Moles - The Final Soultion,

[sparkythecat]

We've had a couple of threads on here lately on how to get rid of moles.

www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?f=141&h=&t=160516

www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?t=101503&f=23&h=0

However , I cannot believe that the PH Massive between us didn't come up with the solution proffered by a canny septuganarian down my local last night, which he claims has been successful on more than one occasion.

1. Carefully poke a stick in the ground near to moleys latest hill until you find where his tunnel is.
Using a trowel dig down to the tunnel and put in the end of a hosepipe.

2. Carfully backfill your excavation taking care to seal around the hosepipe.

3. Now, and here's the clever bit, (which we should have thought of) - connect the other end of hosepipe to the car exhaust! Give it 10 mins to make sure you've got enough CO down there to do the job.

Hey presto! Moley falls quietly to sleep and doesn't wake up again.


Ingenious!

So now the only question is which engine to use.

Lotus twin cam
Rover V8
BMW straight 6

What do you think?



>>> Edited by sparkythecat on Thursday 10th March 16:05

[Alex]

One without a cat.

[AC79xxx]

Whichever is the loudest so you deafen the little fr too

[BliarOut]

Ingenious in it's simplicity

Use the one with the biggest displacement to help moley "sleep" quickly

[Beaconbouy]

Alex said:

One without a cat.

I hope that wasn't a silent but violent, because it stank.

[Beaconbouy]

AC79xxx said:

Whichever is the loudest so you deafen the little fr too

Deaf and blind, now its dumb, I'm sure the CO will help

[moosepig]

Beaconbouy said:

Deaf and blind, now its dumb

but it sure plays a mean pinball

[sadako]

There is one thing more satisfying than killing the moles, getting them to dig up your neighbor's garden.

Get an old speaker from the market, cut the cone off but leave the diaphragm on it. Attach it to a broom handle hammered into the lawn and play loud bassy music on it, Bury the tweeters in the mole hole for good measure

[lanciachris]

Have we had the link to a very old scoobynet thread on moles? it was comedy gold if we can find it

[FunkyNige]

I would've suggested that in the other thread if it actually worked... We tried that (sort of, we burnt some paper and blew the smoke down the hole). Didn't work so killed the blighter.

[YarisSi]

Don't kill the little darlings. You lot are softies worrying about your lawn.

[FunkyNige]

YarisSi said:

Don't kill the little darlings. You lot are softies worrying about your lawn.

I worry more about my ankles when I stand on a tunnel...

[Flat in Fifth]

sadako said:

There is one thing more satisfying than killing the moles, getting them to dig up your neighbor's garden. Get an old speaker from the market, cut the cone off but leave the diaphragm on it. Attach it to a broom handle hammered into the lawn and play loud bassy music on it, Bury the tweeters in the mole hole for good measure

nah!!!! Sure fire method, pour some nice smelly diesel down the hole(s). They sod off next door and don't come back, works every time.

[Dibble]

But why would any self respecting PHer HAVE diesel, FiF?

[Flat in Fifth]

Dibble said:

But why would any self respecting PHer HAVE diesel, FiF?

errrr ... shuffles feet in embarrassment ... errrr

Marine diesel ..... phew!

[Trooper2]

Alex said:

One without a cat.

And pull off a spark plug wire so that if the CO's don't get him the Hydrocarbons will.