Are you a chav?

[anonymous-user]

Following in from “Are you posh?”, let’s see how common you are. ( it’s for fun, don’t get worked up if you get Max points)
Chav points as follows:-
Location
Live in Essex, Kent, Herts or London
+2 Live in Medway towns or A13 corridor.
House
Council (Bought own council house + 2)
Astroturf instead of grass
Tiki bar
6x4 England flag
Car
Ford
Vauxhall (Corsa +2)
Civic but only with terrible exhaust.
Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
Full after market body kit. Bonus points if it’s half falling off or scrapes over every speed bump.
You have a van parked at your house.
King of chav mobile, fully black RR Sport +5
Family
Full fake tans (+1 for every person)
Wife had boob job ( increase only)
+1 for any children called Wayne,Darren, Jordan,Shane, Tyler, Taylor, Paige, Chantelle, Kylie or Chardonnay .
Food
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+3 if you refer to any of these as restaurants .
You still think Stella Atrocious is cool
You think Lambrini is sophisticated
You vape.
Shopping
If you’ve ever bought anything from Primark
+3 if you recently queued to get into a Primark.
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
+2 if you go to Bluewater more than twice a month.
Sport
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
+3 if you support Utd but live south of Birmingham.
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Shout at VAR decisions on TV
TV
Your TV is at least 65 in
You can name winners of several reality series (1 each up to 5 points)
You can watch Ant and Dec without having murderous thoughts.
You have The Disney Channel
Holidays
Spain, Majorca or Tenerife +1
Orlando +2
You have a double barrelled name but not a country estate.

[cobra kid]

Feeling threatened?

[craig_m67]

What’s chav short for ?
Or, its etymological root?

Anybody… Bueller?

[Sheets Tabuer]

Out of all that I only have disney+

Now I'm off to find shops where they sell grey tracksuits, which actually is a good point, where the hell do they get them, I've never seen them for sale. Is it a primark thing?

[Countdown]

Cliffe60 said:

Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Your TV is at least 65 in
Orlando +2

That's me. I didn't think Orlando. Nando's, an Audi (The Imagine) S-Line, or a large TV was automatically chav tbh.

[milfordkong]

2 - I like Nandos and have also used a McD's drive through, a McDonalds hash brown is a very fine thing.

[Jamescrs]

Always thought I could be considered a chav I mean when I'm at home my clothing of choice is jogging bottoms and a hoody which the wife says makes me a chav but im not even registering any points on the questions posted.

[devnull]

craig_m67 said:

What’s chav short for ?
Or, its etymological root?

Anybody… Bueller?

Many definitions: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav

But if you listen to the Plan B song "Ill Manors": Council Housed and Violent

[Muzzer79]

I'm sorry but there was no way I could read it with that formatting.

Cliffe60 said:

Following in from “Are you posh?”, let’s see how common you are. ( it’s for fun, don’t get worked up if you get Max points)

Chav points as follows:-

Location

Live in Essex, Kent, Herts or London
+2 Live in Medway towns or A13 corridor.

House
Council (Bought own council house + 2)
Astroturf instead of grass
Tiki bar
6x4 England flag

Car
Ford
Vauxhall (Corsa +2)
Civic but only with terrible exhaust.
Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
Full after market body kit. Bonus points if it’s half falling off or scrapes over every speed bump.
You have a van parked at your house.
King of chav mobile, fully black RR Sport +5

Family
Full fake tans (+1 for every person)
Wife had boob job ( increase only)
+1 for any children called Wayne,Darren, Jordan,Shane, Tyler, Taylor, Paige, Chantelle, Kylie or Chardonnay .

Food
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+3 if you refer to any of these as restaurants .
You still think Stella Atrocious is cool
You think Lambrini is sophisticated
You vape.

Shopping
If you’ve ever bought anything from Primark
+3 if you recently queued to get into a Primark.
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
+2 if you go to Bluewater more than twice a month.

Sport
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
+3 if you support Utd but live south of Birmingham.
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Shout at VAR decisions on TV

TV
Your TV is at least 65 in
You can name winners of several reality series (1 each up to 5 points)
You can watch Ant and Dec without having murderous thoughts.
You have The Disney Channel

Holidays
Spain, Majorca or Tenerife +1
Orlando +2

You have a double barrelled name but not a country estate.

[anonymous-user]

craig_m67 said:

What’s chav short for ?
Or, its etymological root?

Anybody… Bueller?

Years ago when it first appeared, there were suggestions that it was short for ‘Council House And Violent’ and was used by the police and certain sectors of social services/housing to describe the individuals who would typically live in social housing and spend their days causing trouble and engaging in physical violence.

How true that is, I have absolutely no idea.

[anonymous-user]

Muzzer79 said:

I'm sorry but there was no way I could read it with that formatting.

Cliffe60 said:

Following in from “Are you posh?”, let’s see how common you are. ( it’s for fun, don’t get worked up if you get Max points)

Chav points as follows:-

Location

Live in Essex, Kent, Herts or London
+2 Live in Medway towns or A13 corridor.

House
Council (Bought own council house + 2)
Astroturf instead of grass
Tiki bar
6x4 England flag

Car
Ford
Vauxhall (Corsa +2)
Civic but only with terrible exhaust.
Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
Full after market body kit. Bonus points if it’s half falling off or scrapes over every speed bump.
You have a van parked at your house.
King of chav mobile, fully black RR Sport +5

Family
Full fake tans (+1 for every person)
Wife had boob job ( increase only)
+1 for any children called Wayne,Darren, Jordan,Shane, Tyler, Taylor, Paige, Chantelle, Kylie or Chardonnay .

