Am I turning into a girlie?

[shirepro]

Yesterday morning in the bathroom, all of a sudden I turned into a girlie. I found myself applying lip balm and moisturiser, and I hadn't had a cold sore, been sanding floorboards or anything. To confirm my suspicions, in the garden we have a number of varities of poppy, and I referred to one of them as being 'Cerise'in colour. What is happening to me???? As a bloke I only know 4 colours except the paint and upholstery options from Lotus, and here I am talking about 'Cerise'. The final straw came when I suggested to my wife that we take Wednesday off and go to the shopping village outside York, and then took her to lunch and ordered a salad. Genetalia is stil there but for how long??

What other danger signs should I be on the look out for? (I have checked, and I can still reverse into a parking space at the moment).

[catretriever]

I could tell you, but you'd probably go off in a huff and then return hours later to complain that I've been ignoring you and that things have changed between us.

[wingchundave]

That all depends....do you own a man bag? How many shoes have you purchased recently stating "but they were a bargain"?

[993SC]

Did you spend more than a tenner on your last haircut and then expect EVERYONE to notice your new hairdo when you came out?

[cotty]

shirepro said:

I found myself applying lip balm and moisturiser,

You havent been doing lots of crunches and an urge to return some video tapes

[wedg1e]

Yep, definitely.
Tell you what, I'll swap you a beautiful Renault Clio for your Lotus.
The Clio is cinnamon with taupe seats and mocha carpets. It has a special pull-out knob to hang your handbag on and everything...

[wingchundave]

993SC said:

Did you spend more than a tenner on your last haircut and then expect EVERYONE to notice your new hairdo when you came out?

Oh my GOD!!! It's happening to me too!

[rsvmilly]

wedg1e said:

Yep, definitely. Tell you what, I'll swap you a beautiful Renault Clio for your Lotus. The Clio is cinnamon with taupe seats and mocha carpets. It has a special pull-out knob to hang your handbag on and everything...

Is that the one with the optional under-seat storage for your heels?

[lazyitus]

You sound just about OK, at the moment anyway.

Start to worry if you are adopting a camp style whilst sat down. IE - Crossing your legs in a feminine manner.

You don't do this already, do you?

[titiany]

Aha! Another convert! Mwa-ha-hahahaha!

[simpo two]

shirepro said:

As a bloke I only know 4 colours except the paint and upholstery options from Lotus, and here I am talking about 'Cerise'.

Acid test - who spanks who?

[nubbin]

Ladyboy.

[wingchundave]

Anyone remember the Two Ronnies and the worm that turned? Shirepro will be wearing a dress before he knows it.

[lil]

Oh this has cracked me up!! Bless you hun!!

'Cerise'???!!!

[grumpy rob]

catretriever said:

I could tell you, but you'd probably go off in a huff and then return hours later to complain that I've been ignoring you and that things have changed between us.

shirepro; put down them "products" and do something manly. Knock down a wall/Go to the Track/Order the biggest stake you can. Quickly whilst its not too late!

[wingchundave]

grumpy rob said:

Order the biggest stake you can.

Why? Does putting up a fence or hunting vampires make you more manly?

[lazyitus]

wingchundave said:

grumpy rob said: Order the biggest stake you can. Why? Does putting up a fence or hunting vampires make you more manly?

[BliarOut]

Have you needed to have two or three "bites" when you pull up to the pay machine at a multi-storey car park recently? That's a dead giveaway

[cotty]

wingchundave said:

grumpy rob said: Order the biggest stake you can. Why? Does putting up a fence or hunting vampires make you more manly?

Yes if it makes you look like Van Helsing/Hugh Jackman

[tonyhetherington]

resist the temptation!

Those high heels and suspenders are NOT as comfortable as they look alledgedly and there is NO benefit to a Tesco's Club Card!!

Quick, quick, go an drive sideways round a roundabout (just because you can), scratch your nackers in public (just because you can), burp really loudly (just because you can) and sit on the loo reading the latest Evo.

I'm pretty sure that will butch you up. Otherwise....