How did you know it was over?
Discussion
Its a bit of string question, as the tipping point is subjective.
Mine was the point where I realised that regardless of the effort I made, it was obviously dead on her end, which pushed the cons of losing (some) access to the children, financing another home and child support to the other end of the seesaw. Basically when not putting up with the faults overcame inertia.
Mine was the point where I realised that regardless of the effort I made, it was obviously dead on her end, which pushed the cons of losing (some) access to the children, financing another home and child support to the other end of the seesaw. Basically when not putting up with the faults overcame inertia.
She told me. I then did some snooping and discovered that despite her protestations to me, my daughter, her own mother and our friends, she was actually seeing someone else and had been for a while. I doubt his wife or their three kids were too excited about that news either.
Nice way to end a decade and a half of unconditionally loving someone.
Nice way to end a decade and a half of unconditionally loving someone.
My ex started complaining about all stupid things. Complained I never did housework, despite I did it everyday. If it was 9pm she would phone me to see why I was not home. This was at 20 years old. Had to be home for 10pm. She use to try and check me in the you know where to see if i had been cheating. Broke up and she tried to take the house that was in my name.
Fast forward near ten years later and she was now living with her "soul mate" but spent all her time talking to me and how she regrets she never tried harder and still loved me. Kept referring to her partner as her soul mate yet was meeting up with me behind his back. I never slept with her but she wanted it. Know she had a partner, I would not do that to some other fella who had no idea as I would hate it done to me.
Years past and I by sheer luck found a photo on a porn site of her with some bloke. Nut job.
Fast forward near ten years later and she was now living with her "soul mate" but spent all her time talking to me and how she regrets she never tried harder and still loved me. Kept referring to her partner as her soul mate yet was meeting up with me behind his back. I never slept with her but she wanted it. Know she had a partner, I would not do that to some other fella who had no idea as I would hate it done to me.
Years past and I by sheer luck found a photo on a porn site of her with some bloke. Nut job.
burritoNinja said:
My ex started complaining about all stupid things. Complained I never did housework, despite I did it everyday. If it was 9pm she would phone me to see why I was not home. This was at 20 years old. Had to be home for 10pm. She use to try and check me in the you know where to see if i had been cheating. Broke up and she tried to take the house that was in my name.
Fast forward near ten years later and she was now living with her "soul mate" but spent all her time talking to me and how she regrets she never tried harder and still loved me. Kept referring to her partner as her soul mate yet was meeting up with me behind his back. I never slept with her but she wanted it. Know she had a partner, I would not do that to some other fella who had no idea as I would hate it done to me.
Years past and I by sheer luck found a photo on a porn site of her with some bloke. Nut job.
Sheer luck? HmmmFast forward near ten years later and she was now living with her "soul mate" but spent all her time talking to me and how she regrets she never tried harder and still loved me. Kept referring to her partner as her soul mate yet was meeting up with me behind his back. I never slept with her but she wanted it. Know she had a partner, I would not do that to some other fella who had no idea as I would hate it done to me.
Years past and I by sheer luck found a photo on a porn site of her with some bloke. Nut job.
I call stalker
hajaba123 said:
Relationship/ marriage etc.
How did you know and did you handle it right?
Asking for a friend/ no pics/ etc etc
Well.. lets see....How did you know and did you handle it right?
Asking for a friend/ no pics/ etc etc
A long time ago mind... but here we go...
1/ A girl I was seeing... unknown to me was seeing one of my best friends also.
They were only rumbled when I almost caught them snogging
They would have gotten away with it... but when he withdrew her teeth brace was attached to his lip.
2/ Another girl I was seeing... unknown to me was seeing one of my best friends also.
Everybody else in our crowd knew - but no-one had the cahonas to tell me.
Until I found out by accident - ( but not in a comedy skit way as above )
Anyway.... they are married now - and I get on great with them
3/ Another girl I was seeing... i felt it wasn't going well. I was going to break it off at the next weekend.
She must have sensed something wasn't right...
... Anyway... she phoned me to tell me the was pregnant and was keeping it.
I drove around straight away... and said.. "Right... we tell you folks tonight, we go around and tell mine also, and I'll stand by you."
She looked startled and said "I'm not pregnant. I just wanted to see how you would respond, and if you walked away - I could tell my friends you were an evil s
t'It goes on an on...
I dont quite remember the tipping point, but we had been stuck in a place for quite a few years where we had both said to each other "if it werent for the kids/owning a house together, id be gone". We struggled on and tried to make it somewhat work, you know, for the kids.. But at that point it was clear as day for me that there would come a day that one of us would end it, and i'd have my life back. If you are in a serious relationship (in terms of commitment/entanglement), and your image of the future doesnt involve you two sticking together... you are done, your heart is somewhere else and you are clinging to a dead horse because of sentimental and/or practical reasons.
That day came this February (valentines day to be exact), she had been somewhat getting involved with another man (all with my knowing and permission mind, she felt she wanted to do that, and i didnt want to stand in her way, i felt i had no right to, considering how little the relationship meant to both of us at that point), and decided she wanted to continue with him. I agreed with ending it, it had been something we discussed before anyway, and the feeling were long gone. One thing that had held me back for quite a while was that i wasnt sure whether she could take care for herself and the kids (she'd have em most of the time), but with said other man... (who seemed like a decent bloke at the time), that worry was gone for me.
That day came this February (valentines day to be exact), she had been somewhat getting involved with another man (all with my knowing and permission mind, she felt she wanted to do that, and i didnt want to stand in her way, i felt i had no right to, considering how little the relationship meant to both of us at that point), and decided she wanted to continue with him. I agreed with ending it, it had been something we discussed before anyway, and the feeling were long gone. One thing that had held me back for quite a while was that i wasnt sure whether she could take care for herself and the kids (she'd have em most of the time), but with said other man... (who seemed like a decent bloke at the time), that worry was gone for me.
I had my suspicions that he was seeing someone else - he changed his appearance, and started 'popping out' without telling me where he was going. Then there were the phone calls to the landline and if I answered they hung up. She wasn't even smart enough to withhold the number, so I knew who it was 
Found some other evidence (not well hidden) that he was planning to move out. When it came to a head, I asked him outright whether anyone else was involved. He denied it six or more times. I then told him to get out, as he was obviously already planning to leave. That was on the evening of our fifth wedding anniversary (nice timing, eh?) He had to go to his mother's
In the end, I found out that he had been having an affair for three months with the wife of a friend from work. I knew, really, just didn't want to believe that he could be that duplicitous. I've said all along that I would have had more respect for him if he'd admitted it from the beginning and suggested that we split. They got married shortly afterwards and now have at least three children. I was single (and intended to stay that way) for 12 years until I met my current OH 6 years ago.
They really weren't terribly bright - I even found out that my brother had seen them together in a local pub at one point
Found some other evidence (not well hidden) that he was planning to move out. When it came to a head, I asked him outright whether anyone else was involved. He denied it six or more times. I then told him to get out, as he was obviously already planning to leave. That was on the evening of our fifth wedding anniversary (nice timing, eh?) He had to go to his mother's
In the end, I found out that he had been having an affair for three months with the wife of a friend from work. I knew, really, just didn't want to believe that he could be that duplicitous. I've said all along that I would have had more respect for him if he'd admitted it from the beginning and suggested that we split. They got married shortly afterwards and now have at least three children. I was single (and intended to stay that way) for 12 years until I met my current OH 6 years ago.
They really weren't terribly bright - I even found out that my brother had seen them together in a local pub at one point
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