Theoretical robbery...

[Sideways Tim]

If I trained a monkey to rob a bank, what would I be guilty of?

[timetex]

At the very least, a primate facie case of handling stolen goods.

[btcc123]

Monkey business

[austinsmirk]

using gorilla warfare ?

[Vaud]

Sideways Tim said:

If I trained a monkey to rob a bank, what would I be guilty of?

Conspiracy to rob?

[superlightr]

Aping and abetting. Im sure the cops will have you Gibbon them all the info they need to make you Swing for it or at least put you behind Bars for a long time. You will then be Howling and will be the SilverBack' biatch.

[Ganglandboss]

You would probably be sectioned, as your plan is clearly bananas.

[AndyNetwork]

I'd dare say you would be the polices primate suspect.

[Tim330]

Use a Mandrill, perfectly legal in English law

[speedking31]

You'd probably only get away with peanuts.

[Hooli]

Make himi wear a rubber glove on his head & plod will go looking for a chicken.

[Actus Reus]

Sideways Tim said:

If I trained a monkey to rob a bank, what would I be guilty of?

Robbery

[mph1977]

Tim330 said:

Use a Mandrill, perfectly legal in English law

i think your shatner's bassoon may be damaged ..

[dacouch]

I suggest you increase the robbers share of the booty otherwise if you pay peanuts you'll get...

[btcc123]

Is this the getaway car.

[MrBarry123]

How much to borrow the monkey once you're finished OP?

[anonymous-user]

Gives new meaning to the old East End phrase "He said he'd give me a monkey if I'd be the wheel man on his next blag."

[Monkeylegend]

You would be a Legend.

[anonymous-user]

If you use an 'innocent agent' you are liable as the principal. A child under 10 being a practical example used to supply drugs on a dealer's behalf. I believe 'innocent agent' extends to trained animals, so I believe you'd be guilty of robbery if it were carried out.

In terms of merely training one, if that's literally what you meant, I can't think off the top of my head what would cover that. 'Going equipped' only applies to inanimate objects.

You would be entirely innocent if the monkey looks as good as this, though:

[Mr GrimNasty]

Jason Statham's losing his looks.