A*se clench moments
Discussion
Had a bit of an arse clench moment riding home last night, I had just sprinted off from some traffic lights and was doing about 50kmh when my chain decided it no longer liked the front chain ring and departed company to wrap its self round the BB. Now considering I am standing on the pedals giving it the beans I banged my knees on the bars and ended up sitting on the top tube(drop bar planet x comuter) but managed to stay upright. Then the chain decides to take out the rear mech and wrap itsself between teh block and spokes locking the rear wheel, After 30 yards of sliding down the road the rear tyre has worn through and promptly bursts making it even harder to stay uprigh, but eventually I come to a stop and manage to get the bike off the road much to the ammusement of the cars behind.
So now I need a new chainset, chain, block, rear mech tyre,tube and a few spokes, ho hum looks like its time to upgrade....
I new that the chain was worn well past its life limit but was hoping it would make it through the winter, obviously not
(Cant spell either.....arse)
So now I need a new chainset, chain, block, rear mech tyre,tube and a few spokes, ho hum looks like its time to upgrade....
I new that the chain was worn well past its life limit but was hoping it would make it through the winter, obviously not
(Cant spell either.....arse)
Edited by Tiddy1 on Friday 4th December 14:47
I've had a handful of occasions which have resulted in "bloody hell, that hurts" anywhere from 1 second to 5 hours (3 of which I spent unconscious) after the event, but the only occasion I've ever had to savour the moment was the realisation that I'd got a front tyre puncture about 10 seconds after I crested the top of a hill and was up to 28mph on the way down the other side.
I still have no idea how I managed to keep it upright!
I still have no idea how I managed to keep it upright!
Too many to remember on MTB, only 1 resulted in stitches though. Ironically it was on a road ride during the foot & mouth crisis.
Close shave when the r/h pedal on my Scalpel decided it didn't want to stay attached to the crank arm, had only just started climbing a steep hill, seconds later & that could have been nasty.
Had a seat bracket fail on my Alpinestars, that was watching the Solar eclipse so 2000? Came close to not fathering 2 kids that time!
Only had one minor moment on the road bike but only ridden a few hundred miles so far, I'm sure there'll be more.
Close shave when the r/h pedal on my Scalpel decided it didn't want to stay attached to the crank arm, had only just started climbing a steep hill, seconds later & that could have been nasty.
Had a seat bracket fail on my Alpinestars, that was watching the Solar eclipse so 2000? Came close to not fathering 2 kids that time!
Only had one minor moment on the road bike but only ridden a few hundred miles so far, I'm sure there'll be more.
Well.... I spent 3 weeks on a trauma ward after s crash once, but I've told that tale so many times!
Had an almost complete brake failure on my DH bike once, crappy Avid Code brakes, the rear was getting closer to the bar with every pull but I decided to keep going, "I've still got the front" I thought - until I didn't something failed in the lever and it jammed fast, the rear was enough to sort of maintain speed rather than stop, thankfully I managed to get to the road drop (I was at Cwmcarn) and roll out along the fireroad.
Managed to get separated from our guide in Whistler and found a black graded technical trail in the pouring rain - yay slippery ladder bridges! Still I made it down, unlike my mate who fell 12' straght onto his back, not a mark on him!
Had an almost complete brake failure on my DH bike once, crappy Avid Code brakes, the rear was getting closer to the bar with every pull but I decided to keep going, "I've still got the front" I thought - until I didn't something failed in the lever and it jammed fast, the rear was enough to sort of maintain speed rather than stop, thankfully I managed to get to the road drop (I was at Cwmcarn) and roll out along the fireroad.
Managed to get separated from our guide in Whistler and found a black graded technical trail in the pouring rain - yay slippery ladder bridges! Still I made it down, unlike my mate who fell 12' straght onto his back, not a mark on him!
Biggest 'whoops apocalypse' moment this year was going down a 15% hill in Dorest on the Jurassic Beast when an elderly gent (aka dozy c**t), pulled out of his drive without looking - cars coming up the hill meant I could not bail to the other side of the road so passed between the elderly gent (aka dozy c**t), and oncoming cars at over 45 mph with no more than a fag paper between my elbows and their wing mirrors.
Got to the bottom of the hill and one of the other riders who had been following (albeit at a slightly more sedate pace), asked if I was an ex Red Arrows pilot!!
Got to the bottom of the hill and one of the other riders who had been following (albeit at a slightly more sedate pace), asked if I was an ex Red Arrows pilot!!
The biggest moment was as a kid with my mate on the back of the bike and after popping a wheelie off a speed bump, the front wheel detached and rolled off. I face planted and my mate landed on me. A few smashed teeth, holes in face, couple of days in Hospital and a three day loss of memory, I was fine.
Now I commute, there are plenty of near misses but I had a pretty similar incident to the OP on Waterloo bridge where I raced off and my chain had a better idea to wrap round my hub and lock the rear wheel. Not quite the damage the OP had but I did justify some new wheels from it.
Now I commute, there are plenty of near misses but I had a pretty similar incident to the OP on Waterloo bridge where I raced off and my chain had a better idea to wrap round my hub and lock the rear wheel. Not quite the damage the OP had but I did justify some new wheels from it.
curtisl said:
The biggest moment was as a kid with my mate on the back of the bike and after popping a wheelie off a speed bump.
I can't decide if you're showing your youth, or I'm showing my age on this one, but at the age of 45, I just have absolutely no memory of speed bumps even existing when I was a kid! 
