The conversation that changed your life
Discussion
Years back when I fresh out of Uni I wanted to go into finance and I was working at a junior level. I happened to have a conversation with a guy from across the office - we didn't work together or anything so it was just a chance conversation.
He was probably 20 years older than me and probably where I thought I wanted to be in 20 years. We had a general chat and he was telling me about his pay, working hours and general experience of life. And I thought to myself that this isn't really where I want to be. That week I started looking at alternative jobs and ended up finding a job doing what I do now.
When I look back, I have generally enjoyed what I have been doing and I think if I had stayed in finance it would have been a boring grind.So I was possibly quite 'lucky' to have that chat.
I was reading the other thread on here about luck and how you can make your own luck by taking opportunities and mixing with people you maybe normally wouldn't - basically expanding your chances to find new ideas or opportunities
So maybe my conversation wasn't so exciting but clearly its had a big influence on me and work life has such a big effect on your general wellbeing.
What was the conversation that changed your life?
He was probably 20 years older than me and probably where I thought I wanted to be in 20 years. We had a general chat and he was telling me about his pay, working hours and general experience of life. And I thought to myself that this isn't really where I want to be. That week I started looking at alternative jobs and ended up finding a job doing what I do now.
When I look back, I have generally enjoyed what I have been doing and I think if I had stayed in finance it would have been a boring grind.So I was possibly quite 'lucky' to have that chat.
I was reading the other thread on here about luck and how you can make your own luck by taking opportunities and mixing with people you maybe normally wouldn't - basically expanding your chances to find new ideas or opportunities
So maybe my conversation wasn't so exciting but clearly its had a big influence on me and work life has such a big effect on your general wellbeing.
What was the conversation that changed your life?
2 spring to mind
1: Does he realy need this operation?
I was 10 at the time
Yes
What happens if we don't say yes.
He'll die before he's 16
2. Does he really need this operation?
i was 14 at the time
Yes
If he doesn't, will he die?
Yes before he is 21.
Sorta changes your perspective on things somewhat
1: Does he realy need this operation?
I was 10 at the time
Yes
What happens if we don't say yes.
He'll die before he's 16
2. Does he really need this operation?
i was 14 at the time
Yes
If he doesn't, will he die?
Yes before he is 21.
Sorta changes your perspective on things somewhat
I used to work in the family business. Walking home from the shop one evening with my dad we passed a homeless guy digging down into a waste bin looking for something edible in the sandwich boxes that had been thrown in there.
I said to my dad, “look at that dirty bugger.”
Dad said, “that was someone’s little boy once and don’t you forget it.”
Changed my life.
I said to my dad, “look at that dirty bugger.”
Dad said, “that was someone’s little boy once and don’t you forget it.”
Changed my life.
A chance conversation with my mother when I was about 14:
I was saying how I wanted a 911 turbo, in black blah blah blah...
She said, “when you’ve worked all your life to save up that money, the last thing you’ll want to do is blow it all on a car, when the day comes you won’t be able to do it...”
Nothing more was said about it at the time and we carried on with our day.
fast forward about six years and I was just about to buy a Subaru imprezza Turbo with all of the money that I had saved up from decent paying jobs as a young man. I’d picked out the colour and the spec and I was literally sat at the dealer salesman‘s desk about to sign the paperwork.
that conversation with my mother came ringing in my head like a bell... i thought about all the part time jobs I’d done as a kid, all the hours commuting to jobs I didn’t like, all the hours spent over and above the job description getting ahead... and I was about to cash the lot into a blooming car.... I couldn’t do it!!! I walked out of the showroom having not signed the paperwork.
The money that I was going to spend on that car I put on a deposit for my first house instead, renovated the house, remortgaged it and used that money to start up my first business.
I am now nearly 15 years down the line and countless millions of pounds later, it turns out to be the best decision I ever made not to buy that imprezza.
That chance conversation was an absolute game changer for me.
RIP mom...
I was saying how I wanted a 911 turbo, in black blah blah blah...
She said, “when you’ve worked all your life to save up that money, the last thing you’ll want to do is blow it all on a car, when the day comes you won’t be able to do it...”
Nothing more was said about it at the time and we carried on with our day.
fast forward about six years and I was just about to buy a Subaru imprezza Turbo with all of the money that I had saved up from decent paying jobs as a young man. I’d picked out the colour and the spec and I was literally sat at the dealer salesman‘s desk about to sign the paperwork.
that conversation with my mother came ringing in my head like a bell... i thought about all the part time jobs I’d done as a kid, all the hours commuting to jobs I didn’t like, all the hours spent over and above the job description getting ahead... and I was about to cash the lot into a blooming car.... I couldn’t do it!!! I walked out of the showroom having not signed the paperwork.
The money that I was going to spend on that car I put on a deposit for my first house instead, renovated the house, remortgaged it and used that money to start up my first business.
I am now nearly 15 years down the line and countless millions of pounds later, it turns out to be the best decision I ever made not to buy that imprezza.
That chance conversation was an absolute game changer for me.
RIP mom...
Probably the friend who said he wanted help with a business idea. We had a chat, I dismissed the idea as a fantasy, but I offered to help him for free.
