Dementia and driving
Discussion
Looking for some advice on Dementia and driving.
My dad has dementia and has just had a letter for a medical assessment to allow him to continue to drive.
It is reasonably advanced. He is capable of driving but requires my mum to be with him to tell him which way to go. She can't drive so she wants him to take the test so they are both mobile. Is he likely to fail if he needs my mum to be with him to drive?
Please note I think that he shouldn't be allowed to drive so I am looking for a reason to tell my mum not to even have him assessed.
Sadly, this is all too common. Your mother may not look at the situation in an objective enough way, as I'm sure you already realise. I can't help from a personal perspective, as my relative with dementia gave up driving long before she became a danger on the roads.
If you haven't done already, I strongly suggest having a chat with The Alzheimers Society, as they are very helpful. There is some specific information about driving and dementia here:
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documen...
Also, have a look around their Talking Point forum, as I've read several threads there discussing the situation you're going through and how to cope.
Good luck.
If you haven't done already, I strongly suggest having a chat with The Alzheimers Society, as they are very helpful. There is some specific information about driving and dementia here:
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documen...
Also, have a look around their Talking Point forum, as I've read several threads there discussing the situation you're going through and how to cope.
Good luck.
FurtiveFreddy said:
Sadly, this is all too common. Your mother may not look at the situation in an objective enough way, as I'm sure you already realise. I can't help from a personal perspective, as my relative with dementia gave up driving long before she became a danger on the roads.
If you haven't done already, I strongly suggest having a chat with The Alzheimers Society, as they are very helpful. There is some specific information about driving and dementia here:
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documen...
Also, have a look around their Talking Point forum, as I've read several threads there discussing the situation you're going through and how to cope.
Good luck.
Thanks, very useful link, have downloaded the pdf. I will go through it with my mum.If you haven't done already, I strongly suggest having a chat with The Alzheimers Society, as they are very helpful. There is some specific information about driving and dementia here:
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documen...
Also, have a look around their Talking Point forum, as I've read several threads there discussing the situation you're going through and how to cope.
Good luck.
tapereel said:
If it is an assessment it might come to the conclusion that he can't drive.
It should but my concern is he occasionally gets disorientated and it worries me that my dad won't say anything as he won't even remember he gets disorientated.The pdf link in the previous post was really good. Points out that memory is not the only issue, other aspects of driving skill are lost with dementia.
Convinces me he should in no way be driving and I will tell my mum that
hstewie said:Another aspect of dementia which should be considered, is that the sufferer will have 'good' days and 'bad' days. i.e. on some good days, particularly if conversing with a stranger or a professional person such as a doctor, they can come across as completely normal and unimpaired. A standard memory test may not show there's too much wrong either.
An assessment is just a snapshot of how they are at that particular moment. A few days later they may not be able to cope with even simple tasks or forget where they are and why they are there.
This is why a single assessment may not bring the results you want.
I'd suggest spending more time explaining to your mum how dangerous it will be for both of them and others around them if he continues driving, regardless of what an assessment might conclude.
An assessment is just a snapshot of how they are at that particular moment. A few days later they may not be able to cope with even simple tasks or forget where they are and why they are there.
This is why a single assessment may not bring the results you want.
I'd suggest spending more time explaining to your mum how dangerous it will be for both of them and others around them if he continues driving, regardless of what an assessment might conclude.
FurtiveFreddy said:
Another aspect of dementia which should be considered, is that the sufferer will have 'good' days and 'bad' days. i.e. on some good days, particularly if conversing with a stranger or a professional person such as a doctor, they can come across as completely normal and unimpaired. A standard memory test may not show there's too much wrong either.
An assessment is just a snapshot of how they are at that particular moment. A few days later they may not be able to cope with even simple tasks or forget where they are and why they are there.
This is why a single assessment may not bring the results you want.
I'd suggest spending more time explaining to your mum how dangerous it will be for both of them and others around them if he continues driving, regardless of what an assessment might conclude.
Thanks for the advice.An assessment is just a snapshot of how they are at that particular moment. A few days later they may not be able to cope with even simple tasks or forget where they are and why they are there.
This is why a single assessment may not bring the results you want.
I'd suggest spending more time explaining to your mum how dangerous it will be for both of them and others around them if he continues driving, regardless of what an assessment might conclude.
After a good session with my mum tonight she has agreed - no driving.
Sad really, I don't take any pleasure in it, it's his one area left of relative independence but it has to be done
Agree with the above.
What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
UpTheIron said:
Agree with the above.
What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
As it happens I used the same argument. It would cost them less to use a taxi than the cost of running their car, especially as he only drives on Saturday lunch and Sunday morning to go to a local café meeting up with old friends.What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
ant leigh said:
Thanks for the advice.
After a good session with my mum tonight she has agreed - no driving.
Sad really, I don't take any pleasure in it, it's his one area left of relative independence but it has to be done
We have been through this with my father, I won't go into the details, however he never had the chance to give up his licence voluntarily and that hurt him more than losing it. If your father can be persuaded to relinquish it himself it becomes something he has controlled and can have some dignity about.After a good session with my mum tonight she has agreed - no driving.
Sad really, I don't take any pleasure in it, it's his one area left of relative independence but it has to be done
It really depends what is meant by an assessment, is it an appointment with a GP.OT or consultant to discuss driving with some desktop tests thrown in, is it a local authority one or is it one arranged by the DVLA. The first two may be advisory but the latter will be a much longer one and will result in either licensing for a year or revocation.
If there are concerns about driving then surrender is a much more dignified process than revocation. They cannot take into account the presence of a 'co-pilot' or sat nav. The driver must be independent and really should be able to drive any car on any road. Lots of areas are affected in dementia, visio-spatial skills, anticipation, coping with multiple inputs e.g. at roundabouts or junctions, it's not just memory. The drivers insight into the problem is also affected unfortunately and they may be unaware of the difficulties & dangers.
If there are concerns about driving then surrender is a much more dignified process than revocation. They cannot take into account the presence of a 'co-pilot' or sat nav. The driver must be independent and really should be able to drive any car on any road. Lots of areas are affected in dementia, visio-spatial skills, anticipation, coping with multiple inputs e.g. at roundabouts or junctions, it's not just memory. The drivers insight into the problem is also affected unfortunately and they may be unaware of the difficulties & dangers.
ant leigh said:
UpTheIron said:
Agree with the above.
What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
As it happens I used the same argument. It would cost them less to use a taxi than the cost of running their car, especially as he only drives on Saturday lunch and Sunday morning to go to a local café meeting up with old friends.What is your mother's motivation? Getting out and about I expect. But realistically how many journeys do they make and how much will it cost by taxi?
Just had a similar (although not dementia related) conversation with my father. 1 mile walk to the pub to see his mates and sometimes doesn't feel well enough to walk so doesn't go. Dropping £xx on a taxi to drive out to a rural location for a 1 mile fare is worth every penny in the grand scheme.
ant leigh said:
tapereel said:
If it is an assessment it might come to the conclusion that he can't drive.
It should but my concern is he occasionally gets disorientated and it worries me that my dad won't say anything as he won't even remember he gets disorientated.The pdf link in the previous post was really good. Points out that memory is not the only issue, other aspects of driving skill are lost with dementia.
Convinces me he should in no way be driving and I will tell my mum that
Look after them both.
I went through this with my dad a few years ago, he was adamant that he was fine to drive but on one occasion he couldn't start the car, when I went to investigate he'd left his auto in D and turned the engine off and couldn't understand what the problem was. After that we decided to write to the DVLA who in turn contacted his Dr who advised that his licence should be removed but by this time I'd already told him that his licence was invalid. The next problem was his car was parked on the drive and he kept pestering me to help him get it working, but by this time he couldn't even unlock it so I told him it wasn't working and would need to get it fixed. Upon having a discussion with my (non driving) mum we decided to remove the car to my house and sell it.
Not sure where your father is on his dementia journey but just watch out for one thing; when my mother's dementia began to take hold, we could speak to her on a good day and, as a retired GP, she would readily concede that - unfortunate as it was - she absolutely shouldn't drive. On a bad day, she would forget that the conversation had ever happened, much less that she had surrendered her licence, and try to drive. For quite a period my father had to hide the car keys and keep the garages locked
knight said:
I went through this with my dad a few years ago, he was adamant that he was fine to drive but on one occasion he couldn't start the car, when I went to investigate he'd left his auto in D and turned the engine off and couldn't understand what the problem was. After that we decided to write to the DVLA who in turn contacted his Dr who advised that his licence should be removed but by this time I'd already told him that his licence was invalid. The next problem was his car was parked on the drive and he kept pestering me to help him get it working, but by this time he couldn't even unlock it so I told him it wasn't working and would need to get it fixed. Upon having a discussion with my (non driving) mum we decided to remove the car to my house and sell it.
This is much the same as I had with my Dad (not being able to start the car) but my (non driving) Mum still thought he was ok at driving.I gently pointed out to her that if he can forget how start his car he could also forget what red means at a set of traffic lights, or simply forget to brake at a zebra crossing.
She saw sense. We 'lost' his keys, set up an account with a taxi company and told him that at his age they were free - and then sold the car.
My father has dementia, and is now in full time care. He was fiercely protective about his driving licence and it caused some conflict within the family.
In the early stages he lost his car a few times, he would appear in a cab, as he'd parked it somewhere and forgotten where he'd left it. This would mean me driving round the local town he'd been to, trying to find it. It took a day of driving round back streets on one occasion only to eventually find it parked behind a doctors surgery in a marked bay with a ticket on it.
We finally put our foot down and stopped him driving when he had a minor shunt on a country lane. He came home with the drivers side wing smashed in and a broken headlight. All he knew was that it involved another car, but couldn't remember who it was, what the other car was or a registration number.
Good luck OP. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, and that's very hard.
In the early stages he lost his car a few times, he would appear in a cab, as he'd parked it somewhere and forgotten where he'd left it. This would mean me driving round the local town he'd been to, trying to find it. It took a day of driving round back streets on one occasion only to eventually find it parked behind a doctors surgery in a marked bay with a ticket on it.
We finally put our foot down and stopped him driving when he had a minor shunt on a country lane. He came home with the drivers side wing smashed in and a broken headlight. All he knew was that it involved another car, but couldn't remember who it was, what the other car was or a registration number.
Good luck OP. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, and that's very hard.
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