Discussion
Posting this in the health matters section to hopefully get a balanced response & avoid the keyboard warriors that often spoil genuine questions/threads.
Whilst I fully agree that the "just F'ing get on with it" approach of my generations elders may have been a bit to harsh & the availability of an understanding ear may have avoided the 2 suicides that my group of friends in our youth had to suffer, I do wonder if we have gone a bit to far in the other direction. Or should I say the youth have hijacked the good intents of support to use it as a weapon to do less work/effort.
Basically the lazy have grabbed the mental health agenda with both hands and are milking it for all it is worth.
I am not looking for reasons or justifications just people opinions to see how out of touch I really am. It would be great to get the rough age of those opinions to see if they vary greatly over the age groups.
Mr 50ish...……..
Whilst I fully agree that the "just F'ing get on with it" approach of my generations elders may have been a bit to harsh & the availability of an understanding ear may have avoided the 2 suicides that my group of friends in our youth had to suffer, I do wonder if we have gone a bit to far in the other direction. Or should I say the youth have hijacked the good intents of support to use it as a weapon to do less work/effort.
Basically the lazy have grabbed the mental health agenda with both hands and are milking it for all it is worth.
I am not looking for reasons or justifications just people opinions to see how out of touch I really am. It would be great to get the rough age of those opinions to see if they vary greatly over the age groups.
Mr 50ish...……..
Edited by jonny996 on Monday 13th May 17:21
Mr 52 here!
Good post.
I work in the field of Behaviour Change which whilst not psychology, requires me to retain a modicum of understanding of that field. Were it not for this, I suspect I might lean towards the man-up, suck-it-up camp.
Today, we're very good at determining the the factors that cause any number of mentally-rooted disorders; far better than we have ever been and thus better at determining if someone is genuinely affected or not and sometimes the remedy.
Like many things in this field, there's a spectrum. At one end you have stress that may be temporary or it may be an all-consuming inhibitor. We know today that left unaddressed, stress can lead to any number or physical ailments and shorten life whilst limiting it along the way. 20 or 30 years ago, that knowledge didn't exist to the level it does today so those that may have been stressed in the past but were fortunate to escape from that, begrudge a generation that has all the support they need.
As you move across the spectrum you find depression. This is not a new thing but recognition of it is (relatively). Again, someone from an older generation that may have suffered in the past and got through it or learned to deal with it begrudge the apparent abundance of support available today.
You then have the influence of a changing society. Since the 80s, more kids are raised in single-parent homes. Families seem to fracture more easily so whereas in the past, a mother, father or sibling may be all the guiding support that's needed to avert someone prone to mental illness from barrelling too far off track, that support has been diluted replaced by healthcare professionals who generally are able to apply care and help a little too far down the road than is ideal.
For example.... For sometime I noticed common patterns of behaviour amongst a few of my friends (none of whom know each other) on social media, specifically the constant posting of things they 'intended' to do but little of what they were doing or had done. "Thinking of trying that new pub in town", "Turkey or Crete or Spain? Choices Choices!" ....that type of thing. Profile photos constantly change and an incessant need to post photos of them when they were younger. One example and you'd consider it just to be an odd trait but several very different people doing the same....?
What I've since determined is that these traits are common amongst those with validation issues, something that is rooted in childhood when the support and validation on your endeavours that you would expect from your parents is not provided; often (but not always) replaced with criticism. So those people emerge into adulthood with any number of issues normally manifested in either low self-esteem, lack of confidence or constantly seeking validation for everything they do (or would like to do). Applying this insight to my social media friends and we do indeed find them with 'challenging' childhoods.
So it comes down to us knowing more and be able to do more. One of the ways to deal with the issue is to talk about which in turn fosters the belief that everyone's a snowflake. Some are. Most aren't.
Good post.
I work in the field of Behaviour Change which whilst not psychology, requires me to retain a modicum of understanding of that field. Were it not for this, I suspect I might lean towards the man-up, suck-it-up camp.
Today, we're very good at determining the the factors that cause any number of mentally-rooted disorders; far better than we have ever been and thus better at determining if someone is genuinely affected or not and sometimes the remedy.
Like many things in this field, there's a spectrum. At one end you have stress that may be temporary or it may be an all-consuming inhibitor. We know today that left unaddressed, stress can lead to any number or physical ailments and shorten life whilst limiting it along the way. 20 or 30 years ago, that knowledge didn't exist to the level it does today so those that may have been stressed in the past but were fortunate to escape from that, begrudge a generation that has all the support they need.
As you move across the spectrum you find depression. This is not a new thing but recognition of it is (relatively). Again, someone from an older generation that may have suffered in the past and got through it or learned to deal with it begrudge the apparent abundance of support available today.
You then have the influence of a changing society. Since the 80s, more kids are raised in single-parent homes. Families seem to fracture more easily so whereas in the past, a mother, father or sibling may be all the guiding support that's needed to avert someone prone to mental illness from barrelling too far off track, that support has been diluted replaced by healthcare professionals who generally are able to apply care and help a little too far down the road than is ideal.
For example.... For sometime I noticed common patterns of behaviour amongst a few of my friends (none of whom know each other) on social media, specifically the constant posting of things they 'intended' to do but little of what they were doing or had done. "Thinking of trying that new pub in town", "Turkey or Crete or Spain? Choices Choices!" ....that type of thing. Profile photos constantly change and an incessant need to post photos of them when they were younger. One example and you'd consider it just to be an odd trait but several very different people doing the same....?
What I've since determined is that these traits are common amongst those with validation issues, something that is rooted in childhood when the support and validation on your endeavours that you would expect from your parents is not provided; often (but not always) replaced with criticism. So those people emerge into adulthood with any number of issues normally manifested in either low self-esteem, lack of confidence or constantly seeking validation for everything they do (or would like to do). Applying this insight to my social media friends and we do indeed find them with 'challenging' childhoods.
So it comes down to us knowing more and be able to do more. One of the ways to deal with the issue is to talk about which in turn fosters the belief that everyone's a snowflake. Some are. Most aren't.
It depends on if you believe if we have free will. My own personal opinion is that we largely have no real agency over our mental state. We’re products of our genes and our environment, that’s why I find the notion that the individual is sovereign so damaging to society.
We’re like a giant organism made up of billions of parts, all interconnected and affecting each other’s lives and states of mind. But that doesn’t mean we have zero agency. We do have some control over our actions, but I think it’s limited.
Therefore, we need to view how the younger generations have been raised, schooled and what society has exposed them to. The speed and amount of information they are bombarded with is hard to comprehend. The social etiquette of yesteryear has been replaced by a mind bending array of information heavy applications that constantly demand their attention. Couple that with the generation x attitude to parenting, where being best friends with your child is top of the agenda, and it’s a recipe for more stress, anxiety and mental health issues.
We’re like a giant organism made up of billions of parts, all interconnected and affecting each other’s lives and states of mind. But that doesn’t mean we have zero agency. We do have some control over our actions, but I think it’s limited.
Therefore, we need to view how the younger generations have been raised, schooled and what society has exposed them to. The speed and amount of information they are bombarded with is hard to comprehend. The social etiquette of yesteryear has been replaced by a mind bending array of information heavy applications that constantly demand their attention. Couple that with the generation x attitude to parenting, where being best friends with your child is top of the agenda, and it’s a recipe for more stress, anxiety and mental health issues.
Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff