Do you tell your other half what you spend your money on?
Poll: Do you tell your other half what you spend your money on?
Total Members Polled: 240
Discussion
As the title states. Do you always reveals to your partner what you spend your money on regardless of the amount (or expect the same the other way), or is it just ok to go ahead and do your own thing without talking about it?
(Just to clarify, we're not talking about demanding what the final outcome is but simply discussing it).
(Just to clarify, we're not talking about demanding what the final outcome is but simply discussing it).
We only have joint accounts so we pretty much know what the other spends. All our money goes into one pot and we both spend from that pot.
We don't discuss everything before hand of course - either of us can still go out and spend on pretty much what we like - but big stuff is usually discussed beforehand (unless it's a prezzie for the other).
We don't discuss everything before hand of course - either of us can still go out and spend on pretty much what we like - but big stuff is usually discussed beforehand (unless it's a prezzie for the other).
Edited by Moonhawk on Monday 4th April 01:24
My partner and I both do what we want with our money, it' all goes into the same pot and we share it. We would probably tell the other one if we were going to buy something largish or interesting but it's not to ask permission, I can't imagine any one in a normal relationship forbidding the other from doing something, that doesn't sound very healthy,
i.e. We would probably think itt odd if either one just went and spent a thousand pounds on something without mentioning it beforehand.
It's just about respect and equality really.
i.e. We would probably think itt odd if either one just went and spent a thousand pounds on something without mentioning it beforehand.
It's just about respect and equality really.
We have incomes going into separate bank accounts and then a joint account for bills and stuff.
We also have 'spending money' that is our monthly disposable income for whatever we want without needing to justify anything.
For other stuff like going out, household purchases or large items I usually just hand over my card as I earn more. Works pretty well.
We also have 'spending money' that is our monthly disposable income for whatever we want without needing to justify anything.
For other stuff like going out, household purchases or large items I usually just hand over my card as I earn more. Works pretty well.
Yes, we talk about larger (£1k+ as a general rule I suppose) purchases however I don't feel the need to justify everything I spend my money on (and vice versa).
Often I'll get very [overly] excited about something I've bought for £5 so that would be discussed - much to her annoyance!
ETA: [future]MrsBarry123 is the voice of reason/sensibility/normality in our relationship so I find myself consulting her more often as we get older!
Often I'll get very [overly] excited about something I've bought for £5 so that would be discussed - much to her annoyance!

ETA: [future]MrsBarry123 is the voice of reason/sensibility/normality in our relationship so I find myself consulting her more often as we get older!
Sure about big stuff but no need to deal with daily things. If I want to buy a car for instance of course we discuss it. Stuff like clothes and so on, not at all, Joint account for all household stuff anyway,we have different investment account, but she sees them as there are monthly statements and I have no concern that she knows the financial picture. Neither of us is into control nonsense,,just sensible discussion. Neither of us would imagine vetoing an expenditure.
I find its better to ask for forgiveness then to ask for permission.
OH doesnt really mind what I spend it on as long as Im not being too excessive, but as I earn a lot more than her, I have more disposable income, so usually the best way I find is to spend it on her first then sneak my new toy in later when not looking.
OH doesnt really mind what I spend it on as long as Im not being too excessive, but as I earn a lot more than her, I have more disposable income, so usually the best way I find is to spend it on her first then sneak my new toy in later when not looking.
el stovey said:
My partner and I both do what we want with our money, it' all goes into the same pot and we share it. We would probably tell the other one if we were going to buy something largish or interesting but it's not to ask permission, I can't imagine any one in a normal relationship forbidding the other from doing something, that doesn't sound very healthy,
i.e. We would probably think itt odd if either one just went and spent a thousand pounds on something without mentioning it beforehand.
It's just about respect and equality really.
This. It's our money and it seems rude to spunk large amounts on me without asking. Besides, she earns most of it. i.e. We would probably think itt odd if either one just went and spent a thousand pounds on something without mentioning it beforehand.
It's just about respect and equality really.

4x4Tyke said:
Didn't economic abuse become illegal last year, as I understand it you now have the right to spend your money on what you want without needing the wife's approval. 
You must have missed the memo about that legislation only applies one way, ie men do the economic abuse and women are the victims! 

I find the poll options slightly concerning. Where is the option for "I can do what I like with my own money, but often talk about it with my partner because I believe in having a transparent relationship and value her opinion"?
No wonder divorce rates are so high these days if this is indicative of the general populous!
No wonder divorce rates are so high these days if this is indicative of the general populous!
MrBig said:
I find the poll options slightly concerning. Where is the option for "I can do what I like with my own money, but often talk about it with my partner because I believe in having a transparent relationship and value her opinion"?
No wonder divorce rates are so high these days if this is indicative of the general populous!
Your missus has your loginNo wonder divorce rates are so high these days if this is indicative of the general populous!
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