The most stupid thing you've ever done on a bike!
Discussion
OK.....i'm sure we all have done something daft! I've had a couple of very amusing and embarassing instances!!!!
My all time favourite was riding through Southampton on a courtesy scooter as my bike got knocked over (i wasn't on it) and got written off. Anyhow....back to story.
I was filtering through the traffic and noticed the gap getting smaller and smaller until the inevitable happened......I managed to jam my knees between a white van and a car on my right. Needless to say I panic banging on both cars telling them not to move while I managed to push myself out of the jam. Both drivers looked high bemused and was I highly embarrassed.
The second instance for me was riding around Somerset on my bike. Went for a corner a little too quick not realising how tight it was.....before I knew it, the brakes were on full (but bikes don't steer too good with brakes on full).
I ended up coasting into a ditch and having to ride through the bloody thing until I managed to get out. Lucky there was no damaged to my bike but plenty to my ego!
My all time favourite was riding through Southampton on a courtesy scooter as my bike got knocked over (i wasn't on it) and got written off. Anyhow....back to story.
I was filtering through the traffic and noticed the gap getting smaller and smaller until the inevitable happened......I managed to jam my knees between a white van and a car on my right. Needless to say I panic banging on both cars telling them not to move while I managed to push myself out of the jam. Both drivers looked high bemused and was I highly embarrassed.
The second instance for me was riding around Somerset on my bike. Went for a corner a little too quick not realising how tight it was.....before I knew it, the brakes were on full (but bikes don't steer too good with brakes on full).
I ended up coasting into a ditch and having to ride through the bloody thing until I managed to get out. Lucky there was no damaged to my bike but plenty to my ego!
Two embarrasing incidents. Firstly I filled my CBR1000 up with Slick 50 one Sunday morn after battling large hangover 
Then resultant clutch slip cost me £350 for a new wetplate clutch from D&H motorcyles the following week - Cheers John
Boy did he piss himeslf when I told him 
Secondly, parked my gixer up outside a busy post office on saturday morning and just made it by 12 before it closed. Feeling damned cool and looking at a nice piece of ass I gave it large as I pulled away but ended up sitting on the floor with bike on top, revving like a bastard, and back wheel spinning its head off; yup you guessed it - disc lock
you only do that once. Cost me lots, though managed to prevent the plastic gettin scratched as I broke the fall. Thank god for tinted visor so they couldnt see the idiot on the inside 
Then resultant clutch slip cost me £350 for a new wetplate clutch from D&H motorcyles the following week - Cheers John
Boy did he piss himeslf when I told him Secondly, parked my gixer up outside a busy post office on saturday morning and just made it by 12 before it closed. Feeling damned cool and looking at a nice piece of ass I gave it large as I pulled away but ended up sitting on the floor with bike on top, revving like a bastard, and back wheel spinning its head off; yup you guessed it - disc lock
you only do that once. Cost me lots, though managed to prevent the plastic gettin scratched as I broke the fall. Thank god for tinted visor so they couldnt see the idiot on the inside 
One of the funniest things I've seen was outside the Mermaid pub in Wolverhampton a few years back. A motorbike pulled up at the lights, two on board, both young. Saw the crowd outside enjoying the sun and started revving up ready for the impressive pull away. Lights turned to green, out went the clutch, up went the front, off fell the lad on the back. He wasn't hurt but the place was in stitches.
Gave myself concussion by tripping over my own feet & forgetting to put my arms out to save my fall 5 mins before sailing home to the UK - the ferry doctor refused to let me sail & insisted I went to casualty... whilst my bike/luggage/mates/clothes/MAKE UP etc. all returned to blighty....
....Meanwhile I was discharged from french casualty after 2hrs... to return to the hotel we'd stayed in the night before & face a £400 bar bill (my travelling companions) lol
And yes, I did look a tw@t walking round in 1pce leathers & no bike.
