Dating Dilema!
Discussion
Been online dating for about 2 years, many no strings encounters and no real dramas to date, it's fairly easy going.
Been seeing a girl 10 years my junior (early twenties) for about a month. she seems quite keen, or bored, one of the two.
Last weekend she invites me to a work gathering of hers, where I get the feeling she is not particularly well liked. During the evening it leaks out she had an affair with a married doctor, she had kind of mentioned something about it before but it was a cringe moment and almost a thought of wtf am I doing here from myself.
There's been a few other alarm bells with her, my female mates tell me to give her a chance but something inside of me makes me feel like she is a wrong'un and a home wrecker, and at that age she will only get worse.
What do we think about this modern dating tale?
Cheers
Been seeing a girl 10 years my junior (early twenties) for about a month. she seems quite keen, or bored, one of the two.
Last weekend she invites me to a work gathering of hers, where I get the feeling she is not particularly well liked. During the evening it leaks out she had an affair with a married doctor, she had kind of mentioned something about it before but it was a cringe moment and almost a thought of wtf am I doing here from myself.
There's been a few other alarm bells with her, my female mates tell me to give her a chance but something inside of me makes me feel like she is a wrong'un and a home wrecker, and at that age she will only get worse.
What do we think about this modern dating tale?
Cheers
i wouldn't necessarily let the affair thing, or other peoples judgements of her put you off.
Make your own assessments, some people probably really don't like me, but my gf didn't base her opinion of me on what anyone else thinks, and neither did i of her.
As for the affair thing, that can be pretty relative and contextual...ask her about the circumstances, try to see it from all angles. Just because she fooled around with a married guy doesn't mean she will mess you around, necessarily.
my soon to be fiance had an affair with a married guy for a good few years, i know the entire story inside and out, and it doesn't bother me in the slightest tbh...but then we are both very secure in our relationship.
The only thing that would ring alarm bells with me would be the age gap, girls in their early 20s can be very flighty, and usually haven't decided what they actual want from life, yet alone a partner.
Make your own assessments, some people probably really don't like me, but my gf didn't base her opinion of me on what anyone else thinks, and neither did i of her.
As for the affair thing, that can be pretty relative and contextual...ask her about the circumstances, try to see it from all angles. Just because she fooled around with a married guy doesn't mean she will mess you around, necessarily.
my soon to be fiance had an affair with a married guy for a good few years, i know the entire story inside and out, and it doesn't bother me in the slightest tbh...but then we are both very secure in our relationship.
The only thing that would ring alarm bells with me would be the age gap, girls in their early 20s can be very flighty, and usually haven't decided what they actual want from life, yet alone a partner.
AuthurDaley said:
During the evening it leaks out she had an affair with a married doctor, she had kind of mentioned something about it before but it was a cringe moment and almost a thought of wtf am I doing here from myself.
Was she single when she had the affair? Maintaining the sanctity of someone else's marriage isn't everyone else's responsibility and it takes two to tango.How bad are the other warning bells? Also how much are you willing to invest (potentially lose) in this relationship?
I love these threads, they always make me smile!
OP, with the greatest of respect, do you really hope to get a sensible answer from a motoring based forum?
Anyway, on with the humorous replies........
Has anyone mentioned the OXO tower yet?
On a sensible note though, if your'e getting negative vibes maybe it's time to move on.....
OP, with the greatest of respect, do you really hope to get a sensible answer from a motoring based forum?
Anyway, on with the humorous replies........
Has anyone mentioned the OXO tower yet?
On a sensible note though, if your'e getting negative vibes maybe it's time to move on.....
What's the dilemma here exactly?
Worried what others say about her?
Do you like her? Maybe just see how it goes and take it slowly if you're unsure.
How much about her past has she divulged to you? I recently had a relationship go sour leaving me very hurt.. it was only afterwards I found out her behaviour was typical and repeated over a number of previous relationships. But while we were together I found no need to ask about her past. Lesson learnt.
Worried what others say about her?
Do you like her? Maybe just see how it goes and take it slowly if you're unsure.
How much about her past has she divulged to you? I recently had a relationship go sour leaving me very hurt.. it was only afterwards I found out her behaviour was typical and repeated over a number of previous relationships. But while we were together I found no need to ask about her past. Lesson learnt.
I got more replies on this than any car related post!
I think I know what I need to do, after several online encounters not many leave me with a bad vibe like this one.
In terms of being fit it's probably a 6/10, more quirk and sex appeal than beauty I would say.
Will consider having a chat with her or winding down all communication. Am inclined to forget the civilised chat - of all my online encounters I find it pretty shocking and disshapointing that someone of this age would have no issue banging a married elder doctor.
I think I know what I need to do, after several online encounters not many leave me with a bad vibe like this one.
In terms of being fit it's probably a 6/10, more quirk and sex appeal than beauty I would say.
Will consider having a chat with her or winding down all communication. Am inclined to forget the civilised chat - of all my online encounters I find it pretty shocking and disshapointing that someone of this age would have no issue banging a married elder doctor.
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