 posts

214 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
My Mrs complains that I breathe and expects me to buy her a handbag

perdu

4,885 posts

229 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
"I'm shocked, shocked I tell you" , to find that they don't all do that

Still after nearly 48 years she's had to put up with enough cr*p from me to make up for it.

Great cook too.

not that I'd be remotely venial about that sort of thing


wink

Edited by perdu on Wednesday 18th June 00:39

JiggyJaggy

1,474 posts

170 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
Easy if you get up in the mornings before her do exactly the same! Amazing how quickly someone will stop when they are on the receiving end of the same inconsiderate behaviour.

wildcat45

8,160 posts

219 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
I thought it was just me. So this is a normal state of affairs. I creep around using my iPad to light the way, she bursts in, puts the top light on, tidies up, opens and closes doors stamps around. Some nights it would be easier sleeping in a shipyard or steel works.

magic torch

5,781 posts

252 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
The_Burg said:
Congratulations, you are married.

Same here. Fine for her to turn the light etc, if you do the same.... There be dragons...

Shoes... heels on, clump down the stairs, clank across the floor. Me, slippers on, shoes just by the door.
yes

Always two sets of 'rules'.

Dr Murdoch

3,953 posts

165 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
Yazar said:
Mine doesn't- took time to train though biggrin

Change the bulb in the lamp? Or change the lamp to a downlighting/spot type one so least disturbance.
Take the fuse out?

Du1point8

22,925 posts

222 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
magic torch said:
The_Burg said:
Congratulations, you are married.

Same here. Fine for her to turn the light etc, if you do the same.... There be dragons...

Shoes... heels on, clump down the stairs, clank across the floor. Me, slippers on, shoes just by the door.
yes

Always two sets of 'rules'.
I make a real effort to wake her in the morning knowing she will not get back to sleep if I get woken at 1am when she has finished doing office work and decides to read in bed.

Im up at 6:45am so the last thing I need is her waking me 5 hours before Im due up.

Lots of swearing for the first couple of days, but she got the message, or maybe it was the time when I tried to cut the power cord with a knife that gave it away.

I like to play with fire.

Rosscow

9,695 posts

193 months

Wednesday 18th June 2014
quotequote all
Dr Murdoch said:
Yazar said:
Mine doesn't- took time to train though biggrin

Change the bulb in the lamp? Or change the lamp to a downlighting/spot type one so least disturbance.
Take the fuse out?
Noooo...... then she'll turn the main bedroom light on 'until you fix the lamp'