....Meanwhile I was discharged from french casualty after 2hrs... to return to the hotel we'd stayed in the night before & face a £400 bar bill (my travelling companions) lol
And yes, I did look a tw@t walking round in 1pce leathers & no bike.
s2rr Kitty said:
Lots of funny stuff
Sorry, but that sounded really funny. Can you get Dave to recount his story of arriving home many years ago when he had the old red and silver CBR600? And so to my story. I was being a nob and riding at well into 3 figures on a B road when a car pulled out from a side turning way ahead of me and stopped halfway across the road. I began braking...hard, however I was riding the same GSXR600 that had been tested by Niall Mackenzie and TWO magazine a few weeks before and the brakes had become wooden and rubbish! I slowed down to 30 ish and decided I had to make a decision as to which side of the car I was going to go. I chose left...and then the car continued and closed the door.
I took to the grass verge and whipped along the side of the bush losing my knee slider in the process. I then clonked my elbow on his wingmirror and then amazingly I returned to the road still in tact and upright and in front of the car! ...and that was the silliest thing I've ever done on a bike.
I've learnt a lot since then...I've posted this before but here you go......
I was in a pub drinking (heavily (no suprise there)) and decided I ought to check that I could leave my bike in the car park
The landlord though I meant pushbike (why he thought I'd not want to wheel a pushbike home is beyond me but I digress)
He suggested I leave my bike in the pub for the night
In my drunken state I thought it would be a good idea to ride said motorcycle into the pub to the ammusment of all concerned.....
Didn't quite work out like that as I forgot...
a: Riding when you're pissed is bloody difficult
b: Sober people aren't actually amused by pissed people riding motcycles in pubs
c: There are steps up into the pub and when you're a short arse on a sports bike your feet don't touch the ground if the front wheel is a foot off the floor
At least I still thought it was funny, while lying under my bike partly in the lounge bar but mostly in the porch... wasn't quite as funny when I got the bil for the bike repairs and the carpet cleaning but I guess you live and learn
I was in a pub drinking (heavily (no suprise there)) and decided I ought to check that I could leave my bike in the car park
The landlord though I meant pushbike (why he thought I'd not want to wheel a pushbike home is beyond me but I digress)
He suggested I leave my bike in the pub for the night
In my drunken state I thought it would be a good idea to ride said motorcycle into the pub to the ammusment of all concerned.....
Didn't quite work out like that as I forgot...
a: Riding when you're pissed is bloody difficult
b: Sober people aren't actually amused by pissed people riding motcycles in pubs
c: There are steps up into the pub and when you're a short arse on a sports bike your feet don't touch the ground if the front wheel is a foot off the floor
At least I still thought it was funny, while lying under my bike partly in the lounge bar but mostly in the porch... wasn't quite as funny when I got the bil for the bike repairs and the carpet cleaning but I guess you live and learn
About 5 years ago, 2 months after passing my test, I went round a friend’s flat, on my CBR400. Anyway while talking to my mate in the court yard outside, (Which was surrounded by 10 foot high brick walls on three sides) my little brother turned up on his 50cc scooter which was only about a year old.
I thought it would be a great idea to have a go on the moped, so I got on it went racing across the court yard and proceeded to pull an impressive wheelie,...... unfortunately I was so pre-occupied with trying to impress my mate and my brother, that I didn’t leave enough room to stop, and managed to go straight into the brick wall at about 15-20mph.
The front end was a complete mess, and i was lucky not to be hurt (was in t-shirt jeans and no helmet), that ended up costing me about £600 in parts and a week to put it back together.
Luckily everyone saw the funny side and there were no injuries (apart from my pride).
>> Edited by v8nrg on Monday 18th April 13:17
I thought it would be a great idea to have a go on the moped, so I got on it went racing across the court yard and proceeded to pull an impressive wheelie,...... unfortunately I was so pre-occupied with trying to impress my mate and my brother, that I didn’t leave enough room to stop, and managed to go straight into the brick wall at about 15-20mph.
