OP, once it comes to the point that you're actually contemplating this. Then surely that would be the point where you cut your losses and go all Bannatyne
If you don't get any responses there is plenty of stuff floating about in places like Roosh V about how to market yourself for whatever you want out of it.
Usually on return from sortie over Berlin when three of the four engines are gone, CoPilot has bought it and I copped some bally Jerry shrapnel in my legs.
king than sex. 
