Anyone else Middle aged and renting solo

[croyde]

I suppose plenty of divorced Dads.

I moved out of the family home about 4 years ago and rented a flat nearby. SW London, one bedroom, £1200 a month.

I could manage it as work was busy (freelance) and remained so, thus I was able to swallow the extra expenses on top of child maintenance. Being on my own also allowed me to say yes to more work so it all worked out.

Feeling that being just round the corner was not working as far as demands on my time from my ex wife, depression and advice of a counseller to make decisions that benefited me for a change, I moved further out to the country, to a lovely detached cottage that cost £1375 a month.

Just a bit more and along with a massive increase in council tax as well as petrol and train costs, I still swallowed it all up. Really love being out of London for the first time in my 54 years.

Met one girl, but she lived in LA so didn't last but since then have met a fantastic woman who lives about 20 miles away. So 30 minute drive on deserted country back roads.

But since Christmas business has died and even though I make an ok amount on only 6 or 7 days a month ie better than a lot of full time wages, it just doesn't cut the mustard what with rent, expenses and maintenance.

I've almost used up my 6 month emergency money.

So begs the question: How the hell do people manage? If this goes on much longer, I'll be forced to find a room in a house share, Nooooo.

Not quite how I saw myself in middle age.

Not looking for answers, just wondered what others do in a similar situation. Suppose I could move in with my girlfriend but I don't think we are both there yet. She's been on her own a while and so have I so we both love spending time together and apart.

Also I do have my kids stay with me from time to time so that'll stop if I move into a flatshare

Meanwhile my 14 month old car is up for sale. I'm using my Vespa to save money on fuel and I've cancelled my NowTV, Spotify, Netflix etc.

[PH XKR]

benefits are how most manage, and if work dries up you look for a stop gap stacking shelves etc if it brings cash in

[DuraAce]

Move up north. Much cheaper!

[PH XKR]

DuraAce said:

Move up north. Much cheaper!

Depends on which part of the north, its all rather depressing up there.

[Hoofy]

I read that as you working 6-7 days a month? Get another job, consider anything reasonable (ie not flipping burgers if you're earning in 6-7 days what most earn in a month).

[jonah35]

I prefer the north. You can buy a nice flat or house for £100k in a nice area. The mortgage would be pennies. You can walk round the corner to delis, bars, restaurants and can actually use a car.

I live where i grew up so fortunately know all the people around from primary school, high school, college, uni, gym, football etc and i personally find it nice. Prob 8 of us are going out shortly, all mid/early 30s and all known each other for 25years plus. What about moving back to your home town?

Youll soon be able to access your pension for the deposit for a house
too.

Nights out in liverpool, newcastle, manchester etc are all great fun.

London is great and i work there often so stay in various places but it does seem its all about the 'career' and a lot of people have forgotten that life is to have fun, a laugh and good friends.

[alorotom]

PH XKR said:

DuraAce said:

Move up north. Much cheaper!

Depends on which part of the north, its all rather depressing up there.

Indeed very depressing and you wouldn't want to move north


@DuraAce - stop recommending people move North, our cushy cheap living in rural bliss won't last much longer with such craziness!

[PurpleMoonlight]

What's classed as middle aged these days?

Anyway, I'm 55 and rent. I like the idea of not having to worry about property maintenance and that if desired I can up sticks and move without having to sell.

The downside is that I will have to fund rent until I die so greater pension and savings needed.

I'm currently in Leicestershire but would love to move to Brighton. Maybe one day ...

[PH XKR]

alorotom said:

PH XKR said:

DuraAce said:

Move up north. Much cheaper!

Depends on which part of the north, its all rather depressing up there.

Indeed very depressing and you wouldn't want to move north


DuraAce - stop recommending people move North, our cushy cheap living in rural bliss won't last much longer with such craziness!

Cheap rural bliss?! I left it all 20 odd years back, I never imagined a life away now I cant find a way back. Back when I left the gap between London and the North wasn't much, now it is a huge void. It is disgusting how the wealth is not redistributed to give the infrastructure the boost needed up there. I love the north, now I am self employed I could relocate back but where I am from in the high peak/penines, its a little bit depressing to see once blossoming towns becoming ghosts of their former selves (Glossop area)

[stuart-b]

You aren't working enough and your expenses are too high.

Sorry to state the obvious. Have you considered finding a sales partner to get you the work, to fill up your time? Even if you have to pay them 30-50% of the value of your project, at least you are working.

A lot of freelancers can't work and acquire new business - my friend is one of them, always broke.

[wibble cb]

Reducing expenses is a good start, don't spend what you don't have, I have a relative that constantly does this, then come looking for 'help' ( not saying you are though!) I guess the idea of sharing accommodation is not all that appealing? Other than that, increase the funds coming in, years ago my father had to work on building sites cash in hand just to make ends meet( he was a car salesman by trade), are there other jobs you can do that would provide income when your main job is quiet?

