People locked into a behavioural cycle.
Discussion
How many folks here know people who are locked into screamingly obvious cycles of behaviour that they refuse to acknowledge even when it's pointed out repeatedly?
A pal of mine is irresistably attracted and attractive to scum. Every person he's hooked up with or allowed into his life in recent years has either done him over properly or turned out to be a violent maniac.
It's gotten so now that I refuse to go out with him or meet one single new person. When he tells me about his latest beloved or new best friend I roll my eyes, tell him how it's going to pan out and am correct to within a week every time.
When it's all gone up in smoke again he tells me to inform him when it's happening again. When he's informed that I do every single time he chuckles and tells me to REALLY tell him this time.
I don't think I can be arsed with someone addicted to destroying their own life any more.
I presume a fair few know people like this. How many, if any, managed to break out of it?
A pal of mine is irresistably attracted and attractive to scum. Every person he's hooked up with or allowed into his life in recent years has either done him over properly or turned out to be a violent maniac.
It's gotten so now that I refuse to go out with him or meet one single new person. When he tells me about his latest beloved or new best friend I roll my eyes, tell him how it's going to pan out and am correct to within a week every time.
When it's all gone up in smoke again he tells me to inform him when it's happening again. When he's informed that I do every single time he chuckles and tells me to REALLY tell him this time.
I don't think I can be arsed with someone addicted to destroying their own life any more.
I presume a fair few know people like this. How many, if any, managed to break out of it?
Perhaps a weird comparison but I remember watching the original Jamie Oliver 15 programme.
One of the things I remember there were a few kids that were given a golden opportunity that so many would have given everything for yet seemed to do everything in their power to balls it up, and they did. Why? Scorpion and frog...
Often those who need the most help don't want helping.
One of the things I remember there were a few kids that were given a golden opportunity that so many would have given everything for yet seemed to do everything in their power to balls it up, and they did. Why? Scorpion and frog...
Often those who need the most help don't want helping.
tty end of the stick.
bloomen said:
How many folks here know people who are locked into screamingly obvious cycles of behaviour that they refuse to acknowledge even when it's pointed out repeatedly?
A pal of mine is irresistably attracted and attractive to scum. Every person he's hooked up with or allowed into his life in recent years has either done him over properly or turned out to be a violent maniac.
It's gotten so now that I refuse to go out with him or meet one single new person. When he tells me about his latest beloved or new best friend I roll my eyes, tell him how it's going to pan out and am correct to within a week every time.
When it's all gone up in smoke again he tells me to inform him when it's happening again. When he's informed that I do every single time he chuckles and tells me to REALLY tell him this time.
I don't think I can be arsed with someone addicted to destroying their own life any more.
I presume a fair few know people like this. How many, if any, managed to break out of it?
Last year I used to hang around with someone similar. We fell out few months back, primarily was because I was concerned for the way their life was heading. And that help was apparently not actually wanted (Though the person had dropped massive hints indirectly asking for help! A pal of mine is irresistably attracted and attractive to scum. Every person he's hooked up with or allowed into his life in recent years has either done him over properly or turned out to be a violent maniac.
It's gotten so now that I refuse to go out with him or meet one single new person. When he tells me about his latest beloved or new best friend I roll my eyes, tell him how it's going to pan out and am correct to within a week every time.
When it's all gone up in smoke again he tells me to inform him when it's happening again. When he's informed that I do every single time he chuckles and tells me to REALLY tell him this time.
I don't think I can be arsed with someone addicted to destroying their own life any more.
I presume a fair few know people like this. How many, if any, managed to break out of it?
Story is too long for this thread ) It hurts to see people you care about constantly doing stupid things, but at the end of the day assuming they are not mentally deficient, you have to let them live their life. (Always offer help if its an occasional thing of course)
But more accurately, YOU have to live YOUR life. There's no point in ruining your mood as a result of others choices. Control the things you can control. You never know, you cutting back significantly on contact may make them realise what they are doing.
I wouldn't count on it though. Leopards and Spots.
We know a couple like this, they've been friends for years and decided to get together and eventually moved in with each other after 3 months. They constantly argue, he's a drunk, she's always ill (does have a medical condition, can't remember name).
They've split up maybe 6-7 times over the last 12 months beacause he gets aggresive when drunk (most days), we'd always get involved and try to help. This stopped at the end of last year when they had their biggest fight yet, won't go into details but it was quite bad and the rozzers were involved, we'd basically had enough of it. I've genuine belief that they love the drama and I no longer want anything to do with it, so yes OP! Sorta know where your coming from!
They've split up maybe 6-7 times over the last 12 months beacause he gets aggresive when drunk (most days), we'd always get involved and try to help. This stopped at the end of last year when they had their biggest fight yet, won't go into details but it was quite bad and the rozzers were involved, we'd basically had enough of it. I've genuine belief that they love the drama and I no longer want anything to do with it, so yes OP! Sorta know where your coming from!
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