I worked with him closely and taught him what he needed to know. A year or so later he's flying. He's taken everything I showed him on board and made a huge success of it.
Being a pragmatist I decided maybe he wasn't so crazy after all, ate humble pie, and joined in!
That was the start of the rest of my life and the end of being a wage slave. So in hindsight the initial chat was the best conversation I ever had.
I worked with him closely and taught him what he needed to know. A year or so later he's flying. He's taken everything I showed him on board and made a huge success of it.
Being a pragmatist I decided maybe he wasn't so crazy after all, ate humble pie, and joined in!
That was the start of the rest of my life and the end of being a wage slave. So in hindsight the initial chat was the best conversation I ever had.
dimots said:
Probably the friend who said he wanted help with a business idea. We had a chat, I dismissed the idea as a fantasy, but I offered to help him for free.
I worked with him closely and taught him what he needed to know. A year or so later he's flying. He's taken everything I showed him on board and made a huge success of it.
Being a pragmatist I decided maybe he wasn't so crazy after all, ate humble pie, and joined in!
That was the start of the rest of my life and the end of being a wage slave. So in hindsight the initial chat was the best conversation I ever had.
So what happened? He gave you a % of the company?I worked with him closely and taught him what he needed to know. A year or so later he's flying. He's taken everything I showed him on board and made a huge success of it.
Being a pragmatist I decided maybe he wasn't so crazy after all, ate humble pie, and joined in!
That was the start of the rest of my life and the end of being a wage slave. So in hindsight the initial chat was the best conversation I ever had.
I've got terminal cancer...
Is how it started with a mate of mine, no more than a weekend drinking buddy actually. It was him, not me. We were having a few beers and a takeaway curry at my house. I asked him what he planned to do with his taxi business...
That was 17 years ago, he died six months later, I bought his business and never looked back.
Is how it started with a mate of mine, no more than a weekend drinking buddy actually. It was him, not me. We were having a few beers and a takeaway curry at my house. I asked him what he planned to do with his taxi business...
That was 17 years ago, he died six months later, I bought his business and never looked back.
Me to doctor 30 secs after waking from a 3 week coma.
Me....Will I ever walk again
Doc.....No. Highly unlikely.
Changed my life, and the outlook on it for ever.
I’d been married 5 weeks, my father was 7 floors above me in same hospital being treated for leukaemia, my best mate was 2 floors below dying of lung failure.
Me....Will I ever walk again
Doc.....No. Highly unlikely.
Changed my life, and the outlook on it for ever.
I’d been married 5 weeks, my father was 7 floors above me in same hospital being treated for leukaemia, my best mate was 2 floors below dying of lung failure.
I was at a family member's wedding when I was 17, and a (very very) drunk uncle who was self-employed in SEO was chatting to me about what I wanted to do when I was older - his work piqued my interest and we stayed in touch afterwards.
Since then I've always been fairly 'into' e-commerce and have had a couple of businesses off the back of this - the most recently of which I sold just over a year ago for a rather hefty sum.
Still thankful to this day he spotted the bored looking teenager (well, until I found the bar would serve me regardless as they thought everyone was 18 or over...) and talked to me.
Since then I've always been fairly 'into' e-commerce and have had a couple of businesses off the back of this - the most recently of which I sold just over a year ago for a rather hefty sum.
Still thankful to this day he spotted the bored looking teenager (well, until I found the bar would serve me regardless as they thought everyone was 18 or over...) and talked to me.
Mine - not pleasant by any means, but absolutely nothing as sobering as the above.
An abusive father who used to beat me, my mum and my sister up on a daily basis for no reason ( drink?) for as long as I can remember.
As he was rather enthusiastic with exercising his fists and his belt, he would also drill into me "You are worthless - you are a no hope'r , you will amount to nothing."
As soon as I was old enough and strong enough - I could clout the f
ker right back. ( which he didn't expect ... nor did I)
His beatings of us stopped when he realised - he would get hurt.
Once I started earning - I got a house and moved my mum and sister in.
The man was a vicious. He still is.
He destroyed lives. And he still wants to terrorise my Mum.
I don't wish him dead. But I don't wish him well.
As his father was an evil fker to his son.
And he was an evil fker to his wife and kids.
I decided to get a vasectomy.
Kids were never going to happen.
Almost every day his "You are worthless" diatribe still haunts me.
An abusive father who used to beat me, my mum and my sister up on a daily basis for no reason ( drink?) for as long as I can remember.
As he was rather enthusiastic with exercising his fists and his belt, he would also drill into me "You are worthless - you are a no hope'r , you will amount to nothing."
As soon as I was old enough and strong enough - I could clout the f
ker right back. ( which he didn't expect ... nor did I)His beatings of us stopped when he realised - he would get hurt.
Once I started earning - I got a house and moved my mum and sister in.
The man was a vicious
. He still is. He destroyed lives. And he still wants to terrorise my Mum.
I don't wish him dead. But I don't wish him well.
As his father was an evil f
ker to his son.And he was an evil f
ker to his wife and kids.I decided to get a vasectomy.
