The Phenomenon of The 1.9TDi Pleb...
Discussion
(Apologies to PHers who own this type of engined-vehicle, this attack is obviously not in any way hurled accordingly.)
For a long time, the regularly bolshy on-road activities of VW-Audi motors bearing this badge of dishonour upon their wretched rumps, has been a matter for a growing truism that the drivers therein are broadly speaking, complete gits.
Many, many is the time when these smoking barges have not only conspired to ratchet up the MLM (midlle lane moron) quotient but they have been at the forefront of what PHers will be broadly aware of as that hateful, spiteful contingent sent by Beelzebub to consciously harangue and frustrate our keen progress forth, namely, that pitiful mindset of the smaller willied, spineless goon, the deliberate, overtaking 'blocking tactician.'
The culprits are, in no particular order of resentment, the Passat and A4 or A6 rep stylist.
The astonishing inadequacy of last night's no mark illustrates the effect perfectly.
Tri-carriageway and traffic lights. Left lane peels off to the left after a wee while, the right hand pair present a cracking stretch of thrappmac, topped off with a delightful roundabout for moderate fans of the modus operandum keenus corneratum.
Yours truly approaching with Tubis on full song, moving over to the right for a PHer's divine right of generally substantial green lightitude several seconds hence...
Captain Audi A6 1.9TDi pulls out sans indication and although slightly ignorant and representative of little or no common roadcraft, I think little of it: a respectable looking shirt and tie guy, the bastion of office management, he will surely expend his reasonable, black smoking 0-30 torque spread to batter the utility van to his left and then make way for the thumping warhead looming aft?
But no! Captain sensible stays on the right board, his twin pipes wheezing their increasingly smokey futility whilst a certain Bavarian muncher pents up despairingly, hoping for common sense and order to prevail.
We're both well clear of the traffic light traffic and numb nuts is hogging the 3rd: I indicate left, intending to pull two lanes over and expunge him safely up the inside. He's that kind of drooler.
Happily, no sonner has my indicator flashed once than our man swings aside: I remain in the outside lane and let the remainder of 3rd gear do the talking.
However, no sooner has my rightful charge resumed than Dufus II of Tw@ttville savagely veers back out, half a car's width to entirely sully my passage: the anchors are brutally applied, the horn smashed, the red mist dispensed: this appalling bastard simply could not handle the fact that he was being out performed and in inadequate desperation, was prepared to actually cause an accident.
Moving back over, point duly made, I tried to bury my contempt and just renail the matter.
Predictably, Il Knobmeister was gesticulating wildly and it was with great satisfaction that I indicated by distance 'twixt thumb and forefinger my estimation of his probable manhood, all rounded off with a savage Agincourt wave and an altogether brutal, accelerative condemnation.
He followed me along a 40 zone some way along, screaming up behind me, lights all ablaze and horn a-honking but I chose to ignore him. As I turned off, I could see him mouthing off, a beaten mollusc of lower middle class inadequacy and testament to the rampant feebleness of mind that threatens all PHers when performing what is our duty by birthright.
I fear for our ilk, I really do.
May your Hoon go with you (and be careful out there!)
DeR.
For a long time, the regularly bolshy on-road activities of VW-Audi motors bearing this badge of dishonour upon their wretched rumps, has been a matter for a growing truism that the drivers therein are broadly speaking, complete gits.
Many, many is the time when these smoking barges have not only conspired to ratchet up the MLM (midlle lane moron) quotient but they have been at the forefront of what PHers will be broadly aware of as that hateful, spiteful contingent sent by Beelzebub to consciously harangue and frustrate our keen progress forth, namely, that pitiful mindset of the smaller willied, spineless goon, the deliberate, overtaking 'blocking tactician.'
The culprits are, in no particular order of resentment, the Passat and A4 or A6 rep stylist.
The astonishing inadequacy of last night's no mark illustrates the effect perfectly.
Tri-carriageway and traffic lights. Left lane peels off to the left after a wee while, the right hand pair present a cracking stretch of thrappmac, topped off with a delightful roundabout for moderate fans of the modus operandum keenus corneratum.
Yours truly approaching with Tubis on full song, moving over to the right for a PHer's divine right of generally substantial green lightitude several seconds hence...
Captain Audi A6 1.9TDi pulls out sans indication and although slightly ignorant and representative of little or no common roadcraft, I think little of it: a respectable looking shirt and tie guy, the bastion of office management, he will surely expend his reasonable, black smoking 0-30 torque spread to batter the utility van to his left and then make way for the thumping warhead looming aft?
But no! Captain sensible stays on the right board, his twin pipes wheezing their increasingly smokey futility whilst a certain Bavarian muncher pents up despairingly, hoping for common sense and order to prevail.
We're both well clear of the traffic light traffic and numb nuts is hogging the 3rd: I indicate left, intending to pull two lanes over and expunge him safely up the inside. He's that kind of drooler.
