Did your life turn out as expected?
Discussion
When I was at school I didn’t really have a plan for the future (and I didn’t get any useful guidance from my family) but even so when I look back over my life if you had told younger me I would have been very surprised.
At school maths and sciences were by far my best and favourite subjects so to have ended up doing economics and working in finance was quite unexpected. I sort of assumed that I would become a scientist. Growing up on a council estate, getting professional qualifications and becoming middle class (and fairy well off) didn’t seem like realistic or achievable goals either (not that taking that path had even occurred to me then).
I didn’t leave the U.K. for the first time until I was 21 so although I wanted to travel I couldn’t really imagine living abroad yet so far I’ve lived in four other countries other than England.
When I was at school I managed to fail GSCE German. I still have a report from my teacher proclaiming that I had zero talent for languages . Yet somehow learning languages became a hobby after leaving school. Given how lazy I was in German class (my only claim to fame being that I managed to fall asleep - more than once!) I doubt younger me would have believed I would have invested hundreds of hours memorising 2000 Japanese characters (to be fair, 3 years ago when I thought I’d learn a bit of Japanese before going on holiday I wouldn’t have believed that either).
My older brother was mad about motorbikes but crashed frequently so I was quite anti-bike when growing up. Yet somehow (and against my wife’s wishes) I ended up riding too and it has supplanted my desire for fast cars.
I wonder whether in ten years there will be more stuff I didn’t see coming? If positive I hope so as it would be a bit boring to have everything planned.
How has your life been different than expected?
At school maths and sciences were by far my best and favourite subjects so to have ended up doing economics and working in finance was quite unexpected. I sort of assumed that I would become a scientist. Growing up on a council estate, getting professional qualifications and becoming middle class (and fairy well off) didn’t seem like realistic or achievable goals either (not that taking that path had even occurred to me then).
I didn’t leave the U.K. for the first time until I was 21 so although I wanted to travel I couldn’t really imagine living abroad yet so far I’ve lived in four other countries other than England.
When I was at school I managed to fail GSCE German. I still have a report from my teacher proclaiming that I had zero talent for languages . Yet somehow learning languages became a hobby after leaving school. Given how lazy I was in German class (my only claim to fame being that I managed to fall asleep - more than once!) I doubt younger me would have believed I would have invested hundreds of hours memorising 2000 Japanese characters (to be fair, 3 years ago when I thought I’d learn a bit of Japanese before going on holiday I wouldn’t have believed that either).
My older brother was mad about motorbikes but crashed frequently so I was quite anti-bike when growing up. Yet somehow (and against my wife’s wishes) I ended up riding too and it has supplanted my desire for fast cars.
I wonder whether in ten years there will be more stuff I didn’t see coming? If positive I hope so as it would be a bit boring to have everything planned.
How has your life been different than expected?
Same as you, I had no real idea of what I wanted to do as a career at school. Hadn't even considered the option of what I currently do for a living (QS/PM in the construction industry) but it's worked out well on the whole.
In a similar vein, I do sometimes find myself thinking about "what-ifs", and consequently how my life might now be different.
For example, when I first moved down to London I ended up living in a house-share for a couple of years. The landlord owned another house on the same road, and rooms became vacant at the same time in both places.
My now wife went to view the room in the other place, but it was a box-room & too small so he mentioned he had another vacancy a few doors down.
That was 15 years ago and the rest is history, but I do wonder what I'd be doing now if she had decided the first room she saw was OK, we hadn't met etc.
In a similar vein, I do sometimes find myself thinking about "what-ifs", and consequently how my life might now be different.
For example, when I first moved down to London I ended up living in a house-share for a couple of years. The landlord owned another house on the same road, and rooms became vacant at the same time in both places.
My now wife went to view the room in the other place, but it was a box-room & too small so he mentioned he had another vacancy a few doors down.
That was 15 years ago and the rest is history, but I do wonder what I'd be doing now if she had decided the first room she saw was OK, we hadn't met etc.
Up to 14 I wanted to fly Helicopters in the Royal Navy.
Then the bar got raised for that due to defence cuts and I was self aware enough to realise it was a big ask.
