PSA: Sugar Free Polo's.
Discussion
I've mentioned before that I have a phobia of pooing anywhere other than my own toilet (and the upstairs one only). I can count on my fingers how many times I've pooed at somewhere that isn't that toilet in the last 15 years.
One of these times was around ten years ago whilst I was at work stacking milk/fresh pizzas. On my way in I picked up a packet of sugar free polos because they didn't have the ones I wanted.
I got through them very quickly. My farts were horrible (well for others). Farting around the supermarket and waiting for someone to notice it was fun. I then had a fart and knew it was a bad one...
I had a problem. Do I run to the toilet and risk relaxing my bum hole too much and s
t myself on the shop floor, or do I take it slow and risk taking too long and stting myself on the shop floor...
Annoying the toilets are upstairs...42 of them.
There are four in the gents. I find one that doesn't look the worst and has bog roll. I get my antibac handwash out and squirt it on the bog seat before wiping it off and placing bog roll on top. I know its weird, don't need to tell me.
I drop my trousers and before I've even managed to sit down my bum hole has given up holding it in and just lets it all out. It was like water. It was vile. It stank. I was gagging. Someone else walked in and from the sound they made they didn't enjoy it (that still makes me laugh).
It was never ending. 45 minutes later I figured I would be safe. Strangely hardly any wiping needed. I'm still confused.
Wonder downstairs back to the shop floor expecting a bking from my manager for not doing my job for the last 45 minutes, but he didn't mention anything...result.
I didn't trust a fart. I had a couple of returns to the toilet which turned out to be a fart.
Since then I've never had a sugar free polo. I can eat the normal ones like there is no tomorrow though.
One of these times was around ten years ago whilst I was at work stacking milk/fresh pizzas. On my way in I picked up a packet of sugar free polos because they didn't have the ones I wanted.
I got through them very quickly. My farts were horrible (well for others). Farting around the supermarket and waiting for someone to notice it was fun. I then had a fart and knew it was a bad one...
I had a problem. Do I run to the toilet and risk relaxing my bum hole too much and s
t myself on the shop floor, or do I take it slow and risk taking too long and stting myself on the shop floor...Annoying the toilets are upstairs...42 of them.
There are four in the gents. I find one that doesn't look the worst and has bog roll. I get my antibac handwash out and squirt it on the bog seat before wiping it off and placing bog roll on top. I know its weird, don't need to tell me.
I drop my trousers and before I've even managed to sit down my bum hole has given up holding it in and just lets it all out. It was like water. It was vile. It stank. I was gagging. Someone else walked in and from the sound they made they didn't enjoy it (that still makes me laugh).
It was never ending. 45 minutes later I figured I would be safe. Strangely hardly any wiping needed. I'm still confused.
Wonder downstairs back to the shop floor expecting a b
king from my manager for not doing my job for the last 45 minutes, but he didn't mention anything...result. I didn't trust a fart. I had a couple of returns to the toilet which turned out to be a fart.
Since then I've never had a sugar free polo. I can eat the normal ones like there is no tomorrow though.
eezeh said:
Public Service Announcement:
As it turns out the sugar free variety contain Sorbitol, an artificial sweetener, and a laxative.
As you say OP Sorbitol is your problem.As it turns out the sugar free variety contain Sorbitol, an artificial sweetener, and a laxative.
It's used as an alternative to Sugar and is in alot of 'Sugar Free' sweets, many have been listed above.
In a nutshell it draws water in to your intestines causing bowel movements as you expeeienced.
Reminds me of my early childhood in the 80's. I was diagnosed type 1 diabetic. Easter came around and I was bought 'delicious diabetic' Easter eggs. I ate one whole egg on Easter Sunday and then did not get off the toilet for about 24 hours. Lesson learned and I have never touched 'diabetic chocolate' since.
I just avoid sugar and sugar free stuff.
Mike
I just avoid sugar and sugar free stuff.
Mike
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