Happily, no sonner has my indicator flashed once than our man swings aside: I remain in the outside lane and let the remainder of 3rd gear do the talking.
However, no sooner has my rightful charge resumed than Dufus II of Tw@ttville savagely veers back out, half a car's width to entirely sully my passage: the anchors are brutally applied, the horn smashed, the red mist dispensed: this appalling bastard simply could not handle the fact that he was being out performed and in inadequate desperation, was prepared to actually cause an accident.
Moving back over, point duly made, I tried to bury my contempt and just renail the matter.
Predictably, Il Knobmeister was gesticulating wildly and it was with great satisfaction that I indicated by distance 'twixt thumb and forefinger my estimation of his probable manhood, all rounded off with a savage Agincourt wave and an altogether brutal, accelerative condemnation.
He followed me along a 40 zone some way along, screaming up behind me, lights all ablaze and horn a-honking but I chose to ignore him. As I turned off, I could see him mouthing off, a beaten mollusc of lower middle class inadequacy and testament to the rampant feebleness of mind that threatens all PHers when performing what is our duty by birthright.
I fear for our ilk, I really do.
May your Hoon go with you (and be careful out there!)
DeR.
VW AUDI TDi driver are becoming the biggest gimps on the road , ive often overtaken a golf/pissat or an A3/A4 for them to then sit up my arse trying to prove a point that thier car is better i suppose. its when they follow onto a twisty A/B road you can wave bye bye when their over hyped german crud cant keep up with the focus 
He's probably posting something to the effect of: "Some t1t in a Merc(sic) was driving up my arse!" on the 'Bitter and twisted, if I'd earned more sales points I could have got sat nav, I know the Travelodge staff by first names, Travelling Rep Forum' by now.
If, as you say, this nobber had no awareness of other road users, he was probably a bit shocked at finally finding his rear view mrror and seeing 3 tonnes of Bavarian beeftek hoving into view and subsequently soiled himself.
Its what happens when drivers of slow cars forget that there are faster cars than theirs in existence IMO.
Drive responsibly and carry a claw hammer
Dave
If, as you say, this nobber had no awareness of other road users, he was probably a bit shocked at finally finding his rear view mrror and seeing 3 tonnes of Bavarian beeftek hoving into view and subsequently soiled himself.
Its what happens when drivers of slow cars forget that there are faster cars than theirs in existence IMO.
Drive responsibly and carry a claw hammer
Dave
I experienced similar empty headedness from a 350Z driver on Sunday. Ambling uphill along a narrow, twisty road I noted a 350Z charge up behind me to the point where I couldn't even see his headlamps.
A quick dab of my brakes was enough to ignite him
On the horn, shouting all sorts I then adopted my road rage management persona which largely involves ignoring the prat behind, making good progress whilst not letting him get into any sort of position to pose a threat to me.
My actions seemed to inflame him further, particularly my road positioning (improving my sight lines) which he took as an attempt to stop him overtaking (a useful safety measure too).
I didn't react at all to any of his other gestures, light flashing or general idiocy which brought him to boiling point
Hopefully that ruined his Sunday
A quick dab of my brakes was enough to ignite him
On the horn, shouting all sorts
I then adopted my road rage management persona which largely involves ignoring the prat behind, making good progress whilst not letting him get into any sort of position to pose a threat to me. My actions seemed to inflame him further, particularly my road positioning (improving my sight lines) which he took as an attempt to stop him overtaking (a useful safety measure too
). I didn't react at all to any of his other gestures, light flashing or general idiocy which brought him to boiling point
Hopefully that ruined his Sunday
derestrictor said:
Alot!!!
Great piece mate. I've never seen the red mist put down so well.
Plus, and this could be a bit of a wierd one, I agree with you. And I drive two of those said TDI's - Golf and Passat. I would like to add that at least they are chipped, so not your normal TDI. But it does happen an increasing ammount. The problem I have is that everyone thinks that I will be the slow one and so consider it their right to pull out at the last second as you described.
If anything half-decent was coming up behind me, I'd pull over like a shot -
a) to get a good look,
b) because I know I can't win, and
c) theres so few good cars in Ireland, if they don't peel off all guns blazing, I'll plant myself on their bumper until they do.
But as I said, great piece.
I had a diesel A2 courtesy car once. Nice and torquey - for 5 seconds. Pull out to pass someone and wahey off we go, quick or what! Then a few seconds later halfway through the overtake it would run out of revs and you'd slam it into the next gear hoping for some more gogo juice, think you were about to die due to the oncoming traffic. IMO dangerous. Had a 1.4petrol model after this and it was much nicer to drive.
It is amusing to watch out for the tractors with a red D and a red i which I think denotes the higher power output models. They have a habit of trying their 'look at my torque' trick when I'm in the TVR. Obviously they've never been in a really fast car before. Heck, as long as I rev the nuts off it my 1.8T A6 keeps up with a 2.5TDi Passat (road proven).
