Bored of buying
Discussion
I’ve never been the most materialistic person but when I was a child there were things I really wanted. As an adult I also coveted some things - cars and bikes of course but at one point wanted a nice house, quality furniture, original pictures, watches and even nice clothes. However, that limited urge to buy seems to have dwindled to the point where I’m not sure I really want anything. Even my desire for cars and bikes has dropped off a cliff (objectively it would be hard to find something to top my current bike and the downsides of owning a nice car seem to outweigh the benefits).
When I first moved to NZ I spent three months by myself with just the clothes I’d bought plus a bed and the most basic kitchen equipment (bought whilst I was waiting for family and belongings to arrive from the UK). It actually felt quite liberating not having any stuff.
Am I just getting old? Anyone else feel the same?
When I first moved to NZ I spent three months by myself with just the clothes I’d bought plus a bed and the most basic kitchen equipment (bought whilst I was waiting for family and belongings to arrive from the UK). It actually felt quite liberating not having any stuff.
Am I just getting old? Anyone else feel the same?
I'm just the same and have been for quite some time.
Without sounding like I'm bragging I've got far more cash savings than I know what to do with but there's just nothing that really takes my interest any more that I want to treat myself to, it looks like I'll just have to retire early and use my money for living expenses.
Without sounding like I'm bragging I've got far more cash savings than I know what to do with but there's just nothing that really takes my interest any more that I want to treat myself to, it looks like I'll just have to retire early and use my money for living expenses.
Esceptico said:
I’ve never been the most materialistic person but when I was a child there were things I really wanted. As an adult I also coveted some things - cars and bikes of course but at one point wanted a nice house, quality furniture, original pictures, watches and even nice clothes.
You've had plenty of money, and you spent it on material things. You now realise they haven't brought the fulfillment you now want as you get older.People who haven't had the means before still crave those material things, which is why things like The Lottery exist.
If and when people acquire the financial wherewithall, they will either get consumed by it until either it's all gone or they are, or they will do as you have, and realise that 'stuff' isn't actually what's important as long as you have the luxury of choice.
PS. Presumably you still have the cars, bikes, nice house, quality furniture, original pictures, watches and clothes.
I am getting less and less excited about buying new tech. New Xbox is coming this year and I will get one, but in the past I was really excited when a new console came out and couldn’t wait. Now I am not feeling the same. I’m not overly fussed. Same with TVs. I have an old oled. Pretty decent. New ones are better. No real motivation to upgrade. Car is fine. Faster ones out there but mine is ok. I guess it comes with getting older.
I am much the same, I think I want stuff but haven't a clue what I would want. I also realised that many people don't like other people who have nice things, so to flaunt wealth for the sake of it (jewelry, overtly branded clothing etc) is just a nonsense really.
People think I'm mad when I say winning the lottery would be a curse, but I don't think they realise the potential emptyness that would follow after the initial spending is over.
The real enjoyment in life comes from doing things, learning things or creating things. A recent example for me is that I could have bought an office chair, but I made one from a car seat instead. It is a one off and I enjoyed making it more than I would enjoy buying one.
People think I'm mad when I say winning the lottery would be a curse, but I don't think they realise the potential emptyness that would follow after the initial spending is over.
The real enjoyment in life comes from doing things, learning things or creating things. A recent example for me is that I could have bought an office chair, but I made one from a car seat instead. It is a one off and I enjoyed making it more than I would enjoy buying one.
JulianPH said:
I tend to find most people lust after stuff when they can't really afford it, then when they have the money to buy these things they decide they actually aren't important and they would rather keep the security their cash/investments offer.
yep I finished a lease on a lovely merc realising that I'd rather have had that 10k in my pension pot. Every day I look at cars, think about buying, then look out of the window at my utterly reliable well specced 3k Mondeo diesel and close the laptop!
I spent my whole career taking the next job, ignoring loyalty for a pay rise. Often followed with a better weekend toy, or in the end a bigger house. I achieved a dream I never thought I would in building my own place with my wife In 2018. We are 37 and I now realise that stuff is just that, it’s stuff. My striving is to spend time with my kids, nothing else.
I was offered the chance again recently to jump ship, 3 years into this job, and probably a pay rise that would allow the wife to stop working. I declined it because right now I’m home a lot and the new role is back to travelling.
