Whats wrong with me
Discussion
I have job security, a mortgage and a perfect partner, nothing really missing in my life.
Yet despite this even though i love my partner, when i find out that someone is interested in me and is available, my head becomes battered, i dont just take it as a compliment and move on i actually start thinking what life would be like by dating this new person even if i dont know much about them, (obviously providing i think they are attractive physically).
Aswell as this im finding 75% of women attractive at the moment, like my standards have just gone down so much.
Have you been through a similar phase before? Is it natural or a bad sign?
Yet despite this even though i love my partner, when i find out that someone is interested in me and is available, my head becomes battered, i dont just take it as a compliment and move on i actually start thinking what life would be like by dating this new person even if i dont know much about them, (obviously providing i think they are attractive physically).
Aswell as this im finding 75% of women attractive at the moment, like my standards have just gone down so much.
Have you been through a similar phase before? Is it natural or a bad sign?
You haven't mentioned how long you've been together. Could it be the 7 year itch by any chance? My two penneth. That fit blond behind the counter who smiles at you in THAT way, go home and knock one out, instead of acting on the urge. You'll experience a whole world less of pain that way.
Old man wisdom time.
When I was younger I was onto anything that moved. I learnt the hard way.
It is enormously destructive to your loved ones,It is enormously destructive to you and your sense of self respect and self worth.
They are never worth it, they will disappoint you, that cute goth chick is going to lie there like a sack of cold meat, she isnt going to be the sexual vamp you had imagined. Lots of people out there are actually crap at sex. It isnt worth the bother, you will feel dirty guilty and shameful.
As others have said, take yourself in hand, the fantasy is far better than the reality. Get less bored, go to the gym work off the energy. Stop watching porn,it will make you objectify women.
It may also be time to ask yourself if there is an underlying issue? Low self esteem? history of abuse?
When I was younger I was onto anything that moved. I learnt the hard way.
It is enormously destructive to your loved ones,It is enormously destructive to you and your sense of self respect and self worth.
They are never worth it, they will disappoint you, that cute goth chick is going to lie there like a sack of cold meat, she isnt going to be the sexual vamp you had imagined. Lots of people out there are actually crap at sex. It isnt worth the bother, you will feel dirty guilty and shameful.
As others have said, take yourself in hand, the fantasy is far better than the reality. Get less bored, go to the gym work off the energy. Stop watching porn,it will make you objectify women.
It may also be time to ask yourself if there is an underlying issue? Low self esteem? history of abuse?
Nothing unusual in what you're thinking. You just need to grow up a bit (if you don't mind me saying) As you mature you realise what's important, and it's not the thrill of the chase or the excitement of someone new, it's the contentment that comes with having someone lovely, caring, kind and in tune with you and your life, someone that loves you despite your weaknesses and faults, a lover and a best friend. That's what matters.
Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
cbmotorsport said:
Nothing unusual in what you're thinking. You just need to grow up a bit (if you don't mind me saying) As you mature you realise what's important, and it's not the thrill of the chase or the excitement of someone new, it's the contentment that comes with having someone lovely, caring, kind and in tune with you and your life, someone that loves you despite your weaknesses and faults, a lover and a best friend. That's what matters.
Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
I dont mind you saying at all mate, maybe i do need to. I know it sounds stupid but i feel like ive missed out on all this tinder malarky everyone is into these days, but then what good comes from them apart from stds and unplanned babies 😂😂, suppose again it comes back to self esteem, loads of lads seem to get a huge kick from sleeping with lots of women.Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
dieseluser07 said:
cbmotorsport said:
Nothing unusual in what you're thinking. You just need to grow up a bit (if you don't mind me saying) As you mature you realise what's important, and it's not the thrill of the chase or the excitement of someone new, it's the contentment that comes with having someone lovely, caring, kind and in tune with you and your life, someone that loves you despite your weaknesses and faults, a lover and a best friend. That's what matters.
Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
I dont mind you saying at all mate, maybe i do need to. I know it sounds stupid but i feel like ive missed out on all this tinder malarky everyone is into these days, but then what good comes from them apart from stds and unplanned babies ????, suppose again it comes back to self esteem, loads of lads seem to get a huge kick from sleeping with lots of women.Concentrate on what you've got, appreciate it, actively choose to love her and make your lives better and the rewards will be immense.
The lads that I knew that were the ladies men and the envy of us all when we were younger are mostly a bit lonely these days, they blew it with the girlfriends they had because they couldn't commit/cheated and ended up the oldest swingers in town, still trying to pull in their middle aged state.
Maybe you need to get it out of your system. Just be fair to your other half and don't blow a good thing for some cheap gratification, you'll regret it.
Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff