Possible romance scam ...
Possible romance scam ...
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uk66fastback

Original Poster:

18,409 posts

301 months

Friday 1st February 2019
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I don't usually post in The Lounge but this seems like the right place, seeing as there isn't a 'Relationships' part of PH (probably should be)

I am 95% sure a friend of mine is probably involved in a romance scam. I've known him since I was was 14. We're both just past mid-50s. He was widowed about three years ago.

He's got three kids so that takes up a lot of his time but he's back looking at the usual online sites (PoF, Match etc) - not that he is after a full-blown relationship I reckon, but someone of the fairer sex to take out of a weekend in his Boxster, go somewhere nice, see a film, have a meal etc, would be nice.

He's had a couple of lunchtime dates in the past year - not come to anything. Anyway for about 2/3 weeks now he's been in touch with a Thai woman. She lives about five miles away from him. He contacted her on one of these sites, and then they started messaging, then WhatsApping each other off the site - quite personal stuff, income, house ownership etc. Straight away she said she was just back in Thailand for a month (convenient) and goes there every year at this time, even though she has a job and two kids (early teens and one at university - local). She has been travelling round the islands, sending him pics of her at the beach, with her friends, in the sea etc. Harmless in themselves but not the sort of pics you'd send to someone you didn't know ...

She was telling him about her early flights and she couldn't sleep because her friends were noisy etc. Daft stuff. Anyway, then they spoke, seemed to go okay he said. On the phone for half an hour or whatever. Of course when he recalled all this, I couldn't believe it - and feel sure it is a scam. I said these pics could be from anyone's Facebook page or anything. One thing that did jump out was that a couple of the pics of her when he sent them over and I opened them in Photoshop, were screengrabs from a phone as they had the black area top and bottom. So not shots take using a phone, but screengrabs of photos of this woman - strange.

I said, look this sounds like a scam, she has removed her profile from the site already I think ... I have read before about pics being taken down but not the whole profile - again, weird and the signs of a scam.

Anyway, I thought someone who likes taking selfies of themselves that much would definitely has a Facebook page, well, she won't give him the link yet she says, personal stuff on there etc. Well, he's already had chapter and verse from her about her ex, who was in court this last week in the UK for domestic abuse - (so the hard luck story is building up) ... and she is trying to buy him out of the house they share(d). Again, a sob story, woe is me etc.

Yesterday he had a WhatsApp video call with her, with her showing him (on the phone) her parents house etc ... I said, was it her from the photos, difficult to tell he said, I think so ... !

Anyway, she is due back in the next 10 days or so (so she says) and wants to meet him on Feb 13 - I mean, meeting someone for the first time, the day before Valentine's Day, really? I am convinced she will ring him on Feb 11 and say I've lost my ticket please wire me the money to get another etc, or my mum needs an eye operation before I can leave Thailand, please send money via Western Union etc ... all I have said to him is: sounds like a scam, don't lose more than you can afford etc!

Time will tell. I do have pics, which I am NOT posting. I've tried the old reverse photo thing but nothing comes up - small chance anyway as they are screengrabs of original pics.

What else can I do, apart from tell him it is most likely a scam ...

Mojooo

13,291 posts

210 months

Friday 1st February 2019
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As you say, wait and see if a request is made for money

This is a well known scamand there ARE loads of websites giving advice, show him this
https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/a-z-of-fraud/dat...

g3org3y

22,479 posts

221 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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uk66fastback said:
What else can I do, apart from tell him it is most likely a scam ...
I think you've done all you can do tbh.

If she pulls the 'need money for <insert tragedy/emergency>" line, more fool him if he transfers any cash.

Just be there to pick up the pieces when it all goes to st. That's what friends do.

bristolbaron

5,381 posts

242 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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Say what you want about Thai romance scammers, but they’ve got balls..

getmecoat

elanfan

5,527 posts

257 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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Baddum tish!

Did make I larf it did.

GT03ROB

14,024 posts

251 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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As long as he send no money nothing to really lose! Would he really send any money to someone he hadn't met?

V8covin

10,210 posts

223 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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I don't see anything wrong with having a 1st date on Feb 13.
Just make sure you convince him not to send any money to a person...it might not even be a woman... he's never seen in the flesh !

Andeh1

7,600 posts

236 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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Mojooo said:
As you say, wait and see if a request is made for money

This is a well known scamand there ARE loads of websites giving advice, show him this
https://www.actionfraud.police.uk/a-z-of-fraud/dat...
Send him this link, and discuss with him in person to make sure he gets it!!

Tell him to be very careful if she starts hinting at/ requesting monies. That'd be the next step of the scam!

Keep us updated please!

eltax91

10,763 posts

236 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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You said she lives a few miles away from him? Surely if this is a typical scam then she of course doesn’t, hasn’t he mentioned or spoken about local places, schools, restaurants or anything with her?

Surely he would be able to call bullst pretty quickly as she will have zero clue what he’s talking about??

jet_noise

6,096 posts

212 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
quotequote all
elanfan said:
Baddum tish!

Did make I larf it did.
Yoda from Bristol (or maybe Cornwall) smile

ApOrbital

10,588 posts

148 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
quotequote all
elanfan said:
Baddum tish!

Did make I larf it did.
You ok yoda ?

Big Nanas

4,260 posts

114 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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A friend of mine fell victim to a very similar scam but luckily didn't send any money. It was literally months before she realised it was a scam.

He 'lived' nearby too, but conveniently worked on offshore oil and was 'away' a lot.

I'd ask him to test her local knowledge (subtly of course). If she lives five miles away then she should know the area pretty well, so get his to ask about pubs etc..or try to trick her perhaps.

buggalugs

9,285 posts

267 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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I know someone who got done. Very similar setup, then as you suspect she needed money for a plane ticket to come see him. He sent it, then her bag got stolen and she needed more. He sent more. Etc etc. You just can’t help some people.

uk66fastback

Original Poster:

18,409 posts

301 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
quotequote all
I've said about the local knowledge thing. I said to ask where her child goes to school etc ... he said he did and she said in the name of the city not far from them, so he didn't get any specifics. Likewise she knew a couple of the local districts of the city but didn't know a couple of others (which anyone living there would know the name of - ones you see on street signs) ... She blamed her over-reliance on GPS/sat nav as the reason why ... yeah, okay ...

If she is legit and he ends up having a nice time with her going dutch in the UK I'll be a) fking amazed but b) will still remain somewhat cynical ...

Eyersey1234

3,085 posts

109 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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As others have said this sounds like a scam, all you can do is be there for him if it goes tits up.

eltax91

10,763 posts

236 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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Eyersey1234 said:
As others have said this sounds like a scam, all you can do is be there for him when it goes tits up.
FTFY

anonymous-user

84 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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Thai women are the most manipulative out.
You are bob on to think SCAM

f1nn

2,694 posts

222 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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He should message her asking for her for money for a plane ticket/family emergency and see what happens....

If your friend has not got the common sense to see through this, no amount of advice from you will help him, he’s fked.

bobtail4x4

4,412 posts

139 months

Saturday 2nd February 2019
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f1nn said:
.

If your friend has not got the common sense to see through this, no amount of advice from you will help him, he’s fked.
thats the last thing he is likely to get.

anonymous-user

84 months

Sunday 3rd February 2019
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How old is she supposed to be?