WTF is in my bed
Discussion
This really bloody scared me.
I awoke at 4am after hearing some kind of noise out my bedroom window. As I lay there in the dark I felt with my feet a heavy bundle on the end of the bed. I thought at first it was part of Mrs Z, but ruled that out as I could slide my leg down the centre of the bed. Was it a bundle of clothes I thought,
as I probed away…………………………………..Then, WTF it moved
Now I don’t have any pets, so you can imagine I was beginning to get a bit concerned that there may be some psycho-nutter
resting on the end of the bed. Either that, or a poltergeist double
With the hairs on my neck beginning to stand on end I rolled out of bed and headed for the light switch. I hear a scream from Mrs Z and her bed side lamp goes on. With no obvious sign of an intruder I demand to know WTF she is playing at.
Mrs Z shows me her scratched lip which is beginning to swell a little and accuses me of attacking her.
A quick look around the room and I see a little black and white bastard making a break for it out of our open window.
Next doors cat had come in through the open window and was sleeping on my bed. I must have toed it off when I got up and it ran over Mrs Z’s face before leaping out the window.
It took me about 30 minutes before my body had calmed sufficiently to fall asleep again.
You have just entered, the twilight zone
Z
I awoke at 4am after hearing some kind of noise out my bedroom window. As I lay there in the dark I felt with my feet a heavy bundle on the end of the bed. I thought at first it was part of Mrs Z, but ruled that out as I could slide my leg down the centre of the bed. Was it a bundle of clothes I thought,
as I probed away…………………………………..Then, WTF it moved
Now I don’t have any pets, so you can imagine I was beginning to get a bit concerned that there may be some psycho-nutter
resting on the end of the bed. Either that, or a poltergeist double
With the hairs on my neck beginning to stand on end I rolled out of bed and headed for the light switch. I hear a scream from Mrs Z and her bed side lamp goes on. With no obvious sign of an intruder I demand to know WTF she is playing at.
Mrs Z shows me her scratched lip which is beginning to swell a little and accuses me of attacking her.
A quick look around the room and I see a little black and white bastard making a break for it out of our open window. Next doors cat had come in through the open window and was sleeping on my bed. I must have toed it off when I got up and it ran over Mrs Z’s face before leaping out the window.
It took me about 30 minutes before my body had calmed sufficiently to fall asleep again.
You have just entered, the twilight zone
Z
Something similar happened to me when one morning around Easter a few years ago, a sparrow made its way through my window (but behind my curtains). Woken up by a horrible amplified fluttering sound and this poor thing pecking at the windows, occasionally flying back into the curtains causing them to waft cold air through the room.
Thought I was about to encounter the world's biggest most heavily-armed wasp (and I really, really don't like wasps!)
Thought I was about to encounter the world's biggest most heavily-armed wasp (and I really, really don't like wasps!)
I was staying at the gfs, same thing happened. Woke up to find somthing on my chest, opened my eyes to see a dark blurry shape hovering over my face. Took fright and launched said creature across the room as hard as I could, then remembered that she had a cat.
I felts so bad the next day I popped out and bought the cat some treats.
I felts so bad the next day I popped out and bought the cat some treats.
WildfireS3 said:
I was staying at the gfs, same thing happened. Woke up to find somthing on my chest, opened my eyes to see a dark blurry shape hovering over my face. Took fright and launched said creature across the room as hard as I could, then remembered that she had a cat.
I felts so bad the next day I popped out and bought the cat some treats.
At least it wasn't an alien bursting through your ribs
Z
z_chromozone said:
WildfireS3 said:
I was staying at the gfs, same thing happened. Woke up to find somthing on my chest, opened my eyes to see a dark blurry shape hovering over my face. Took fright and launched said creature across the room as hard as I could, then remembered that she had a cat.
I felts so bad the next day I popped out and bought the cat some treats.
At least it wasn't an alien bursting through your ribs![]()
![]()
Z
Why, is that a frequent occurence in your household?

I've had the same thing! Neighbours cat always used to come to our house for company when her owners went away. She was ver reluctant to leave but we had to chuck her out come bed time. It was middle of summer so I had my window open but only a tiny bit!
This 16 year old cat managed to slid through (not an easy task!) and scare the heck out of me by gangling my wind chime and jump through the curtains!!!
This 16 year old cat managed to slid through (not an easy task!) and scare the heck out of me by gangling my wind chime and jump through the curtains!!!
This happened to me...almost ten years ago now.. Asleep in bed.
(New) Wife: "Put the cat out..."
Me: But we don't have a cat!
(New) Wife: "Put the
cat out!" Me: Errrr. Oh. OK.
Cat came in the window....cat should've gone out the window but I didn't have the heart. It went out the front door. Window closed...
cmsapms said:
It might be an idea to turn the heating down, then you could shut the window.
If our window had been open last night, we'd've ended up with a snowdrift on the bed![]()
Reminds me of a time when I went to visit a friend of mine at Aberdeen uni in the middle of December. And his halls are (a converted prison!) on top of a big hill. One night the window didn't shut properly, and I had to sleep in my leather jacket, a huge sweater and a pair of jeans I'd brought up. Even then I was freezing - there was ice on the floor the next morning!
WildfireS3 said:
I was staying at the gfs, same thing happened. Woke up to find somthing on my chest, opened my eyes to see a dark blurry shape hovering over my face. Took fright and launched said creature across the room as hard as I could, then remembered that she had a cat.
I felts so bad the next day I popped out and bought the cat some treats.
I always find it a bit nice actually to wake up with the g/f pussy on my chest.....

I had a similar scare a few months ago;
After a night on the
, returned to a mates house to sleep on floor. Woke up at sunrise with a mental screeching squawking noise ...(sh4t it).
Cuoldnt work it out, then it turned out his girlfriend had bought him a pair of lovebirds, which for obvious reasons (hiding them from the boys!) he was keeping under a towel (about a foot from my head).
Obviously after that he didnt live it down for a while....
>> Edited by jke11y on Tuesday 18th January 12:23
After a night on the
, returned to a mates house to sleep on floor. Woke up at sunrise with a mental screeching squawking noise ...(sh4t it). Cuoldnt work it out, then it turned out his girlfriend had bought him a pair of lovebirds, which for obvious reasons (hiding them from the boys!) he was keeping under a towel (about a foot from my head).
Obviously after that he didnt live it down for a while....
>> Edited by jke11y on Tuesday 18th January 12:23
vixpy1 said:
cmsapms said:
It might be an idea to turn the heating down, then you could shut the window.
Does anyone elsew find it impossible to sleep without the heating off and the window wide open? Whatever the weather?
Nope, my heating goes on 24/7 in October and stays that way until March.... I think I was born too far north!
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It might be an idea to turn the heating down, then you could shut the window.
ed 