Allowing a newly 11yr old a key and walk home 1 day a week
Allowing a newly 11yr old a key and walk home 1 day a week
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Discussion

hotchy

4,829 posts

155 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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I'm sure i had a key then. Certainly walked home from school alone from alot younger tbh. Although my mum was always home so never needed the key.

ReallyReallyGood

1,641 posts

159 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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What’s the walk home like?

Mr Pointy

13,359 posts

188 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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If my experience with the girl next door is anything to go by, make sure a neighbour has a spare key.

r159

2,534 posts

103 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Make sure their phone is charged and there are copies of your number around the house, and they know how to use the land line. They can let you know they are home.

Have they a friend who’s parent you know to use in an emergency?

Tracking software in their phone, let them know though, tell them you’re only monitoring it to start with (ahem!)

We would have had the same issue but for Covid, nearly a year on now though, we are lucky friends and Grandparents around the corner and the school is 10 mins walk away.

r159

2,534 posts

103 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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Until implants are available...spare key...

Radec

5,949 posts

76 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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I had a house key around that age, dad really drummed into me how important it was never to lose it and I've never lost of key in 30 odd years.

Also had one of these when I first got given the key which helped me in not losing it at school.

skilly1

2,902 posts

224 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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We got our son a XPLORA 4 watch. Has phone capabilities, tracking and emergency dial. You can also only allow certain numbers for him to call.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/XPLORA-children-Messages-...

t400ble

1,804 posts

150 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Ring door bell, so you can keep an eye on him?

r159

2,534 posts

103 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Smart phones are fine as long as the protection is there. Our boy gets iPhone hand me downs that the wife has locked up that tight...it became no worse than a Nokia 3100. As he got older more access has been allowed for school stuff


sociopath

3,433 posts

95 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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I used to walk home 2 miles everyday at that age. The world is no less safe than it was then, probably safer despite the safety nazis saying otherwise.

If they're sensible and understand the consequences of breaking the rules then go for it.

Mr Pointy

13,359 posts

188 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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At the risk of this turning into the Four Yorkshiremen sketch when I was 11 I had to get two buses home form school & my job was to light the fires before my parents came home from work.

I know some things are different now but if he's not cycling & there's other kids making the same journey then he needs to learn a few life skills & it seems a good opportunity to do so. The first one may be if he loses his key he gets to sit on the doorstep for a bit.

CubanPete

3,803 posts

217 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Age 11 start of secondary school was when I was given a key. Kept it in my jacket inside pocket, I have never lost a key...

No such thing as mobile phones to worry about in those days. (Though my Dad was an early adopter, and was one of the first people to get a car phone, it was fitted by a towbar company, and the main bit went in the spare wheel well!)

ClaphamGT3

12,234 posts

272 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Our daughters walked from school to the nearest station to school and catch the train one stop home then either change onto the tube for one stop or walk for 10 minutes home from the age of eleven. Had their own key and a smart phone with ‘find my iPhone’ software.

Worked well for all of us. Certainly made them more independent and saved my wife doing an afternoon school run once the youngest started.

I used to be allowed to go out on my own and explore London when I was that age. My parents only requirement was that, when on the tube, I rode in the carriage with the guard. #showingmyage

eeLee

1,008 posts

109 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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my 15-year-old had the key to our vacation place for 10 minutes to go to the cellar. The key needed straightening to go in a lock again afterwards.

he has no idea what happened and thinks he did not do it. Since I gave him the key and then tried to use it shortly after, I think it's clear.

he probably had his phone in his hand and was watching YouTube so he never saw anything.... biggrin

greygoose

9,661 posts

224 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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Is there the possibility that Yuri Geller is his father?

Blakeatron

2,566 posts

202 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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We have started letting our 11year old girl walk into town on her own, she does a bit of shopping for elderly neighbours and gets some sweets.

Been doing it since Christmas, she has an iphone and we have findmyphone enabled so we can track her if needs be.

She doesnt have a key, but we have a place to hide a key that she uses.

Next year when she starts secondary she will have to walk to school (20min walk) so thought she may as well get used to it!

AngryYorkshireman

140 posts

74 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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Both mine had keys (and alarm code) from the last term at primary and got themselves to and from school at that point.
One reasonably busy road to cross - obviously taught them how to cross properly and safely on their own first.
No phones, as school had banned them. (also nothing to get robbed for)
Showed them a safe route to go.
Easier if they are doing the same as their friends though.

Close neigbours were still taking kids/picking them up from school in the car when they were 16. Same school, easy safe route, paranoid parents.

You have to let go at some point and let them do things on their own.
Allowing them to go and sit in the park at midnight drinking when they were 13/14 was a no no though (unlike some of the parents I knew).

I had a key when I was about 8, and was taking my 5 year old brother to school on the bus. Obviously the 1970's were a lot safer smile

Mr Pointy

13,359 posts

188 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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anonymous said:
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Bicycle? You were lucky. We used to dream of having a bicycle.

Actually with the roads like they are today cycling would be a bit of a red flag for me.

littleowl

922 posts

262 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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I had a key when I was 10/11, for coming home from school on a certain day of the week.

My concern was losing it, so we devised a system where rather than take it with me, it was hidden in a fairly annoymous plantplot in the greenhouse, under a load of packets of seeds.

Stick Legs

8,924 posts

194 months

Sunday 7th March 2021
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My eldest gets the bus from school to the village green then walks the rest of the way. Has done since she was 11.
Has a key, been trustworthy.

The disadvantage of being rural is there are fewer passers by so vulnerable in the regards that no-one would see anything.
The advantage of being rural is that there are fewer passers by so less chances, plus she can always take off across the fields if a car is following for instance.

On balance we went for it and it has paid off as she is much more self reliant than some of her contemporaries.

iPhone with the track and parental snoop app as part of the deal.

Grandparents farm a mile away as well so if needs be she can ring Nan.
Another friend lives in the next village so the option is there as well to say on a stop and get off there.