[Super Slo Mo]

stuart-b said:

You aren't working enough and your expenses are too high.

Sorry to state the obvious. Have you considered finding a sales partner to get you the work, to fill up your time? Even if you have to pay them 30-50% of the value of your project, at least you are working.

A lot of freelancers can't work and acquire new business - my friend is one of them, always broke.

He's in television, a sales partner wouldn't really work.
Croyde, have you tried approaching the usual suspects? Doing live sport etc? I'm current doing 12-18 days a month with little sign of it letting up although May and June are not that busy yet.
Means a lot of travelling that's the only thing.

The suggestion of moving further north isn't a bad one, it's still easy to get into London and most of the other venues are much closer too.

Give me a shout if you want contacts at the facilities companies but I dare say you already know where to go?

[SAS Tom]

Move north. £1350 a month on rent is bonkers!

[alorotom]

PH XKR said:

Cheap rural bliss?! I left it all 20 odd years back, I never imagined a life away now I cant find a way back. Back when I left the gap between London and the North wasn't much, now it is a huge void. It is disgusting how the wealth is not redistributed to give the infrastructure the boost needed up there. I love the north, now I am self employed I could relocate back but where I am from in the high peak/penines, its a little bit depressing to see once blossoming towns becoming ghosts of their former selves (Glossop area)

It's a really interesting one actually, some places are definitely losing out and in rapid decline, i think where some towns and villages have embraced being unique and work to draw in people its a different matter altogether, thinking Morpeth, Alnwick, Amble.... all were in decline a few years ago and now back on the road to thriving, but these are granted not the super cheap Northern locations many think of (or see on C4 etc...)

But even in bigger cities like Newcastle and Sunderland £1350 goes a whole long way, we used to have a letting business and all the stock we owned was let between £500 and £650pcm and was mostly decent 3bd semi's, decent gardens, drives, garages, nice area, low crime, good schools ... £1350 is just depressing to me

Edited by alorotom on Friday 21st April 20:35

[Celtic Dragon]

If you don't mind an hours commute to kings cross, then look st Sandy and Potton. My rent for a 1 bed flat is £425, and council tax is £90

[battered]

alorotom said:

PH XKR said:

DuraAce said:

Move up north. Much cheaper!

Depends on which part of the north, its all rather depressing up there.

Indeed very depressing and you wouldn't want to move north


@DuraAce - stop recommending people move North, our cushy cheap living in rural bliss won't last much longer with such craziness!

Absolutely. Don't come to the North, it's terrible. Everywhere here is like Barnsley or Grimsby, or worse. We had to live in a box in t' road fo' 20 year till we'd sa ved up enough t'ev a second box fo't' bairns. It's not stopped raining since 1983 and tM1's cobbled after Watford Gap services. There's so little work that I've been forced to become an economic migrant and spend 5 months in the rural idyll of Edith, Kent. Eeh, y'should see it these. T'ouses EV rooted and everything.

[Tam_Mullen]

That is mental for rent!

This CASTLE, is for rent near by me... for just £150 more than you pay

https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/rent-castle-...

[romeogolf]

Your rent is mad. A nice 1-bed in Bournemouth is half that for a start.

[steveatesh]

battered said:

alorotom said:

PH XKR said:

DuraAce said:

Move up north. Much cheaper!

Depends on which part of the north, its all rather depressing up there.

Indeed very depressing and you wouldn't want to move north


@DuraAce - stop recommending people move North, our cushy cheap living in rural bliss won't last much longer with such craziness!

Absolutely. Don't come to the North, it's terrible. Everywhere here is like Barnsley or Grimsby, or worse. We had to live in a box in t' road fo' 20 year till we'd sa ved up enough t'ev a second box fo't' bairns. It's not stopped raining since 1983 and tM1's cobbled after Watford Gap services. There's so little work that I've been forced to become an economic migrant and spend 5 months in the rural idyll of Edith, Kent. Eeh, y'should see it these. T'ouses EV rooted and everything.

Agreed, the north is terrible. New four bed detached houses going here for a little over 200k, or rent a three bed semi for around £650, the commute is a terrible 15 minutes (or it was when I worked for somebody else anyway), unspoiled beaches, open countryside and driving roads and you don't wear your overcoat in winter. Stay away!

[PH XKR]

Just noticed you are flogging your car and keeping the Vespa.

From your post, whether you think it or not, money or things of a value do hold something for you. Otherwise why say how much you are spending or the fact the scooter is a vespa.

Flogging a 14 month old car will cost you dear. Flog the vespa. Change where you live for somewhere cheaper or Air BnB a spare room. Get down to B^Q, anywhere and look for work if your business is failing. No one should have an excuse to end up penniless if they can swallow pride and make some changes.