I went to sea instead with the aim of becoming Captain of a ship, having an Aston Martin, earning a comfortable wage & buying a house like the one a female friend of mine’s parents owned.
I now have that job, own that house & married her sister. So yeah.
Pretty much. Just need the car...
...which is in the 18 month financial plan. ??
Then the bar got raised for that due to defence cuts and I was self aware enough to realise it was a big ask.
I went to sea instead with the aim of becoming Captain of a ship, having an Aston Martin, earning a comfortable wage & buying a house like the one a female friend of mine’s parents owned.
I now have that job, own that house & married her sister. So yeah.
Pretty much. Just need the car...
...which is in the 18 month financial plan. ??
t when I was young and getting expelled etc.Trevor555 said:
Nope.
I planned six years in the Royal Engineers, then join the Police.
Cancer at 21 put a stop to all that.
But I can't complain, I've done ok, just not what I planned.
Police took me as a part timer, so not all hopes lost.
Wow, that puts things in perspective.I planned six years in the Royal Engineers, then join the Police.
Cancer at 21 put a stop to all that.
But I can't complain, I've done ok, just not what I planned.
Police took me as a part timer, so not all hopes lost.
Edited by Trevor555 on Tuesday 22 December 21:30
How are you now - all good or still under treatment?
(Have no idea how long ago 21yo was for you!!)
I often think of the what it's.
I wanted to work in sales when I was at school, I saw my dad get a brand new cavalier every 2 years and thought it was great.
I'm now 41 still in sales, and only worked for 3 companies.
Contemplating a change before I'm too old but with only GCSE's I can't do much else nowadays.
I have 3 kids (never really wanted any) and met my now wife 17 years ago by taking a job I saw an advertisement for in a local paper one lunchtime I went to the pub (never did that normally)
Lots of what if's and enjoy looking back, my fear is continuing on the treadmill of life I'm on and just getting old.
I always thought I'd win the lotto at some point and have probably lost years of my life day dreaming about my dream warehouse full of cars.
One regret I guess is that I always wanted to work in the USA, working for a company that is global meant I could but no degree meant a visa was difficult even with work.
I'm sat with a job offer now for another sales role and just resigning myself that that's me now
I wanted to work in sales when I was at school, I saw my dad get a brand new cavalier every 2 years and thought it was great.
I'm now 41 still in sales, and only worked for 3 companies.
Contemplating a change before I'm too old but with only GCSE's I can't do much else nowadays.
I have 3 kids (never really wanted any) and met my now wife 17 years ago by taking a job I saw an advertisement for in a local paper one lunchtime I went to the pub (never did that normally)
Lots of what if's and enjoy looking back, my fear is continuing on the treadmill of life I'm on and just getting old.
I always thought I'd win the lotto at some point and have probably lost years of my life day dreaming about my dream warehouse full of cars.
One regret I guess is that I always wanted to work in the USA, working for a company that is global meant I could but no degree meant a visa was difficult even with work.
I'm sat with a job offer now for another sales role and just resigning myself that that's me now
Psycho Warren said:
what class of ship are you a captain of?
you can always use the pension lump sum when you retire to get the aston.
Have been on lots, but am currently Captain of a dredger.you can always use the pension lump sum when you retire to get the aston.
Not as glamorous as my Container Ship days but 3 weeks on 3 weeks off is a good routine!
No fat pensions here! I missed the Defined Benefit years so am squirreling away what I can!
OzzyR1 said:
Trevor555 said:
Nope.
I planned six years in the Royal Engineers, then join the Police.
Cancer at 21 put a stop to all that.
But I can't complain, I've done ok, just not what I planned.
Police took me as a part timer, so not all hopes lost.
Wow, that puts things in perspective.I planned six years in the Royal Engineers, then join the Police.
Cancer at 21 put a stop to all that.
But I can't complain, I've done ok, just not what I planned.
Police took me as a part timer, so not all hopes lost.
Edited by Trevor555 on Tuesday 22 December 21:30
How are you now - all good or still under treatment?
(Have no idea how long ago 21yo was for you!!)