When you have the luxury to choose to have the things you coveted, it’s much easier to feel comfortable with not wanting them
I was offered the chance again recently to jump ship, 3 years into this job, and probably a pay rise that would allow the wife to stop working. I declined it because right now I’m home a lot and the new role is back to travelling.
When you have the luxury to choose to have the things you coveted, it’s much easier to feel comfortable with not wanting them
MikeM6 said:
I am much the same, I think I want stuff but haven't a clue what I would want. I also realised that many people don't like other people who have nice things, so to flaunt wealth for the sake of it (jewelry, overtly branded clothing etc) is just a nonsense really.
People think I'm mad when I say winning the lottery would be a curse, but I don't think they realise the potential emptyness that would follow after the initial spending is over.
The real enjoyment in life comes from doing things, learning things or creating things. A recent example for me is that I could have bought an office chair, but I made one from a car seat instead. It is a one off and I enjoyed making it more than I would enjoy buying one.
You can still do things when you've got lots of money, you know. People think I'm mad when I say winning the lottery would be a curse, but I don't think they realise the potential emptyness that would follow after the initial spending is over.
The real enjoyment in life comes from doing things, learning things or creating things. A recent example for me is that I could have bought an office chair, but I made one from a car seat instead. It is a one off and I enjoyed making it more than I would enjoy buying one.
It’s a healthy place to be when you don’t feel the urge to buy things imo.
There’s a very good documentary on Netflix/YouTube called “Minimalism”. As you can probably workout, It basically promotes a less materialistic way of living and talks about how you can’t buy your way to happiness. Worth checking out.
There’s a very good documentary on Netflix/YouTube called “Minimalism”. As you can probably workout, It basically promotes a less materialistic way of living and talks about how you can’t buy your way to happiness. Worth checking out.
Psychologists formulated a theory for this which I studied on a management course many years ago.
Basically in your 20's and 30's you go through an accumulation phase, cars, house, holidays, watches, etc and once you've achieved those 'goals', you move onto the next phase in your 40's and 50's You become more contented and less materialistic.
I can't recall the name of it but seems fairly accurate for me anyway.
Basically in your 20's and 30's you go through an accumulation phase, cars, house, holidays, watches, etc and once you've achieved those 'goals', you move onto the next phase in your 40's and 50's You become more contented and less materialistic.
I can't recall the name of it but seems fairly accurate for me anyway.
Doofus said:
Esceptico said:
I’ve never been the most materialistic person but when I was a child there were things I really wanted. As an adult I also coveted some things - cars and bikes of course but at one point wanted a nice house, quality furniture, original pictures, watches and even nice clothes.
You've had plenty of money, and you spent it on material things. You now realise they haven't brought the fulfillment you now want as you get older.People who haven't had the means before still crave those material things, which is why things like The Lottery exist.
If and when people acquire the financial wherewithall, they will either get consumed by it until either it's all gone or they are, or they will do as you have, and realise that 'stuff' isn't actually what's important as long as you have the luxury of choice.
PS. Presumably you still have the cars, bikes, nice house, quality furniture, original pictures, watches and clothes.
I had a target annual salary, which in my mind would mean I could have everything I wanted; I’m not talking supercars and mansions but I wanted a Porsche, I like nice watches, nice double garage.
As I crept up on this figure, I started to realise it just wouldn’t be enough as I would always be looking for the next best thing. This moving goal post would get me down and made worse knowing that lots of people would love to be in my situation that I was unhappy with.
One day, whilst on social media I saw a quote which really resonated with me - “wealth is not about having lots of money, but having lots of options”.
I really took this on and my outlook has become to be comfortable with the option of having luxury if I want it.
So back to the OP - i go through phases and tend to find those phases focus on specific interests; but if I’m not enjoying spending money, I don’t.
Edited by M22s on Sunday 16th August 10:43
Edited by M22s on Sunday 16th August 10:45
I certainly buy less and want less. Certainly having financial security is much more important as you get older. At 25 you have a very long runway and can make mistakes , get into debt, do crazy things. I certainly did.
Later you need to build in a bit of safety. I will probably buy another car but not fussed. The most important thing for me is new experiences.