The front end was a complete mess, and i was lucky not to be hurt (was in t-shirt jeans and no helmet), that ended up costing me about £600 in parts and a week to put it back together.
Luckily everyone saw the funny side and there were no injuries (apart from my pride).
>> Edited by v8nrg on Monday 18th April 13:17
All right I'll list a few of them.
1. Got banned by "Le Shuttle" for pulling wheelies down the inside of the train, two of us side by side down most of the length of the train.
2. Got banned by P&O ferries for doing a burn out on the car deck as we were coming into port and setting all the smoke detectors off.
3. Crashed into the back of a stationary car and put my front wheel through the rear wind screen, broke my ribs and cut my leg open, strangely enough I was pulling wheelies and lost it.
4. Stuffed a ZX7R under the back of a Megane and managed to lift the rear of the car up, I "got off" seconds before impact and dived through a hedge with no injuries, I wasn't actually wheelieing that time but I was racing a mate.
5. Shreaded a rear tyre and a tent when I was doing a burn out inside someones tent who had gone to bed early one year at LM, the bike actually grabbed the ground sheet and pulled mate still in sleeping bag into the rear wheel (luckily not hurt and he did see the funny side)
6. Hit a marshell at Oulton Park when racing, he stepped out to stop me at the start of the pit lane and the throttle was sticking (thats why I was coming in) stop go penalty from clerk of the course.
7. Clipped mirrors with a mate down the Mousanne Straight well over the tonne on the way for a Mc Dump we were both still pissed from the night before.
8. Binned a Fireblade 2 up trying to swerve for a cat.
9. Put the only toilet block on the camp site out of action at Magne Cours by doing doe nuts on the tiled floor on an R1.
10. Destroyed a rat bike again at LM by doing burn outs in the middle of a very large camp fire.
11. Rode 10 miles home sitting on the bar with legs over the front, because I had a puncture on the back wheel.
12. "Failed to stop" numerous times either in france or the UK for speeding, and once when road testing a race bike.
Plus lots more after 20 years of riding bikes, honestly I'm slowing down alot now days and have learnt my lessons on the wheelies, I am now a model citizen honestly.
1. Got banned by "Le Shuttle" for pulling wheelies down the inside of the train, two of us side by side down most of the length of the train.
2. Got banned by P&O ferries for doing a burn out on the car deck as we were coming into port and setting all the smoke detectors off.
3. Crashed into the back of a stationary car and put my front wheel through the rear wind screen, broke my ribs and cut my leg open, strangely enough I was pulling wheelies and lost it.
4. Stuffed a ZX7R under the back of a Megane and managed to lift the rear of the car up, I "got off" seconds before impact and dived through a hedge with no injuries, I wasn't actually wheelieing that time but I was racing a mate.
5. Shreaded a rear tyre and a tent when I was doing a burn out inside someones tent who had gone to bed early one year at LM, the bike actually grabbed the ground sheet and pulled mate still in sleeping bag into the rear wheel (luckily not hurt and he did see the funny side)
6. Hit a marshell at Oulton Park when racing, he stepped out to stop me at the start of the pit lane and the throttle was sticking (thats why I was coming in) stop go penalty from clerk of the course.
7. Clipped mirrors with a mate down the Mousanne Straight well over the tonne on the way for a Mc Dump we were both still pissed from the night before.
8. Binned a Fireblade 2 up trying to swerve for a cat.
9. Put the only toilet block on the camp site out of action at Magne Cours by doing doe nuts on the tiled floor on an R1.
10. Destroyed a rat bike again at LM by doing burn outs in the middle of a very large camp fire.
11. Rode 10 miles home sitting on the bar with legs over the front, because I had a puncture on the back wheel.
12. "Failed to stop" numerous times either in france or the UK for speeding, and once when road testing a race bike.
Plus lots more after 20 years of riding bikes, honestly I'm slowing down alot now days and have learnt my lessons on the wheelies, I am now a model citizen honestly.
legend Gassing Station | Biker Banter | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff