Pitfalls of Writing a Will?
Discussion
As per the title. We have someone coming out to discuss our needs for writing a will. Between the wife and I we have assets such that we need to tread carefully and ensure we do it all properly.
We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
Andehh said:
As per the title. We have someone coming out to discuss our needs for writing a will. Between the wife and I we have assets such that we need to tread carefully and ensure we do it all properly.
We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
Been thinking about this myself. I have no children, parents are dead and only one nephew that I havent seen or spoken to since 1970. If I die second to my wife I can imagine sharks like the Heir Hunters will come along and split up my estate between many cousins who I have never seen.We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
If I was to write a will then I have no idea who will be in it anyway, down to charities I suppose. Friend of mine collected victorian pen and ink drawings, he had hundreds. When he died his three children orgnanised a skip and put almost everything from the house into it, including the drawings, it would have broken his heart. I asked one of them about it and they said that all his furniture was dark wood and it wouldnt fit in with their hard wood floors and they all lived in small London flats.
Know what bugs me the most, who gets my tools, I have plastic storage boxes full of spanners and all sorts of stuff, some of which is over 80s years old, I keep hoping I will get another race bike and work on it but I dream on.
1. You need to think about who will be your executor(s). This is one of the most important decisions to make, especially if your situation requires a discretionary trust Will with a Letter of Wishes.
2. You need to think about who you would wish to raise your under 18's (if any) if you both go at the same time.
3. If you are like many these days with no children and no one who you really want to give your estate to you are best to make a will anyway if only to ensure that your money goes where you would like it to. One poster mentioned only having a relative that the last were in contact with 40 years ago. Perhaps that poster has a Charity that they hold close who might like their donation.
One idea i have had is to set up a scholarship for my old school. Other ideas are available.
IAALBNYL
2. You need to think about who you would wish to raise your under 18's (if any) if you both go at the same time.
3. If you are like many these days with no children and no one who you really want to give your estate to you are best to make a will anyway if only to ensure that your money goes where you would like it to. One poster mentioned only having a relative that the last were in contact with 40 years ago. Perhaps that poster has a Charity that they hold close who might like their donation.
One idea i have had is to set up a scholarship for my old school. Other ideas are available.
IAALBNYL
Andehh said:
As per the title. We have someone coming out to discuss our needs for writing a will. Between the wife and I we have assets such that we need to tread carefully and ensure we do it all properly.
We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
The big issue for you is that without a will, your wife inherits everything, and your daughter from a previous relationship potentially nothing.We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
So if you want your daughter to inherit something should you die before your wife, you need to explicitly say.
At the moment no doubt you and your wife have a great relationship and she would respect your wishes. But that could change before you die, and would you be able to get your will re-written to reflect this change in circumstances....
Always a minefield when there's previous relationships and children from them.
Borroxs said:
Always a minefield when there's previous relationships and children from them.
Yes, a colleague of mine was left his Father's share of the property he lived in with his second wife. He forced the sale of the property and left her homeless. Seemed quite proud of it as well. Borroxs said:
The big issue for you is that without a will, your wife inherits everything, and your daughter from a previous relationship potentially nothing.
So if you want your daughter to inherit something should you die before your wife, you need to explicitly say.
At the moment no doubt you and your wife have a great relationship and she would respect your wishes. But that could change before you die, and would you be able to get your will re-written to reflect this change in circumstances....
Always a minefield when there's previous relationships and children from them.
Sadly that seems to happen all too much - new spouse and kids from the second relationship getting everything So if you want your daughter to inherit something should you die before your wife, you need to explicitly say.
At the moment no doubt you and your wife have a great relationship and she would respect your wishes. But that could change before you die, and would you be able to get your will re-written to reflect this change in circumstances....
Always a minefield when there's previous relationships and children from them.
My dad was the executor of his friend's will and this happened. He said he couldn't look the two sons in the eye after it
Motorrad said:
Borroxs said:
Always a minefield when there's previous relationships and children from them.
Yes, a colleague of mine was left his Father's share of the property he lived in with his second wife. He forced the sale of the property and left her homeless. Seemed quite proud of it as well. im struggling to get teary eyed over this one.
Sad but needs to be done, my partners mother and step-dad recently did theirs.
They have been quite clear in leaving everything to my partner (cutting out his estranged daughter) and ensured there are caveats that if one dies before the other the home remains available to the other one until time "x" (their death).
Not sure how it works and what not, but be careful in the choice of executor too, my Grandmother left her eldest sons in charge, one who is a complete t**t and enjoyed the power trip over everyone else (powerfully built, goateed, new wife type) and the other who is a pushover, he delayed everything and just made things awkward at a difficult enough time for the other siblings.
My other grandparent, has split everything 25% per child with clear redistribution rules if any of her children pass before her, divided between the other siblings with minimal rerouted to spouses / grand-children.
I am in my 20's and will set mine up when I return to the UK, along with life insurance
ETA; no executions.
They have been quite clear in leaving everything to my partner (cutting out his estranged daughter) and ensured there are caveats that if one dies before the other the home remains available to the other one until time "x" (their death).
Not sure how it works and what not, but be careful in the choice of executor too, my Grandmother left her eldest sons in charge, one who is a complete t**t and enjoyed the power trip over everyone else (powerfully built, goateed, new wife type) and the other who is a pushover, he delayed everything and just made things awkward at a difficult enough time for the other siblings.
My other grandparent, has split everything 25% per child with clear redistribution rules if any of her children pass before her, divided between the other siblings with minimal rerouted to spouses / grand-children.
I am in my 20's and will set mine up when I return to the UK, along with life insurance
ETA; no executions.
Edited by Trexthedinosaur on Wednesday 11th January 19:50
Andehh said:
As per the title. We have someone coming out to discuss our needs for writing a will. Between the wife and I we have assets such that we need to tread carefully and ensure we do it all properly.
We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
To get the most out of a session like this is is paramount that you and your wife have thought about, and discussed what your objectives are. We have a son and I have a daughter from a previous relationship. More children will be on the horizon within the next 18 months, so that will be something I query on making amendments in future.
He has suggested 60 - 90mins to discuss it with us, before informing us of how much it will be & proceeding from there if we do go ahead with it.
Anyone offer any advice? or is it really that simple?
Sounds simple but it isn't always. Chats like this can sometimes open up areas where one partner wants to make provision X whereas the other thinks Y is adequate (or X is inadequate). So try to get broadly on the same page beforehand.
Then it's a case of mapping out roughly where you want your joint assets to end up when one of your dies, and when the second of you dies. The lawyer's job is (a) to tell you how best to achieve what you want to do; (b) (if you ask him to) to do so in a tax-efficient manner; (c) to ensure that the wills he drafts actually do what you want to achieve. And possibly, (d) to suggest angles or ideas that you might not have considered but which he thinks you might want to consider based on what you tell him.
In short, there's a spectrum from simply translating your undiluted statements into an effective will to full blown estate planning peppered with whizzo ideas from the lawyer. Where you want to pitch yourselves on the scale is up to you both.
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