Kids were never going to happen.
Almost every day his "You are worthless" diatribe still haunts me.
I woke up. strange place.
I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
ruggedscotty said:
I woke up. strange place.
I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
Nice! A great perspective.I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
First job and the boss had two days a week off, it was a large chain but his son was the area manager and would cover for the days his dad wasn't there.
This guys was awesome, used to look forward to the days when he would be in the branch.
Anyway he told me two things that have quite literally helped me through life
"Don't sweat the small stuff"
"If it won't affect your life in two years time don't worry about it".
This guys was awesome, used to look forward to the days when he would be in the branch.
Anyway he told me two things that have quite literally helped me through life
"Don't sweat the small stuff"
"If it won't affect your life in two years time don't worry about it".
21 year old me speaking to the quality inspector who had worked in the factory for the last 35 years. He said to me 'you'll be just like me, here for the rest of your life' I told him 'fk off that ain't happening'. I joined the RAF 8 weeks later.
His comments I think were deliberately said to get myself out of there and go on to better things. A good guy he was.
Freezing my tits off on nightshift gate guard with another chap. Desperately unhappy with been in the forces we got talking and he said 'I've just joined a company working offshore on ROV's' I asked 'ROV' s, what are they?` after speaking to him I put in my application to leave.
13 years after leaving the Air force and joining an offshore construction company specifically ROV I've gone places and done things I never dreamt possible. Not to mention earnt more now than a lifetime in the forces.
k off that ain't happening'. I joined the RAF 8 weeks later. His comments I think were deliberately said to get myself out of there and go on to better things. A good guy he was.
Freezing my tits off on nightshift gate guard with another chap. Desperately unhappy with been in the forces we got talking and he said 'I've just joined a company working offshore on ROV's' I asked 'ROV' s, what are they?` after speaking to him I put in my application to leave.
13 years after leaving the Air force and joining an offshore construction company specifically ROV I've gone places and done things I never dreamt possible. Not to mention earnt more now than a lifetime in the forces.
Uggers said:
I asked 'ROV' s, what are they?`
13 years after leaving the Air force and joining an offshore construction company specifically ROV I've gone places and done things I never dreamt possible. Not to mention earnt more now than a lifetime in the forces.
Anticipating a parrot, but...what *are* ROVs?13 years after leaving the Air force and joining an offshore construction company specifically ROV I've gone places and done things I never dreamt possible. Not to mention earnt more now than a lifetime in the forces.
ruggedscotty said:
I woke up. strange place.
I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
Fantastic post.I turned to the bed next to me, I asked the guy where was I ?
Welcome to Sarajevo, he replied.
I was in the German Field Military hospital, In a converted factory in Sarajevo without a scooby of how i got there. A very fuzzy mind and slowly it pieced together.
I thought to my self, Im in a strange country thousands of miles from home, and for what reason. i didnt really know. id been in an accident, i had been in a landrover that was being driven back to camp in Sipovo, when the driver struck a parked vehicle at the side of the road. knocked me out.
I woke up in sarajevo as they had a CT scanner there and they were concerned about the knock on the head, so they took me there and did a few scans to see what was going on. I had a couple of bleeds going on and they needed to do something.
Was decided to get me back to the UK, so the required arrangements were made, medical evacuation was arranged and I was airlifted back to the UK, and arrived at the wessex nurolgical.
I had some proceedures to resolve the bleeds, and life carried on from there. I was in the hospital for a few days afterwards and then was flown up to Scotland to spend sometime in a local hospital recovering. The flight up I was accompanied by a medical escort, just to make sure I got back safe and that nothing happened on the plane, in case I had a siezure, one of the possible outcomes of the surgery I had.
On that plane the girl talked away about things in general and one of the subjects came up about life.about aspirations and destiny. You know she said, what you went through you could have died, infact you were incredably lucky to survive. it was stacked against you.
But it didnt, you are still here. it will take you time to get over it and get back into it but you will get back into it. Life is unique, life is special. Life is a jigsaw.
I thought a lot about what she said, about that and about just how much sense she made. no matter what happens there is always an after, it may not be what you thought, people may no longer be there, but life goes on. we cant dwell on the past, we cant. do that and the past wins. if you sit back and give up then you give up, if you pick up the pieces put them back as best as you can then thats a damn good effort. life is a jigsaw, sometimes you lose a piece, sometimes it doesnt look right, sometimes you want to chuck it away but why would you. you are the jigsaw.
let nothing get you down, work on what you can change, what you can achieve, and let go of what you cant, let go of the things that drag you down.
underwhelmist said:
Anticipating a parrot, but...what *are* ROVs?
Underwater robots...remote operating vehicles.Some really good positive stories here.
I guess for me it probably goes back to university & was discussing with my tutor future plans after uni. My degree had kind of set me up to go & work for one of the house builders or some other building type company. My tutor basically said "look if you really want to learn something, don't do that, go find a job with one of the big US companies they will really teach you about construction & project management."
So I did. Instead of clumping round building housing estates I've travelled all over the world working on some of the biggest oil&gas projects ever. Never yet worked for a British company, only US.
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