"Common Law" Separation
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Discussion

Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Myself and my girlfriend of 10+ years have recently separated.

She moved into my house at the start of the relationship, and will be moving out shortly.

We have no children together.

We have agreed a something between us to help her start over.

Her family have recently started up with the "take half his house" chatter, and are pushing her to go legal on me. They seem to believe that I have some obligation in law due to the length of time we've been together meant we were living as "common law husband and wife".

My understanding (and my ex-girlfriend's) is that this is a load of nonsense and there is no legal obligation here.

I'd be grateful if anyone with relevant knowledge of the situation could confirm what the true position is. If people need any additional details to make an informed comment, then please ask.

Thank you for any advice you can give.

Volvolover

2,036 posts

70 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
She will have a claim on the equity if she can prove she's contributed to the household, ie paid bills, groceries etc and you didn't have a rent agreement with her

There is no such thing as common law wife though and her relatives sound like typical scrounging scrubbers, hopefully you can get out of it without too much pain.

spookly

4,388 posts

124 months

LargeRed

1,654 posts

77 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
"We have no children together."

sounds to me, this is not your first break up ?


Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Volvolover said:
She will have a claim on the equity if she can prove she's contributed to the household, ie paid bills, groceries etc and you didn't have a rent agreement with her

There is no such thing as common law wife though and her relatives sound like typical scrounging scrubbers, hopefully you can get out of it without too much pain.
In terms on material contributions, in the course of the relationship she has contributed a two piece suite (she purchased) and a dining room table & chairs (donated by her sister).

The settlement we have agreed is multiple times higher than the material contributions.

Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
spookly said:
Thank you - I have seen similarly worded stuff on other legal advice places on the internet ... but it can be difficult to work out what is still current and what is now out of date.

Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
LargeRed said:
"We have no children together."

sounds to me, this is not your first break up ?
I'm unsure of the relevance of that.

As an adult, this is my second break up (I'm in my late 30s). My first was very simple as we rented together, had a joint account for bills, and just terminated the rental agreement, closed the joint account, and went our separate ways. That was more than 10 years ago now ...

Would it be easier if I said that I have no children, and while she has multiple from a previous marriage, they are all adults at this point.

LordHaveMurci

12,336 posts

198 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
There is no such thing, legally, as ‘common law’.

If she can’t prove she contributed then legally she has NO claim on your house.

My Ex left with what she contributed, nothing, after a longer period than yours. I spoke to four separate solicitors as everybody I knew assured me I was screwed.

This was 2yrs ago, I doubt anything has changed.

Volvolover

2,036 posts

70 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Rotary Potato said:
Volvolover said:
She will have a claim on the equity if she can prove she's contributed to the household, ie paid bills, groceries etc and you didn't have a rent agreement with her

There is no such thing as common law wife though and her relatives sound like typical scrounging scrubbers, hopefully you can get out of it without too much pain.
In terms on material contributions, in the course of the relationship she has contributed a two piece suite (she purchased) and a dining room table & chairs (donated by her sister).

The settlement we have agreed is multiple times higher than the material contributions.
Sounds good, so she never bought shopping or paid bills or mortgage? No standing orders in the bank etc?

If thats still no, get a solicitor to draw up an agreement and get it signed pronto. It'll mean peace of mind trust me

anonymous-user

83 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Volvolover said:
Rotary Potato said:
Volvolover said:
She will have a claim on the equity if she can prove she's contributed to the household, ie paid bills, groceries etc and you didn't have a rent agreement with her

There is no such thing as common law wife though and her relatives sound like typical scrounging scrubbers, hopefully you can get out of it without too much pain.
In terms on material contributions, in the course of the relationship she has contributed a two piece suite (she purchased) and a dining room table & chairs (donated by her sister).

The settlement we have agreed is multiple times higher than the material contributions.
Sounds good, so she never bought shopping or paid bills or mortgage? No standing orders in the bank etc?

If thats still no, get a solicitor to draw up an agreement and get it signed pronto. It'll mean peace of mind trust me
Are you sure that contributing to the food shopping is grounds for a claim? I’m certainly not.


LordHaveMurci

12,336 posts

198 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
garyhun said:
Are you sure that contributing to the food shopping is grounds for a claim? I’m certainly not.
It isn’t.

anonymous-user

83 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
LordHaveMurci said:
garyhun said:
Are you sure that contributing to the food shopping is grounds for a claim? I’m certainly not.
It isn’t.
Indeed. Why do people post on these threads with advice when they haven’t got a clue?

LargeRed

1,654 posts

77 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Rotary Potato said:
LargeRed said:
"We have no children together."

sounds to me, this is not your first break up ?
I'm unsure of the relevance of that.

