Granddad advice needed
Discussion
I'm in imminent danger of becoming a grandparent for the first time, and for reasons of, respectively, dying early, and being a spectacular s
thead (him rather than me, although...), I never had a granddad, so have no real reference points for what you're supposed to do.
Obviously, I'd like to be a helpful and positive influence and all that kind of stuff, plus it's clearly essential to turn my grandson into a petrolhead as soon as possible. I'm no expert in child development but suspect he may struggle to reach the pedals for at least a few months.
So, any experiences, ideas, suggestions welcome, from either end of the relationship. Equally, things to avoid would be good too. Cheers
thead (him rather than me, although...), I never had a granddad, so have no real reference points for what you're supposed to do. Obviously, I'd like to be a helpful and positive influence and all that kind of stuff, plus it's clearly essential to turn my grandson into a petrolhead as soon as possible. I'm no expert in child development but suspect he may struggle to reach the pedals for at least a few months.
So, any experiences, ideas, suggestions welcome, from either end of the relationship. Equally, things to avoid would be good too. Cheers
From the outset make it clear that whenever the littl'un is with you it's "Grandad rules"
My kids know that when they stay over with Grand parents it's a whole different set of rules (late bed times, being spoilt, fizzy drink, etc). On the flip side they know when they come back it's my parents rules
My kids know that when they stay over with Grand parents it's a whole different set of rules (late bed times, being spoilt, fizzy drink, etc). On the flip side they know when they come back it's my parents rules
E63eeeeee... said:
Obviously, I'd like to be a helpful and positive influence and all that kind of stuff,
Nope, that's the parents' job. You job is just to be popular, by having absolutely no rules. The kid eats what they want, stays up as late as they want, watches what they want, and mum and dad spend the next week trying to repair the damage you've done to their parenting aspirations. I'm a Grandad. Its great.
I worked away for most of my children's growing years so its fascinating to watch the grandkids growing up.
My Grandson is 6 now.
He knew his English, Russian, Arabic and Japanese alphabets at 2+, that's written as well as spoken!!!. He was so thirsty to learn.
He is a little insecure the last two years since his sister came along.
She nearly died at 2 weeks old and so got and still gets a lot of attention from my son and his wife.
Understandable but me and Grammy see it as our job to make sure that the love and attention is balanced, so he gets plenty of one on one time when he visits.
Yes, a bit spoilt but then that's part of the job.
I just bought him a bow and arrow set for the garden. Had to get me one too so that we can play together.
He's not interested in cars. Doesn't like the ride in electric one we got him but his sister, at two years, is a proper little adventurer and I'm pretty sure she will enjoy riding around in her own electric off-roader.
Not sure when we have them next as Covid has stopped them staying for a lot of the first half of the year.
They wear you out but they are beautiful and special.
I worked away for most of my children's growing years so its fascinating to watch the grandkids growing up.
My Grandson is 6 now.
He knew his English, Russian, Arabic and Japanese alphabets at 2+, that's written as well as spoken!!!. He was so thirsty to learn.
He is a little insecure the last two years since his sister came along.
She nearly died at 2 weeks old and so got and still gets a lot of attention from my son and his wife.
Understandable but me and Grammy see it as our job to make sure that the love and attention is balanced, so he gets plenty of one on one time when he visits.
Yes, a bit spoilt but then that's part of the job.
I just bought him a bow and arrow set for the garden. Had to get me one too so that we can play together.
He's not interested in cars. Doesn't like the ride in electric one we got him but his sister, at two years, is a proper little adventurer and I'm pretty sure she will enjoy riding around in her own electric off-roader.
Not sure when we have them next as Covid has stopped them staying for a lot of the first half of the year.
They wear you out but they are beautiful and special.
I alway tell people I've got the best job in the world. Being a Grandad.
It really really is.
Praise them when they're right. Tell them off when they're wrong.
Show them and teach them EVERYTHING.
Cars,boats,planes, bridges, diggers (take them to diggerland) lorries, buses, steam trains,definitely steam trains. Rockets and space.
Build stuff in the garage.
Did I mention I love being a grandad?
It really really is.
Praise them when they're right. Tell them off when they're wrong.
Show them and teach them EVERYTHING.
Cars,boats,planes, bridges, diggers (take them to diggerland) lorries, buses, steam trains,definitely steam trains. Rockets and space.
Build stuff in the garage.
Did I mention I love being a grandad?
LordGrover said:
Do not sit in your rocking chair, in your comfy slippers being an old man.
Get on the floor, roll about and run about with him/her - it'll keep you 'young' and they'll appreciate it.
This is good advice. I'm the dad in the middle and my young kids have a grandad of each type. Get on the floor, roll about and run about with him/her - it'll keep you 'young' and they'll appreciate it.
My dad is the 'boring' grandad who doesn't really do much with them beyond telling them to be careful.
My father in law is the 'fun' grandad who doesn't mind the noise, gets stuck-in and plays games non-stop.