I had 10 months of chemo and radiotherapy in a clinical trial of a new treatment, been clear since, for that I'm very grateful. It changes your view on many things in life, and I've really lived mine to the full since.
No plans, hated school with a passion mainly because i was am dyslexic, did not know that back in the day, you were just labeled the thick kid.
Left school with zero exams, but had worked since i was 11 in a hardware shop so had a much better understanding on the world. What i will say about school is it was a very Toxic environment full of kids who had older brothers who were pro shop lifters/ football hooligans/ drug pushers, thieves all while still dunking and diving with a regular job, there destiny was sort of mapped out for them. Lucky for me i did not live near school so did not mix with them on that level, looking back this was a blessing.
Always been very good with my hands, i could look at someone say rebuilding a engine or gearbox and pick it up very quickly with outstanding confidence, it was this confidence that set me on my way.
From an early age i had always done work from home, painted bikes, motorcycle and car parts etc, fitted car stereo ETC my father had always given me the space and tools to do this.
So i liked tinkering and would like to make a living doing just that, what type of living i had no idea about that. At age 19 i took on a industrial unit and started working with motorcycle engines parts, quite specialized engine work, little did i know i would end up where i am today, if you had said to me i would be living in the house i have with the cars around me i would have sad you were smoking something !
Did i plan any of it, No, just worked hard and kept on pushing and moving forward, 30 years on still going strong, but you still need to keep pushing forward and never sit still, we broke up on Friday, but went into work today and have been doing emails this evening.
So no plans, i had ideas what i wanted out of life and just worked to get them, nothing comes easy but if you put the hard work in and have some luck you can make it work.
Sorry if this comes across as a brag, its not, just how you can achieve something with out much off a plan.
Left school with zero exams, but had worked since i was 11 in a hardware shop so had a much better understanding on the world. What i will say about school is it was a very Toxic environment full of kids who had older brothers who were pro shop lifters/ football hooligans/ drug pushers, thieves all while still dunking and diving with a regular job, there destiny was sort of mapped out for them. Lucky for me i did not live near school so did not mix with them on that level, looking back this was a blessing.
Always been very good with my hands, i could look at someone say rebuilding a engine or gearbox and pick it up very quickly with outstanding confidence, it was this confidence that set me on my way.
From an early age i had always done work from home, painted bikes, motorcycle and car parts etc, fitted car stereo ETC my father had always given me the space and tools to do this.
So i liked tinkering and would like to make a living doing just that, what type of living i had no idea about that. At age 19 i took on a industrial unit and started working with motorcycle engines parts, quite specialized engine work, little did i know i would end up where i am today, if you had said to me i would be living in the house i have with the cars around me i would have sad you were smoking something !
Did i plan any of it, No, just worked hard and kept on pushing and moving forward, 30 years on still going strong, but you still need to keep pushing forward and never sit still, we broke up on Friday, but went into work today and have been doing emails this evening.
So no plans, i had ideas what i wanted out of life and just worked to get them, nothing comes easy but if you put the hard work in and have some luck you can make it work.
Sorry if this comes across as a brag, its not, just how you can achieve something with out much off a plan.
slopes said:
Nope, not even close.
I always wanted to be a Para, all i ever wanted to be. A brain tumour and constant medication put paid to that idea.
After that i wanted to be a scuba diver on a research vessel, the illness took care of that too so i stopped planning for the future after that.
That's sad to hear.I always wanted to be a Para, all i ever wanted to be. A brain tumour and constant medication put paid to that idea.
After that i wanted to be a scuba diver on a research vessel, the illness took care of that too so i stopped planning for the future after that.
I hope you've managed to find other things to aim for, and had some fun along the way.
But I know it's hard to stop looking back.
jonwm said:
Contemplating a change before I'm too old but with only GCSE's I can't do much else nowadays.
If you have any decent ideas, have you ever thought about starting a company on the side/in the evening and seeing how it goes?Not done it myself, but know a couple of people who started out selling stuff on Etsy (one was a girl who did pottery as a hobby, the other a weekend cake-maker), but both had talent, worked hard and got good feedback from customers which led to more sales Both are now making enough to have left their previous jobs and do what was a hobby for them full-time.
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff