Dawn chorus

[ATG]

There is a Volvo parked opposite the flat. Its bloody alarm has been going off half the night. At about 6 this morning it seemed like the car's battery might be going flat. The alarm was quieter, only going off in very short bursts and tailing off. Then it went off normally again. Odd, thought I. Normal alarm and flat battery alarm alternated for a while until it finally dawned on me that "flat battery alarm" was actually some bloody bird (starling, blackbird, thrush, ostritch, pilchard, I know not) that was singing back to the f***ing car. Very clever, bird. Well observed, very witty.

[shirley temple]

want to borrow my air rifle?

[mr_tony]

ATG said:

Very clever, bird. Well observed, very witty.

Starlings are particularly good at this. A group near my old house had accurately mimiced my telephone on many occasions making me leave the garden to find the phone, then feel like a pillock...

[beano500]

shirley temple said:

want to borrow my air rifle?

I doubt that would do sufficient damage to a Volvo....

[richardthestag]

beano500 said:

shirley temple said: want to borrow my air rifle? I doubt that would do sufficient damage to a Volvo....

What you need is a Rangie and some strong tow rope. Simply tow the noisy bastard 2 miles down the road.

[shirley temple]

beano500 said:

shirley temple said: want to borrow my air rifle? I doubt that would do sufficient damage to a Volvo....

Its got a very big, very naughty spring in it and a double seal, it will hole volvo panels at 50 yards , no probs, whilst its in the bodyshop being fixed you will have peace!
It also turns off poorly adjusted garden floodlights that light up my bedroom at night, approx 100yds away (must be those pesky kids again)



edited to add that this is all a bad dream that I'm relaying to you all, just a figment of my imagination

>> Edited by shirley temple on Wednesday 12th January 00:43