Problem with very horny neighbour
Problem with very horny neighbour
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Discussion

Janesy B

Original Poster:

2,625 posts

216 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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I have neighbours who run a father/son plumbing and decorating business. Never had a good relationship with them, ranging from them throwing rubbish into our garden, leaning old water tanks against our fence - any attempts of polite discussion often quickly descends to either the father/son threatening to hit me so I don't talk to them. No issues with other neighbours so I don't think I am an asshole (maybe there's some people that would disagree).

They have also had issues with their neighbour on the other side due to messing about with the party wall, and when confronted that also turned quite ugly with pushing and shoving out in the street. So by all means a pair of retards.

The latest problem is they have now had their van fitted with an alarm which beeps the horn when it is armed. The frequency in which they feel the need to lock their van, especially if either myself or my father is outside has increased tenfold in the last couple of weeks.

This has started because a few weeks ago they had a visitor that came and went a few times, each time beeping the horn when they pulled up to the drive, after the third time I politely (didn't shout OI fk OFF even if I wanted to) asked that she refrained from doing this, seeing as I was working under a car the other side of the fence and I did a bit of a poo when the horn went off a few metres from my head. Instead of apologising the woman was dismissive and rude, she has obviously told the neighbours this happened.

Is there much I can do, because this is bordering on harassment - especially when you see one of them standing in the porch waiting for you to walk up to your house before arming the alarm three times in a row. I'm not going to talk to either the father or the son because this is a waste of time.


vixen1700

29,255 posts

300 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Thread title didn't deliver. frown

750turbo

6,164 posts

254 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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OP - Totally - Totally ignore them.

Life is too short without worrying about next doors bampots.

edo

16,699 posts

295 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Any complaint or confrontation will only exacerbate the issue.

The best most disarming solution? Be super nice to them. Smile, say hello. Do something nice; pick something up, help them in some way; fix a bit of fence that is actually theirs or something; it completely take the wind out of aholes sails.

TR4man

5,542 posts

204 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Why is the neighbour "horny"?

CX53

3,025 posts

140 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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People like that will only understand a smack in the mouth unfortunately.

X5TUU

12,788 posts

217 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
All our Audis do this (synthetic beep, rather than a toot of the horn) one beep on arm, two on disarm ... Personally I really like them doing this audible feature as they are always parked outside of line of sight but I can hear them when I check they are armed ... and its a feature of pretty much every car I have ever rented in the US

You need to relax a little lol

Dave Hedgehog

16,366 posts

234 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
X5TUU said:
All our Audis do this (synthetic beep, rather than a toot of the horn) one beep on arm, two on disarm ... Personally I really like them doing this audible feature as they are always parked outside of line of sight but I can hear them when I check they are armed ... and its a feature of pretty much every car I have ever rented in the US

You need to relax a little lol
it can be disabled

X5TUU

12,788 posts

217 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
Dave Hedgehog said:
X5TUU said:
All our Audis do this (synthetic beep, rather than a toot of the horn) one beep on arm, two on disarm ... Personally I really like them doing this audible feature as they are always parked outside of line of sight but I can hear them when I check they are armed ... and its a feature of pretty much every car I have ever rented in the US

You need to relax a little lol
it can be disabled
Yeah I know, I activated it on them all

Janesy B

Original Poster:

2,625 posts

216 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
X5TUU said:
All our Audis do this (synthetic beep, rather than a toot of the horn) one beep on arm, two on disarm ... Personally I really like them doing this audible feature as they are always parked outside of line of sight but I can hear them when I check they are armed ... and its a feature of pretty much every car I have ever rented in the US

You need to relax a little lol
Well it must have pulled down a software update from the moon or something because it only ever beeped once, now it's totally random. It's not an Audi either, it's a 10 year old Transit with an after market alarm.

PhillipM

6,564 posts

219 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Dig two holes in the garden 6ft long where they can see them, fill with fresh soil. Make a point of avoiding the subject if they ask what they were.

CX53

3,025 posts

140 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Inb4-

Hammer frozen sausages in to their lawn

dvs_dave

9,040 posts

255 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Isn't this a perfect opportunity for the frozen sausages hammered into his front lawn PH jolly jape?

Janesy B

Original Poster:

2,625 posts

216 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
When they bought the house every square inch of the front garden was concreted over.

djneils98

341 posts

180 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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PhillipM said:
Dig two holes in the garden 6ft long where they can see them, fill with fresh soil. Make a point of avoiding the subject if they ask what they were.
^^^ this smile

whoami

13,201 posts

270 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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Janesy B said:
When they bought the house every square inch of the front garden was concreted over.
You need to refer this to the council thread.

Johnnybee

2,499 posts

251 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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On the Transit if the doors aren't closed correctly the horn honks to let you know. One of the door sensors might be kaput and giving a false alarm every time they lock the van.

Rubin215

4,201 posts

186 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
Sneak out at night and set fire to it?
Maybe their next van won't have the same annoying feature...

ruggedscotty

5,998 posts

239 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
quotequote all
PhillipM said:
Dig two holes in the garden 6ft long where they can see them, fill with fresh soil. Make a point of avoiding the subject if they ask what they were.
Yeah I did similar to this a few years ago now - just the one hole in a back yard. Dug the hole then pulled a roll of carpet out of the van and placed into hole and filled it up. Obviously i knew where their cctv cameras were and I ensured that it was captured and then hosed down the area.... really did the works lol

Ended up with the police arriving then it got weird as it was dug up by forensic specalists. When they found nothing I was released. after a talking to by the police. Anyways It did the trick as neighbours moved on in a few months....

out wierd them if you can. generally st them up. and wind them back. these folks tend to not like being stood up to.

Sheepshanks

41,250 posts

149 months

Saturday 13th August 2016
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I have no idea which law would cover it but I have a Merc and people often ask about enabling the confirmation beep and are told it's illegal in the UK. I've read it's illegal in the whole EU but the unofficial Merc solution is to code the car for the Netherlands, so the EU bit can't be right.

The local council can take action under noise nuisance regs if the alarm is going off, but doubt the confirmation beep would be enough.