2 up on a Raleigh Lizard going down Portway Hill in the wet isn't a good idea. Brakes not up to the job so no option but to hang a hard left at the bottom of the hill and hope.
I think the extra weight on the bike stopped me loosing traction and helped me take the corner but I won't be trying it again.
I think the extra weight on the bike stopped me loosing traction and helped me take the corner but I won't be trying it again.
Kermit power said:
curtisl said:
The biggest moment was as a kid with my mate on the back of the bike and after popping a wheelie off a speed bump.
I can't decide if you're showing your youth, or I'm showing my age on this one, but at the age of 45, I just have absolutely no memory of speed bumps even existing when I was a kid! I rattled down this little blighter on Sunday and had a bit of a 'punching buttons' moment on the turn into the s-bend, which doesn't look much on the map but certainly feels it when approached with gusto.
I suddenly had a feeling that I'd undercooked the initial turn-in, had to wind it over a bit more then felt the front was going to wash out on me (Strava says I was doing about 39mph) so I instinctively stiffened/sat up a little, which probably made things worse.
Needless to say it was just a fraction of a second of The Fear but my heart was going like the clappers at the bottom!
I noticed on the way down that some of my fellow riders with previous experience of that hill were using, shall we say, rather "more of the road" than I was, probably the reason they managed to shave 2-3s off my time and never felt like they were going to arrive at the bottom in a heap of bloody lycra and twisted bicycle!
I suddenly had a feeling that I'd undercooked the initial turn-in, had to wind it over a bit more then felt the front was going to wash out on me (Strava says I was doing about 39mph) so I instinctively stiffened/sat up a little, which probably made things worse.
Needless to say it was just a fraction of a second of The Fear but my heart was going like the clappers at the bottom!
I noticed on the way down that some of my fellow riders with previous experience of that hill were using, shall we say, rather "more of the road" than I was, probably the reason they managed to shave 2-3s off my time and never felt like they were going to arrive at the bottom in a heap of bloody lycra and twisted bicycle!
WinstonWolf said:
Front wheel fell out mid-wheelie on my old Chopper. I kept pedalling faster and faster to keep it airborne until the inevitable happened. Fortunately I made it to some grass before face planting big time...
Sorry, but that did make me laugh. Hope the eventual face plant wasn't too painful! O/T but I'm jealous of the Chopper. I was a little too young when they were out, and could only fit a Tomahawk. When I'd finally grown tall enough for a Chopper, Raleigh had stopped selling them in favour of the Grifter. So I still couldn't get a gear stick. Pah.
tless at some point.curtisl said:
Kermit power said:
curtisl said:
The biggest moment was as a kid with my mate on the back of the bike and after popping a wheelie off a speed bump.
I can't decide if you're showing your youth, or I'm showing my age on this one, but at the age of 45, I just have absolutely no memory of speed bumps even existing when I was a kid! 
This is on the Dartmoor Classic in June this year. Around 90 miles in, you're on the Moors, you know you've done all the climbing and it is meant to be a long fast run in to the finish. The road goes over a rise and there's quite a long descent with a gorgeous left hander at the bottom and a short sharp climb up the other side. You see the photographers on the corner, which probably should have rung alarm bells. There's no-one close behind, and nothing coming the other way, accelerate down the hill, check behind and up the hill the other side again, this is going to be amazing!
Except I missed the apex by at least a metre, ran out to the opposite side, stayed off the grass, went on the grass, got back on the Tarmac. I think I may have relaxed at that point, thinking I had saved the mother of all crashes, and then I don't know what happened. A tank slapper, and then I'm on my arse sliding on the road, and I finish up lying across the cranks with the pedal sticking into my chest. Brand new Morvelo shorts shredded, poured most of my water on my knees to get the worst of the gravel off, limped back to the finish. By the time I got there, the diluted blood had run down both legs and congealed, I looked like something from a zombie cycling film!
Not sure what my left leg is doing unclipped, can't see how that would have helped! There's the slightest amount of opposite lock to balance the leg maybe? I had been doing 50 mph in to the corner, it's changed my gung-ho downhill approach.
When me and my mate James Walsh were about 8 years old, we got chased by a jack russell along the road, we were on BMX Burners. We panicked and I think my pedal went in his spokes. We ended up in a heap in the middle of the road and the dog laughed and ran off. We just had minor bumps and grazes luckily 
Like others here, too many to be fun, but similar to the OP had a chain leave the big ring whilst giving it full beans up a short incline, probably doing around 50kmh. Had the predictable nuts/top tube interface moment, but more worrying was that as I was now leaning on the handlebars with my chest I couldn't steer properly and was heading towards some pedestrians. They moved, and I was then heading towards armco, which was a bit scary.
At the last moment, my weight shifted, I headed back into the road and drafted to a halt on the centre line, just before a v sharp right-hander. Pedestrians helped me get to the pavement and bring my heartrate back to something less rodent-like.
Checked the bike over and found the problem to be loose bolts on the chain rings, causing them to wobble under load. Lucky it happened where it did, could've been nasty...
Other one that springs to ind was a double puncture just after cresting the hill at Dundry - for those that know it, that was a close call. And a long walk home.
At the last moment, my weight shifted, I headed back into the road and drafted to a halt on the centre line, just before a v sharp right-hander. Pedestrians helped me get to the pavement and bring my heartrate back to something less rodent-like.
Checked the bike over and found the problem to be loose bolts on the chain rings, causing them to wobble under load. Lucky it happened where it did, could've been nasty...
Other one that springs to ind was a double puncture just after cresting the hill at Dundry - for those that know it, that was a close call. And a long walk home.
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