As an adult, this is my second break up (I'm in my late 30s). My first was very simple as we rented together, had a joint account for bills, and just terminated the rental agreement, closed the joint account, and went our separate ways. That was more than 10 years ago now ...

Would it be easier if I said that I have no children, and while she has multiple from a previous marriage, they are all adults at this point.
there is always a story ....... behind thee story.

Volvolover

2,036 posts

70 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
LordHaveMurci said:
garyhun said:
Are you sure that contributing to the food shopping is grounds for a claim? I’m certainly not.
It isn’t.
I'm probably being a bit vague, but if she contributed to a bills account say and utility bills and groceries came out of there then she could claim to be contributing to the household. So no not specifically food shopping but if the loose verbal agreement was that she put a bit in to cover food and she denies it there is only a paper trail to show contributions into that account.......and OP would have a hard time proving otherwise.

I have seen the above example occur in real life not internet theory and perhaps was too brief in my initial explanation

D1ckie

741 posts

219 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Here is how my solicitor described it to me many years ago when I split from an ex, all be it with a joint mortgage on a house, where she felt so was entitled to more than half plus a share of my assets.

Just because you are getting your cock wet with the person you live with does not give them any rights to anything you have personally if you are not married.

If you had your mate living with you in your house for the last 10 years and then decided you didn't want them there anymore, they also wouldn't have a claim on you or the house unless you bought it together.

The fact you are offering to help her back on her feet after the split is admirable enough IMO

Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
LordHaveMurci said:
There is no such thing, legally, as ‘common law’.

If she can’t prove she contributed then legally she has NO claim on your house.

My Ex left with what she contributed, nothing, after a longer period than yours. I spoke to four separate solicitors as everybody I knew assured me I was screwed.

This was 2yrs ago, I doubt anything has changed.
Thank you.

av185

20,464 posts

156 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
I started a thread recently on 'financial rights of my girlfriend if she moves in with me' and was quite shocked at the outcome and potential rights she has.

No children involved btw.

The thread turned up some fairly bizarre eye opening and shocking hometruths as to her rights and as a result she hasn't moved in but we are still seeing each other at weekends only which actually suits me better. How long this will last is anyones guess.

Unless your girlfriend has signed a rent agreement becoming a tenant it would appear she has fairly extensive rights to claim against you furthermore you cannot technically make her homeless by asking her to leave. Obvs if you both agree an amicable solution that is the preferred option but the problems arise if she lawyers up after the usual consulting with her pushy 'screw him for everything' type mates etc once the rose tinted spectacles of a loving relationship have long disappeared.

Btw cohabitation agreements would appear to provide little protection and if you die she could also potentially have a claim on both your property and assets!


limpsfield

6,666 posts

282 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
LargeRed said:
Rotary Potato said:
LargeRed said:
"We have no children together."

sounds to me, this is not your first break up ?
I'm unsure of the relevance of that.

As an adult, this is my second break up (I'm in my late 30s). My first was very simple as we rented together, had a joint account for bills, and just terminated the rental agreement, closed the joint account, and went our separate ways. That was more than 10 years ago now ...

Would it be easier if I said that I have no children, and while she has multiple from a previous marriage, they are all adults at this point.
there is always a story ....... behind thee story.
It’s called life

Rotary Potato

Original Poster:

603 posts

125 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
Volvolover said:
Sounds good, so she never bought shopping or paid bills or mortgage? No standing orders in the bank etc?

If thats still no, get a solicitor to draw up an agreement and get it signed pronto. It'll mean peace of mind trust me
She never bought the 'main' weekly shop. She most definitely bought bits & bobs while she was out over the years. "While you're at the shop, could you grab XXXX, we've run out" type of thing. And she never paid any bills or contributed to my mortgage.

To be fair to her, she thinks her family aren't correct here, and hasn't made any hints at all about wanting any more. We spoke, we agreed on what seemed like it was 'right', and that, as far as we are both concerned, is that.

s55shh

523 posts

241 months

Tuesday 30th November 2021
quotequote all
D1ckie said:
Here is how my solicitor described it to me many years ago when I split from an ex, all be it with a joint mortgage on a house, where she felt so was entitled to more than half plus a share of my assets.

Just because you are getting your cock wet with the person you live with does not give them any rights to anything you have personally if you are not married.

If you had your mate living with you in your house for the last 10 years and then decided you didn't want them there anymore, they also wouldn't have a claim on you or the house unless you bought it together.

The fact you are offering to help her back on her feet after the split is admirable enough IMO
My Barrister described it as state funded blackmail when my ex got legal aid for a TLATA case for half my house. Her claim was based on an assertion that I had promised her half despite admitting in evidence that, "There is nothing in writing in this respect, indeed it was never directly discussed."