Food
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+3 if you refer to any of these as restaurants .
You still think Stella Atrocious is cool
You think Lambrini is sophisticated
You vape.

Shopping
If you’ve ever bought anything from Primark
+3 if you recently queued to get into a Primark.
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
+2 if you go to Bluewater more than twice a month.

Sport
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
+3 if you support Utd but live south of Birmingham.
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Shout at VAR decisions on TV

TV
Your TV is at least 65 in
You can name winners of several reality series (1 each up to 5 points)
You can watch Ant and Dec without having murderous thoughts.
You have The Disney Channel

Holidays
Spain, Majorca or Tenerife +1
Orlando +2

You have a double barrelled name but not a country estate.

Thanks for that. I bet you’re a teacher.

[ARHarh]

None of those apply to me, but then I am far too middle class.

[Nurburgsingh]

What’s the matter with Wagamama’s ?

[MDMA .]

House
Council (Brought own council house + 2)

EFA.

[P-Jay]

1 Point, for having a 'Sportline' Skoda.

Dam.

I have to say, the Disney Channel thing is an odd one to me? For a few reasons:

1) It was part of most, entry-level Sky / Virgin packages so most people had it whether they knew it, or not.
2) It was taken off-air about 6 months ago, so no one has it now.
3) I've always considered Disney to be many things, but mostly classless.

Do I gain another point for Disney+ ? I cancelled it a little while ago because the kids had seen all the Star Wars they wanted to see for the time being.

Edited by P-Jay on Friday 14th May 14:46

[Pixelpeep Z4]

Muzzer79 said:

I'm sorry but there was no way I could read it with that formatting.

Cliffe60 said:

Following in from “Are you posh?”, let’s see how common you are. ( it’s for fun, don’t get worked up if you get Max points)

Chav points as follows:-

Location
Live in Essex, Kent, Herts or London
+2 Live in Medway towns or A13 corridor.

House
Council (Bought own council house + 2)
Astroturf instead of grass
Tiki bar
6x4 England flag

Car
Ford
Vauxhall (Corsa +2)
Civic but only with terrible exhaust.
Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
Full after market body kit. Bonus points if it’s half falling off or scrapes over every speed bump.
You have a van parked at your house.
King of chav mobile, fully black RR Sport +5

Family
Full fake tans (+1 for every person)
Wife had boob job ( increase only)
+1 for any children called Wayne,Darren, Jordan,Shane, Tyler, Taylor, Paige, Chantelle, Kylie or Chardonnay .

Food
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+3 if you refer to any of these as restaurants .
You still think Stella Atrocious is cool
You think Lambrini is sophisticated
You vape.

Shopping
If you’ve ever bought anything from Primark
+3 if you recently queued to get into a Primark.
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
+2 if you go to Bluewater more than twice a month.

Sport
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
+3 if you support Utd but live south of Birmingham.
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Shout at VAR decisions on TV

TV
Your TV is at least 65 in
You can name winners of several reality series (1 each up to 5 points)
You can watch Ant and Dec without having murderous thoughts.
You have The Disney Channel

Holidays
Spain, Majorca or Tenerife +1
Orlando +2

You have a double barrelled name but not a country estate.

I'm sorry but i had to further format your format.

Devil is in the detail.

I'll forgive you if you can tell me what i changed

[otolith]

The suggestions that it stands for something are backronyms.

It's thought to be Romani in origin.

[Fast and Spurious]

0.25 points for me. Last holiday was in northern Spain and I'm not taking a full point for that, no way.

[motco]

Nurburgsingh said:

What’s the matter with Wagamama’s ?

[Muzzer79]

Pixelpeep Z4 said:

Muzzer79 said:

I'm sorry but there was no way I could read it with that formatting.

Cliffe60 said:

Following in from “Are you posh?”, let’s see how common you are. ( it’s for fun, don’t get worked up if you get Max points)

Chav points as follows:-

Location
Live in Essex, Kent, Herts or London
+2 Live in Medway towns or A13 corridor.

House
Council (Bought own council house + 2)
Astroturf instead of grass
Tiki bar
6x4 England flag

Car
Ford
Vauxhall (Corsa +2)
Civic but only with terrible exhaust.
Any make but -line model ( ST-line, GT-line)
Full after market body kit. Bonus points if it’s half falling off or scrapes over every speed bump.
You have a van parked at your house.
King of chav mobile, fully black RR Sport +5

Family
Full fake tans (+1 for every person)
Wife had boob job ( increase only)
+1 for any children called Wayne,Darren, Jordan,Shane, Tyler, Taylor, Paige, Chantelle, Kylie or Chardonnay .

Food
+1 for regular use of McD, Nando’s, Wagamama’s or KFC.
+3 for McD drive thru
+3 if you refer to any of these as restaurants .
You still think Stella Atrocious is cool
You think Lambrini is sophisticated
You vape.

Shopping
If you’ve ever bought anything from Primark
+3 if you recently queued to get into a Primark.
+2 if the rest of your clothes come from Sports Direct
+2 if you go to Bluewater more than twice a month.

Sport
Support ManUtd or Chelsea
+3 if you support Utd but live south of Birmingham.
Have Sky Sports or BT.
Shout at VAR decisions on TV

TV
Your TV is at least 65 in
You can name winners of several reality series (1 each up to 5 points)
You can watch Ant and Dec without having murderous thoughts.
You have The Disney Channel

Holidays
Spain, Majorca or Tenerife +1
Orlando +2

You have a double barrelled name but not a country estate.

I'm sorry but i had to further format your format.

Devil is in the detail.

I'll forgive you if you can tell me what i changed

Do y'know? I just read it back before you posted and thought

"Left a line after 'Location'. Crap"