Obviously the larger output tractor engines have a bit more oomph, but the 1.9, 2.0, 2.2s are not as quick as their owners might like to think.
Nice and economical though.
It is amusing to watch out for the tractors with a red D and a red i which I think denotes the higher power output models. They have a habit of trying their 'look at my torque' trick when I'm in the TVR. Obviously they've never been in a really fast car before. Heck, as long as I rev the nuts off it my 1.8T A6 keeps up with a 2.5TDi Passat (road proven).
Obviously the larger output tractor engines have a bit more oomph, but the 1.9, 2.0, 2.2s are not as quick as their owners might like to think.
Nice and economical though.
Ted - why didn't you just let him past?
Your post reminded me of my journey last Sunday. Driving from Buckingham to Aylesbury, niiiice road for the enthusiast. Caught up with an A6 4.2 Allroad registration GUM 800T (hard to forget that one). Road clears, off he sprints in an automatic kickdown, lift up your skirt kind of way. I just follow him. He couldn't keep it on his side of the road at all, I wasn't about to pass him - we were already doing 20mph over the posted limit and although it would have been a very easy thing to do I decided it would be a little reckless and I had nothing to prove.
He probably went home and told his mates how he beat a TVR in his great V8. Uh huh.
I would have enjoyed that stretch of road much more without GUM 800T in front of me, and I'd have be long gone into the distance so as not to inconvenience him, but no, he obviously had something to prove.
Your post reminded me of my journey last Sunday. Driving from Buckingham to Aylesbury, niiiice road for the enthusiast. Caught up with an A6 4.2 Allroad registration GUM 800T (hard to forget that one). Road clears, off he sprints in an automatic kickdown, lift up your skirt kind of way. I just follow him. He couldn't keep it on his side of the road at all, I wasn't about to pass him - we were already doing 20mph over the posted limit and although it would have been a very easy thing to do I decided it would be a little reckless and I had nothing to prove.
He probably went home and told his mates how he beat a TVR in his great V8. Uh huh.
I would have enjoyed that stretch of road much more without GUM 800T in front of me, and I'd have be long gone into the distance so as not to inconvenience him, but no, he obviously had something to prove.
PT, I'll probably get flamed for this but why not just let the guy pass as soon as possible, even slow down a bit/pull in to make life easier for them?
You said you weren't in a hurry and this guy obviously was, surely the best place for a pi55ed off driver is not glued to your bumper, getting more and more irate. And you never know, he might have had good reason to be in such a hurry, like on a promise or something........
You said you weren't in a hurry and this guy obviously was, surely the best place for a pi55ed off driver is not glued to your bumper, getting more and more irate. And you never know, he might have had good reason to be in such a hurry, like on a promise or something........
Ahonen said:
This problem of blocking idiots (generally in 3-series, Mercs or Fords) isn't a problem when I'm in the quattro - they seem to leap out of the way, tugging their forelocks, before I even need to lift off the throttle. Which is nice.
Exactly true. The Quattro does look rather menacing in the rear view mirror though, like it would kick an obstructing car's head in at slight provocation.
Let's face it, 99% of company cars are 1.9D's I have absolutely no idea why anyone would accept such a thing and PAY FOR IT! If you ask me, it betrays a level of idiocy, that would account for the downright selfish behaviour and "I'm the only person in the world" nonsense.
I've got a mate who's got a whole host of interesting machinery but it sits on his drive going rusty. ie:-Did 20 miles last year......total madness and totally beyond me. If I ever did become a pyramid status fighter, I would still drive some noisy overpowered shed to work!
I've got a mate who's got a whole host of interesting machinery but it sits on his drive going rusty. ie:-Did 20 miles last year......total madness and totally beyond me. If I ever did become a pyramid status fighter, I would still drive some noisy overpowered shed to work!
DJFish said:
PT, I'll probably get flamed for this but why not just let the guy pass as soon as possible, even slow down a bit/pull in to make life easier for them?
You said you weren't in a hurry and this guy obviously was, surely the best place for a pi55ed off driver is not glued to your bumper, getting more and more irate. And you never know, he might have had good reason to be in such a hurry, like on a promise or something........
I'd have to agree.
Isn't not letting someone past when they're faster than you an action that we all hate and a sign of petty mindedness? I'd have just pulled over and got on with my life
JagLover said:
The biggest FLF (Fast Lane F*ckwits) that I have encountered have been Mercedes drivers.
I have had a number in front of me, doing exactly the same speed, or a few MPH more, than the cars to their left with a mile of empty road space in front of them.
Completely agree here.
Usually men preening about in SLKs or Sports Coupes.
Is there a car which is less masculine than either of these ?
I know what I'd choose given the choice between either of these and a bus pass.
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