I think it's fair to say my kids have quietly agreed on a favourite grandad.
I am granddad to twin 5 yr old girls.
House rules disappear when they are here. Granddad/Gran rules apply.
Our dog is the real favourite. He “speaks” to them when they phone/Skype etc..
We travel round for days out, trips, do stuff that entertains and educates them, often in ways they cannot do at home.
Coconuts......they use my drill to drain them ( supervised), crack them open. We made Slime last week. Come based “volcano”.
Planning to make another bug hotel with them soon.
Read to them, play games.
You are honour bound to be daft.
House rules disappear when they are here. Granddad/Gran rules apply.
Our dog is the real favourite. He “speaks” to them when they phone/Skype etc..
We travel round for days out, trips, do stuff that entertains and educates them, often in ways they cannot do at home.
Coconuts......they use my drill to drain them ( supervised), crack them open. We made Slime last week. Come based “volcano”.
Planning to make another bug hotel with them soon.
Read to them, play games.
You are honour bound to be daft.
I've been honoured with four grandchildren, so I have a few observations.
Never, ever, offer advice on bringing the grandkids up to the parents. It won't be appreciated, especially if it turns out you are right. Support, the parents in whatever other way you can. For a long while what they need most is sleep, so think about how you can possibly help there. Later on, when the eyes in the back of the head stage starts, be around to supervise.
When a little brother or sister comes along, it is a very difficult time for the elder child. A grandparent is ideally placed to give the attention that the elder sibling is missing.
As far as you can, help out financially. Your own kids will be reeling with the shock of how much all the kit, clothes, etc. is costing. Make it a bit easier for them. Spoiling your grandkids with presents is one thing, but turning up with a bale of nappies or a few drums of baby formula will be appreciated - as long as it is the right type!
Kids have no preconceptions about age. They'll treat you just the same as anyone else. So, as said above, roll on the floor with them, play football, be a face painting victim. Don't sit back and try to be an impartial observer of the proceedings.
The best thing about grandkids is that you can spend time with them, but afterwards GIVE THEM BACK. You also don't have to deal with the poopy end. I am enjoying my grand children more than bringing up my own kids, to be honest, which seemed to go past in a blur.
A few days ago my 20 month old grandson was playing with a plastic multi-storey car park, running his car down a long spiral ramp. He is only just starting to form sentences, but can occasionally come out with something totally unexpected. He wanted me to play with him and stuck a car in my hand, saying, 'Ere ya go, Pops.
Happy grandparenting!
Never, ever, offer advice on bringing the grandkids up to the parents. It won't be appreciated, especially if it turns out you are right. Support, the parents in whatever other way you can. For a long while what they need most is sleep, so think about how you can possibly help there. Later on, when the eyes in the back of the head stage starts, be around to supervise.
When a little brother or sister comes along, it is a very difficult time for the elder child. A grandparent is ideally placed to give the attention that the elder sibling is missing.
As far as you can, help out financially. Your own kids will be reeling with the shock of how much all the kit, clothes, etc. is costing. Make it a bit easier for them. Spoiling your grandkids with presents is one thing, but turning up with a bale of nappies or a few drums of baby formula will be appreciated - as long as it is the right type!
Kids have no preconceptions about age. They'll treat you just the same as anyone else. So, as said above, roll on the floor with them, play football, be a face painting victim. Don't sit back and try to be an impartial observer of the proceedings.
The best thing about grandkids is that you can spend time with them, but afterwards GIVE THEM BACK. You also don't have to deal with the poopy end. I am enjoying my grand children more than bringing up my own kids, to be honest, which seemed to go past in a blur.
A few days ago my 20 month old grandson was playing with a plastic multi-storey car park, running his car down a long spiral ramp. He is only just starting to form sentences, but can occasionally come out with something totally unexpected. He wanted me to play with him and stuck a car in my hand, saying, 'Ere ya go, Pops.
Happy grandparenting!
sospan said:
I am granddad to twin 5 yr old girls.
House rules disappear when they are here. Granddad/Gran rules apply.
Our dog is the real favourite. He “speaks” to them when they phone/Skype etc..
We travel round for days out, trips, do stuff that entertains and educates them, often in ways they cannot do at home.
Coconuts......they use my drill to drain them ( supervised), crack them open. We made Slime last week. Come based “volcano”.
Planning to make another bug hotel with them soon.
Read to them, play games.
You are honour bound to be daft.
Doesn't that get you on a register?? House rules disappear when they are here. Granddad/Gran rules apply.
Our dog is the real favourite. He “speaks” to them when they phone/Skype etc..
We travel round for days out, trips, do stuff that entertains and educates them, often in ways they cannot do at home.
Coconuts......they use my drill to drain them ( supervised), crack them open. We made Slime last week. Come based “volcano”.
Planning to make another bug hotel with them soon.
Read to them, play games.
You are honour bound to be daft.
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