Funny things your parents said to you.....

[Wacky Racer]

As per thread title.

My mum once said "The trouble with you Wacky is your driving's too erotic".......

[spaximus]

Not a parent but an Aunt, she was asking if I believed that Dianna was killed as she did it was the Bleeding MFI that did it, she said
must have flat packed her.

[droopsnoot]

Any time I mention I'm going to see a band that I always go and see when they're touring, I hear "Oh, are they still going?". Well, yes.

[JoPo1]

My aunt was looking for the button to adjust the seat in my car. Told her to press the button on the door and she said 'This better not be one of they erection seats'.

Ejection seats.

[Alpacaman]

My Mum once told someone the funeral we were going to was sectarian instead of secular.

[selnic]

The mother in law always said that she wanted to have a go in a stimulator for her 60th birthday!

[43034]

JoPo1 said:

My aunt was looking for the button to adjust the seat in my car. Told her to press the button on the door and she said 'This better not be one of they erection seats'.

Ejection seats.

Sounds like a plot for a James Bond porno.

[Nobby Diesel]

My mum proclaimed that some devout christian people we know were "God gobblers".
I shudder to think.

[carrottop]

I suffered with acne in my teens and my aunt suggested I try that new cleararsol she'd seen on the tele. She even enquired after it at the local chemist

[dazwalsh]

"Son, you were adopted"

Mum is always telling jokes the crazy woman

[davhill]

My auntie Nancy moved to Oz in the 60s. On a nostalgic return trip she amused me with something I hadn't heard before.

in the car, she referred to the folding grip above the side window as "the Jesus handle".

Very apt.

[Wobbegong]

“Make the most of it. School days are the best of your life”

Thankfully I didn’t believe them and avoided suicide

[Monkeylegend]

I picked up an old guy in my car a few years ago. As he got in the front seat he laid his walking stick down beside the seat, resting it on the electric recline button. He disappeared from my line of sight as he gracefully laid back in the seat as it fully reclined and he ended up horizontal with his head resting on the back seat cushion.

He didn't utter a word over the few seconds it took to recline completely.

Sorry about the slight thread drift but actions speak louder than words as they say.

[glenrobbo]

My mum was talking to some American tourists, and they happened to ask her if she had lived in the village all her life?

"Not yet" she replied brightly.

[glenrobbo]

selnic said:

The mother in law always said that she wanted to have a go in a stimulator for her 60th birthday!

Reminds me of when Barbarella was sentenced to "death by pleasure" in the Orgasmatron at the hands of the evil Dr. Duran Duran:


She was too much for the machine, it suffered an overload and was ruined.

Shame, your MIL would probably have loved a go...

[xjay1337]

"You're a disappointment to me as a son".

[SeeFive]

I remember my dad saying to me that the Beatles would never be short of work as Paul McCartney was a left handed guitarist, and they could play smaller stages than bands with all right handlers...

There was some logic there, but ever so slightly flawed as it turned out.

[Noodle1982]

When ever my mother gets in the car with me and i start moving before shes clicked in her belt (it takes her forever) she always says..

...'don't go yet, i haven't done my strap on'

[cuprabob]

xjay1337 said:

"You're a disappointment to me as a son".

Did you fare any better as a daughter?

[davhill]

My Mum was in her 70s when I bought an XR3i.

She always called it the X31. I felt it should've had the prefix 'Fireball'