I altered my personality to fit in at work

[donkmeister]

Saw this on the Beeb this morning: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-54388703

I'm somewhat bemused by this... Doesn't everyone have to alter their personality to fit in at work? I know I do. I am lucky to work with people who I was friends with before we worked together, and I also have friends who I met through work, and I can safely say that they all have a "work personality". It's all about toning down the elements that others might see as conflicting with your ability to do your job, for instance if you are somewhat reckless then you don't want the people you work for (or your clients) thinking you are. Likewise, if you are especially intro or extraverted, or rebellious, or need validation in everything you do, or are diplomatic, or have a short temper, or are very tactile with others, or a hundred other traits.

Let's assume that some people don't have to filter their personality at all without just being devoid of one... Is that "perfect personality" tied to any particular ethnicity? I am really struggling to understand how a person's personality is linked to their ethnicity, I've tried to picture it and I'm just getting a 1970s vibe of racial stereotypes. Personality by its very nature is different from person to person. Perhaps someone who has a lot of experience of running Myers-Briggs Type seminars and other work-related personality testing/measuring things can offer their thoughts on the matter.

To summarise, I'm struggling to get my head around:
1) the concept that not everyone with a personality has to alter that personality to fit in at work
and
2) the concept there is a link between ethnicity and personality.

[gregs656]

Yes I think people commonly moderate their personality depending on the situation.

I am not sure ‘personality’ fits what they’re talking about in the article.

It can be destructive and hard work to hide or suppress part of your self, and more diverse environments help that IME.

[MitchT]

Bullshxt article. I'm a white middle aged male (life overflowing with privilege and opportunity, apparently ) and I've spent my working life being the person my employer wants me to be rather than myself. Unless you're a celebrity whose personality is the job, it's what you've got to do, whatever your gender, race, etc.

[Pit Pony]

My wife likes to give me the following preptalk before interviews or starting a new job.

Be yourself.

.....

...

Only less so.

I am am.good friends with a couple of ex colleagues, both of whom said to me... well yes, we knew you weren't exactly normal on the 3rd day, when you hugged the boss.

I'm good friends now with him still.

Well he looked sad...

[Polite M135 driver]

Lockdown induced working from home made me realise that i was putting an awful lot of energy in just ‘being’ at work, keeping up the social side, chatting to people. I don’t miss any of it and my work has improved a lot since I haven’t had to do it. But do I moderate my personality or opinions, rather just do stuff that I would prefer to avoid? Not really, but lucky enough to work in an environment that is very individualistic and where freedom of thought and expression, even to criticise actions of my employer, is (broadly) protected.

[cqueen]

BBC

[gizlaroc]

I think being able to replicate your peers is simply a life skill that should come naturally, those I know who don't do this are the same people who tend to struggle through life, always the ones who feel everything is against them, it is not a good trait.

We all do it and if you don't it is nothing to be proud of.

[Sophisticated Sarah]

Everyone has to ‘wear a mask’ (so to speak). Although I guess turning it into a racial issue fits the latest agenda

[nikaiyo2]

Lol stupid article.

I change how I speak, act aNd the things I talk about depending on what customer I am talking to.

[foxbody-87]

On an evening I like to drink beer and break wind frequently, during the day I am expected to be professional because the role demands that I don’t dick around with other people’s safety.
There are one or two people where I work who are absolutely “themselves” and because they are exceptions it works to an extent, if everybody was the same the place would be a nightmare

[Cocknose]

I joined the military at 16, and spent most of my formative years amongst some rather crude language and some hard men.

It made me what I am now, but I'm not sure that that behaviour would endear me to the people I now work with, in civvie street.

We all alter our behaviour, every day, at work and everywhere else. Humans are desperate to fit in with the tribe they're surrounded by, it doesn't have to be about race.

[Randy Winkman]

As a civil servant, the government department I work in has a bit of thing about "bringing your whole self to work". I have mixed feelings about it because I'm never really my "whole self" when I'm at work. I'm a professional version of myself because my real self would be slightly drunk and lazing around doing precisely nothing. But that's not the point of the idea. The idea is not not have to cover up cultural things to do with ethnicity, sexuality and other stuff which doesn't really get in the way of doing a good day's work. It's just about judging people on what matters, rather than superficial stuff.

[Mastodon2]

"I altered my personality to fit in at work", said every professional, ever.

[Johnnytheboy]

BBC identity politics ballcocks.

I am a cantankerous old st who hates almost everyone and everything.

I also sell stuff for a living.

So I alter my personality at work.

It's hardly rocket science is it?

Edit: gosh that article uses the term "micro-aggressions" an awful lot.

[Taylor James]

Try consultancy. You need to be a proper chameleon to deal with all those fragile and threatened egos. JFDI would be so much easier.

[donkmeister]

I'm glad it's not just me then. It seems like someone's thought of something that would be unfair if it were true and then written an article about it. Makes me think of the Self-righteous Brothers on Harry Enfield's TV Programme...

[donkmeister]

Johnnytheboy said:

Edit: gosh that article uses the term "micro-aggressions" an awful lot.

I prefer the terms "being a condescending dhead" and "being a bit of an ahole".
The term "micro-aggression" basically excuses someone for saying or doing something that they shouldn't have done by blaming society for the fact that they are prejudiced (but not so prejudiced that they throw racial slurs about the place).

[98elise]

Pesty said:

Lol
More white man bad it’s so hard for black people bullst.
So glad I’m taxed to pay for this bks.

Agreed.

I'm from the east end of London (so have an accent), and I dress like a tramp (at home). I'm also an introvert so dislike small talk and I prefer my real friends to people I just happen to work with.

In the workplace I tone my accent down, I wear a suit, I make small talk, and I regularly socialise with my workmates.

It's a front but it's just what you do to fit in.

[gizlaroc]

98elise said:

Agreed.

I'm from the east end of London (so have an accent), and I dress like a tramp (at home). I'm also an introvert so dislike small talk and I prefer my real friends to people I just happen to work with.

In the workplace I tone my accent down, I wear a suit, I make small talk, and I regularly socialise with my workmates.

It's a front but it's just what you do to fit in.

Too right me fam. Too right me blad.

[Randy Winkman]

Johnnytheboy said:

BBC identity politics ballcocks.

I am a cantankerous old st who hates almost everyone and everything.

I also sell stuff for a living.

So I alter my personality at work.

It's hardly rocket science is it?

Edit: gosh that article uses the term "micro-aggressions" an awful lot.

If you were Muslim would you pretend to join in with the Christmas fun? Or if you were gay, would you cover that up? Lots of people feel the pressure to do things like that at work.