How old is too old to parent
Discussion
Hi all,
My wife and I have been planning a family for a few years.
However, she had a medical condition that prevented us from starting our family.
Now this condition is completely out of the way, there is no reason for her not to come off the contraception, and for me to do my seeding.
The thing is, I feel that I am getting older, and have 3 children all grown up from previous marriage.
Eldest is 35 'ish.
So is 59 too old to start with nappies again, my wife really wants, and has said she would be more than happy with just one little one running around the house.
To add, I am fit, healthy, no medications etc.
My wife and I have been planning a family for a few years.
However, she had a medical condition that prevented us from starting our family.
Now this condition is completely out of the way, there is no reason for her not to come off the contraception, and for me to do my seeding.
The thing is, I feel that I am getting older, and have 3 children all grown up from previous marriage.
Eldest is 35 'ish.
So is 59 too old to start with nappies again, my wife really wants, and has said she would be more than happy with just one little one running around the house.
To add, I am fit, healthy, no medications etc.
uk_vette said:
Hi all,
My wife and I have been planning a family for a few years.
However, she had a medical condition that prevented us from starting our family.
Now this condition is completely out of the way, there is no reason for her not to come off the contraception, and for me to do my seeding.
The thing is, I feel that I am getting older, and have 3 children all grown up from previous marriage.
Eldest is 35 'ish.
So is 59 too old to start with nappies again, my wife really wants, and has said she would be more than happy with just one little one running around the house.
To add, I am fit, healthy, no medications etc.
I would say it is very dependent on your financial situation. At 59, if you project forward, the child could arrive at 60 for you. So, at 75, your child would be 15 and in university you are facing 80. If your wife has a good career or you have a significant post retirement income, then you might be able to do it. I have a friend who has done this, and the financial burdens are not insignificant My wife and I have been planning a family for a few years.
However, she had a medical condition that prevented us from starting our family.
Now this condition is completely out of the way, there is no reason for her not to come off the contraception, and for me to do my seeding.
The thing is, I feel that I am getting older, and have 3 children all grown up from previous marriage.
Eldest is 35 'ish.
So is 59 too old to start with nappies again, my wife really wants, and has said she would be more than happy with just one little one running around the house.
To add, I am fit, healthy, no medications etc.
I believe it is too old. You are at the stage in life you should be enjoying your relationship with your wife as a couple, not as a family. However if she strongly wants a child, then that may not be possible, as it sounds she is much younger than you, so at a different stage in her life.
The idea of being tied for the next 18 years at 59 does not sound a good idea to me. You will be nearly 80 when you a free to do what you want with your wife. Think about it.
My perspective, but I can be selfish.
The idea of being tied for the next 18 years at 59 does not sound a good idea to me. You will be nearly 80 when you a free to do what you want with your wife. Think about it.
My perspective, but I can be selfish.
Blaster72 said:
el stovey said:
A diagram sometimes helps.
I know someone who had a second family in his mid/late 50's.
He said it was much easier at this age as there isn't the life/career pressures as when it was in his 20's/30's.
If you can afford it, you are healthy, you see yourself being around for the next 20 odd years and it's something you want to do then go for it.
He said it was much easier at this age as there isn't the life/career pressures as when it was in his 20's/30's.
If you can afford it, you are healthy, you see yourself being around for the next 20 odd years and it's something you want to do then go for it.
It's up to you and your Mrs of course but at that age, life is enjoyable because you have more disposable income and lots of freedom. Fancy a city break at short notice, no problem. Sports car, yup. I'd think long and hard before giving that up! I'm 41 and my 2nd son was born at the end of December after a 15 year gap. We've had one night out in that time, a dinner party with friends and we had to take baby with us as we got let down. He's gorgeous and I don't regret having him but the selfish part of me sometimes thinks how much easier life was before (especially at 4am).
I'd say it was far too old to be bringing children up. I remember when I was at primary school I had a friend who's parents must have been well into their fifties, and it made it look like he lived with his grandparents. No idea why but it made me feel odd, something which has stuck with me today as at thirty-three I'm getting itchy feet to have kids so that I don't end up in the same situation.
Probably says more about me though rather than an opinion, and may come from the fact my parents had me when they were very early twenties so were very young in comparison.
Probably says more about me though rather than an opinion, and may come from the fact my parents had me when they were very early twenties so were very young in comparison.
Blaster72 said:
You know the times when you understand exactly what you mean but no one else does? Well this is one of them.
Sorry thought it was pretty straight forward, it's a chart showing a human lifespan in years and one in months. I've shown how far the op is along it for both. Those are the green boxes.
Sometimes seeing time laid out like this, or in a calendar can help people plan stuff better.
My parents were 40 when I was born and I think that was too old, they would disagree. I repeated their mistake and adopted at 44 and that was a bad idea, she is grown up now and away.
You may have special abilities and more patience than I have but it really isnt easy and even on the child not having younger parents.
But good luck in whatever you decide.
You may have special abilities and more patience than I have but it really isnt easy and even on the child not having younger parents.
But good luck in whatever you decide.
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