I still work about 30 hours a week at 71 and in non CV times will catch up on some travel that I had planned.
In the current environment I spend very little.
Later you need to build in a bit of safety. I will probably buy another car but not fussed. The most important thing for me is new experiences.
I still work about 30 hours a week at 71 and in non CV times will catch up on some travel that I had planned.
In the current environment I spend very little.
Im 28 in my early 20s thought nothing of spending money on my cars either road car or my track car. Even just 2 years ago started building my first race car and was all set to do my first year of club racing in april. Ive changed jobs over the years and now been in a job for the past year where I feel I could stay for a while. However over the last year my priorities started to change but still tried to put that aside and get started with the racing.
Then covid hit the racing season got put on hold and the money I built up over the year something just flicked over in my head and thought all that money ive spent what have I actually got to show for it. So back in april I got rid of the unit I was renting to store my race stuff put all that in storage started selling spares I had lying around. Ive managed to pay of my daily I had on hp and now in the process of getting on the property market.
I don't have any drive right now for racing infact im struggling to get interested in watching it on the tv. Ive also stopped buying stuff that I don't really need in fact it took me a week to decide to buy some new tools in work which was only £200.
Just put in an offer for a house so hopefully that gets accepted and my next chapter gets started.
Then covid hit the racing season got put on hold and the money I built up over the year something just flicked over in my head and thought all that money ive spent what have I actually got to show for it. So back in april I got rid of the unit I was renting to store my race stuff put all that in storage started selling spares I had lying around. Ive managed to pay of my daily I had on hp and now in the process of getting on the property market.
I don't have any drive right now for racing infact im struggling to get interested in watching it on the tv. Ive also stopped buying stuff that I don't really need in fact it took me a week to decide to buy some new tools in work which was only £200.
Just put in an offer for a house so hopefully that gets accepted and my next chapter gets started.
Doofus said:
You can still do things when you've got lots of money, you know.
Course you can, but spending becomes more and more boring the easier it is. Remember the first nice thing you could afford? Remember saving up for something you really wanted and the joy of finally getting it? If you've got loads of money then it the fun is just not there. Obtaining something (legally) despite a lack of funds is far more gratifying than obtaining something because of a surplus of funds.
MikeM6 said:
Doofus said:
You can still do things when you've got lots of money, you know.
Course you can, but spending becomes more and more boring the easier it is. Remember the first nice thing you could afford? Remember saving up for something you really wanted and the joy of finally getting it? If you've got loads of money then it the fun is just not there. Obtaining something (legally) despite a lack of funds is far more gratifying than obtaining something because of a surplus of funds.
Doofus said:
MikeM6 said:
Doofus said:
You can still do things when you've got lots of money, you know.
Course you can, but spending becomes more and more boring the easier it is. Remember the first nice thing you could afford? Remember saving up for something you really wanted and the joy of finally getting it? If you've got loads of money then it the fun is just not there. Obtaining something (legally) despite a lack of funds is far more gratifying than obtaining something because of a surplus of funds.
I do most car repairs myself, and as well as (mostly) enjoying the process, the main reason I do it is because I enjoy the feeling of getting one up on "the system" by fixing something, which means I can have something otherwise denied me by my economic circumstances.
If I had money, I could still do my own spannering, but i doubt the satisfaction would be there.
RDMcG said:
I certainly buy less and want less. Certainly having financial security is much more important as you get older. At 25 you have a very long runway and can make mistakes , get into debt, do crazy things. I certainly did.
Later you need to build in a bit of safety. I will probably buy another car but not fussed. The most important thing for me is new experiences.
I still work about 30 hours a week at 71 and in non CV times will catch up on some travel that I had planned.
In the current environment I spend very little.
I could have written this word for word.Later you need to build in a bit of safety. I will probably buy another car but not fussed. The most important thing for me is new experiences.
I still work about 30 hours a week at 71 and in non CV times will catch up on some travel that I had planned.
In the current environment I spend very little.
A year on, decided it was time to stop work ( Architect ) and just offer help to friends on odd jobs. Yesterday was up a ladder staining the roof of the pub play equipment. The day before pointing up a loose flashing on another friend's house.
My New Years Resolution was to not buy any new clothes or shoes for the year and have kept to it so far..
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