Non drivers asking for lifts

[scottyp123]

I know somehow I'll probably end up getting flamed for this but what do we reckon about people that say they don't need a car but constantly ask for lifts everywhere.

I was due to go to a funeral the other day (that I didn't want to go to in the first place) and on the morning of it a non driving friend rang up and said can I pick him up before we head there. I said I was too busy with work beforehand and was cutting it fine myself.

I ended up not even going myself because I just couldn't be arsed to go but apparently my mate didn't get there either. Now he won't answer the phone and its all my fault he missed it.

The daft thing is he actually has a licence but chooses not to drive because he would rather be in the pub, and his missus has a car. I always seem to end up driving to his house for something or other and it never seems to be reciprocated.

[UnfortunateUserName]

You sound 100% reasonable to me. Say no more often.

[anonymous-user]

Sounds reasonable. I choose to walk to work, it's about 2 miles and if it's clagging it down and someone offers me a lift home - or any other day for that matter - i might gracefully accept but i never ask for one, some days i've refused a lift as i like walking more than driving.
Still drive now and then, usually towing the caravan as the wife doesn't want to - yet wanted the caravan, funny that - but for daily duties a car is a waste of money, i would do like 10 miles a week.

[r159]

I shared a house with a guy (in his early 30s) who didn’t drive, we worked together on the same shift so I’d drive him in but if went out he’d get taxis, certainly didn’t take the piss with lifts. He learned to drive, took me to work once.. after that we went back to the original arrangement.

[QuickQuack]

I'm often the one who does favours for everyone without expecting or getting anything in return, and has "mug" tattooed on his forehead, but if I were you, I might be tempted to stop trying to call him ever again.

[shih tzu faced]

The friend sounds like a user, but I suppose it depends if you were absolutely clear with him well in advance that you definitely weren’t going to go and that he’d need to make his own arrangements.

Always best to spell these things out in my experience (not saying that you didn’t btw).

[steveo3002]

dont blame you one bit , start running people about its expected

[scottyp123]

shih tzu faced said:

The friend sounds like a user, but I suppose it depends if you were absolutely clear with him well in advance that you definitely weren’t going to go and that he’d need to make his own arrangements.

Always best to spell these things out in my experience (not saying that you didn’t btw).

It was all last minute, I was planning to go but really didn't want to, he rang about 3 hours before the funeral asking fort a lift when I was up to my neck in work trying to get finished. I just kind of fobbed him off and said I didn't have time.

It pissed me off a bit that as well as getting the work finished he was now my problem as well so I just decided that I couldn't be bothered with either and went home instead.

[scottyp123]

It wasn't really a rant about just one person, it was more of a general thing, I know a couple of people that don't drive but they always seem to be caging lifts of their mates. One is my mates sister, she is constantly looking for help getting places of him and it must take up half his life, why can't they embrace the life they have chosen and just go with it, not having a car means walking or bussing it everywhere doesn't it?

[limpsfield]

The more I read of your posts Scotty, the more convinced I am that you are a time traveller stuck in the 1970s.

I have not been asked for a lift this side of the Millenium.

[shih tzu faced]

scottyp123 said:

It was all last minute, I was planning to go but really didn't want to, he rang about 3 hours before the funeral asking fort a lift when I was up to my neck in work trying to get finished. I just kind of fobbed him off and said I didn't have time.

It pissed me off a bit that as well as getting the work finished he was now my problem as well so I just decided that I couldn't be bothered with either and went home instead.

Totally see your point, the ‘friend’ sounds like he took it for granted that not only were you going to go, but that you’d also be willing and able to give him a lift. Very presumptuous and I agree, not your problem.

[scottyp123]

limpsfield said:

The more I read of your posts Scotty, the more convinced I am that you are a time traveller stuck in the 1970s.

I have not been asked for a lift this side of the Millenium.

I wish, the 70's and 80's were epic. In fact you have reminded me of something and I'm going to start another thread about it.

[untakenname]

I'd say it's more common now than in the 70's/80's as the percentage of young people with a driver licence has fallen to the lowest level since records begun.
I believe this is due to the rise of uber and also that insurance is astronomical for young drivers plus most insist you're burdened with a blackbox which takes all the joy away.


I live in London so if people ask for lifts it's usually long distances or events.

I don't mind if they put in for fuel (both my cars get under 20mpg on a run) one time a few years back when myself and a couple of friends went to a stag do we met a friend of the stag that I didn't know but one of the other members did so I offered to make a detour on the way back to drop them back as they lived relatively close to my route, they point blank refused to put in for fuel as we were setting off so I asked how much a train ticket was then they got the idea.

[sociopath]

I seem to disagree with everyone else on here, but you really didn't go to a funeral because you didn't want to help someone else get there?

You sound delightful.

[davhill]

IME non-driving lift beggars seem to think my car runs on fresh air.

[TwigtheWonderkid]

My best friend doesn't drive. He almost has to be forced into accepting lifts. It's ridiculous. He's undergoing cancer treatment at the moment and would be getting public transport or taxis home after chemo if I wasn't on his case demanding to know his appointments and driving him there and back. And the journeys are painful, because he spends the whole time saying how grateful he is, and that I really don't need to do this.

Errr, I know I don't need to, I want to, you soppy . Stfu and enjoy watching people waiting at the bus stop as we pass them.

When I was a kid, with a miserable home life, I more or less lived round his house.

[scottyp123]

sociopath said:

I seem to disagree with everyone else on here, but you really didn't go to a funeral because you didn't want to help someone else get there?

You sound delightful.

Not at all, I didn't want to go in the first place really but thought I should maybe make the effort. It was just someone who we have done a few jobs for in the past, not a relation or anything like that. The funeral was a work day for us, we are really busy at the moment, it meant rushing the job, scurrying home, getting showered, changed and then driving to the crem and then to the pub.

My thought process was I was too busy, there won't be anywhere to park at the crem and I won't be able to have a drink after anyway as I was driving and if I do have a drink I would probably miss the next day of work which I really didn't want.

This was before the person rang up last minute expecting a lift, after that I just decided to sack it off altogether and I'm glad I did in the end.

[NMNeil]

It's not so much giving someone a lift into town because I'm heading there anyway, it's when they get out of the car and announce "I'll only be about half an hour, so where will I meet you so you can give me a lift back?"

[mac96]

The other annoying thing is those who bang on about how they don't drive as if it made them morally better,, but expect to be driven everywhere instead. Even if they chip in for petrol (unlikely) it is still annoying.

[LeadFarmer]

I've had a LR Defender for the last 15 years (sold it recently) and whenever we had heavy snow - meaning work mates couldn't get into work - they would ask if I could give them a lift, which I often did.

One of them had a nice sports car so one summer I asked him if he would give me a lift to work. He asked if my Defender had broken down and I said 'No, I'd just like a lift to work in a sports car with it being nice weather'. He refused and didn't quite understand the point I was making. I reminded him of it the following winter when it snowed.

I'd also get asked a lot to take stuff to the tip for folk, seeing as it was just an 'old Defender'. They didn't like it when I refused, explaining it might be an old Defender to them, but it was my pride and joy.