Prison. Not for me
Author
Discussion

TTmonkey

Original Poster:

20,911 posts

276 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
I’ve not done anything worthy of a prison sentence. But if I had, and was facing a long stretch, I wouldn’t let it happen.

Just being at home in lock down is enough to make me go fekin ape. And that with having a wife along with me and being allowed out for exercise etc.

If this is just five percent the hell that prison would be, I’d top myself before getting put away.

How the hell lifers manage to get through it baffles me. This might only last at worst another six months but it’s making me feel really feked off.

And we are lucky. No job problems (yet).


OMG. Is this what it’s going to be like being retired, without much spare income!?

aaron_2000

5,407 posts

112 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
It's weird, I couldn't even bring myself to get on a train without paying for a ticket nevermind commit a crime severe enough to go to prison, yet it still terrifies me. It's the food that would be my biggest fear, I think I'd rather top myself than do a long prison stretch.

Drive it fix it repeat

1,046 posts

80 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
In prison you have no choice about your predicament. For me the frustration is that there’s nothing physically stopping me from doing what I want to other than an invisible virus and people very willing to enforce some quickly dreamed up laws and restrictions.

Drawweight

3,596 posts

145 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
O/T slightly

I've really got into watching YouTube with Reddit stories. (It's a terrible habit and I've got to stop it)

A lot of the stories come from the US and it's crazy how something that you would do in the UK that might get you a warning will get you jail time there.

Minor vandalism, a bit of light fingerness at work, getting into a fight could all potentially land you at least a few months in jail.

funkyrobot

18,789 posts

257 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
I documented my time in prison and my subsequent escape. I'm pleased to say they have released a film about it.

If you are interested, it's called Shawshank Redemption.

ChocolateFrog

34,954 posts

202 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
I can see the appeal.

No money worries.
No laundry
No cooking
Free gym.
Free TV
Free heating and hot water.

If I was starving on the street I'd probably find the nearest occupied Ferrari go have a bit of fun before enjoying a hot meal and shower on the house.

sunbeam alpine

7,249 posts

217 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
ChocolateFrog said:
I can see the appeal.

No money worries.
No laundry
No cooking
Free gym.
Free TV
Free heating and hot water.

If I was starving on the street I'd probably find the nearest occupied Ferrari go have a bit of fun before enjoying a hot meal and shower on the house.
You forgot more sex...





...although you might be a less than willing participant...


smile

Rostfritt

3,098 posts

180 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
ChocolateFrog said:
I can see the appeal.

No money worries.
No laundry
No cooking
Free gym.
Free TV
Free heating and hot water.

If I was starving on the street I'd probably find the nearest occupied Ferrari go have a bit of fun before enjoying a hot meal and shower on the house.
Do prisoners in the US get free healthcare? If so, I could imagine someone with a cancer diagnosis going out and committing a crime so they could get a sentence as long as their chemo would be. Kind of like Breaking Bad, but without hiding it.

paulguitar

35,687 posts

142 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
I've been told that if you survived boarding school then prison should be doable. I did three years as a school boarder and it felt like a decade or so.


Still don't fancy giving prison a go though.



ChocolateFrog

34,954 posts

202 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
sunbeam alpine said:
ChocolateFrog said:
I can see the appeal.

No money worries.
No laundry
No cooking
Free gym.
Free TV
Free heating and hot water.

If I was starving on the street I'd probably find the nearest occupied Ferrari go have a bit of fun before enjoying a hot meal and shower on the house.
You forgot more sex...





...although you might be a less than willing participant...


smile
Only seems to happen in people imagination, we're not in Mexico.

anonymous-user

83 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
ChocolateFrog said:
I can see the appeal.

No money worries.
No laundry
No cooking
Free gym.
Free TV
Free heating and hot water.

If I was starving on the street I'd probably find the nearest occupied Ferrari go have a bit of fun before enjoying a hot meal and shower on the house.
If you want anything other than the standard st food and soap (or smoke) then you will have money worries.

You will very likely end up in the laundry or kitchen, so thats out.

Gym? Yes its available, but its nothing you couldn't do at home, but with worse company.

TV, ok but not really worth sacrificing freedom for the ability to sit and watch 4 st channels.

Heating.... laugh

Prison, not everything its cracked up to be

Wacky Racer

41,308 posts

276 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
TTmonkey said:



OMG. Is this what it’s going to be like being retired, without much spare income!?
There's plenty of stuff that retired people can do without spending a fortune.

Free bus travel for days out.

Hiking.

Cycling.

Painting

Making plastic models.

Etc.

coppernorks

1,919 posts

75 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
Glad the OP got that bombshell off his chest.

Presumably putting his gonads in a vice is high on his not-to-do list.

Drive it fix it repeat

1,046 posts

80 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
coppernorks said:
Glad the OP got that bombshell off his chest.

Presumably putting his gonads in a vice is high on his not-to-do list.
I wouldn’t recommend it...

Saleen836

12,497 posts

238 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
Strange how you get free tv in prison but can get sent there if you don't pay the fine for not paying to watch tv out of prison rolleyes

Pothole

34,367 posts

311 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
paulguitar said:
I've been told that if you survived boarding school then prison should be doable. I did three years as a school boarder and it felt like a decade or so.


Still don't fancy giving prison a go though.
I did 10. Ditto. I think the smell and the noise would do for me these days.

big_northern_monkey

32 posts

128 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
Saleen836 said:
Strange how you get free tv in prison but can get sent there if you don't pay the fine for not paying to watch tv out of prison rolleyes
It's not free. Quid a week, 50p if you share a cell.

anonymous-user

83 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
The biggest thing about prison is no longer being in control of your life. Talk of PlayStations and TVs is pretty irrelevant when you6r not allowed to leave your room for 22 hours a day and have to go to the toilet in a bucket in front of a bloke you'd rather not share your personal space with.

glazbagun

15,356 posts

226 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
Saleen836 said:
Strange how you get free tv in prison but can get sent there if you don't pay the fine for not paying to watch tv out of prison rolleyes
And the government tried to ban book deliveries.

CoolHands

23,421 posts

224 months

Sunday 14th February 2021
quotequote all
If you think about it I’m always surprised most people come back for sentencing. Why would you if you’re facing a long stretch? Might as well do a runner.